[The feed clicks up in the dark, and Alphonse seems to be outside, sitting by the riverbank. The moon is full enough to see by, and there's the sound of rushing water, very nearby. He smiles just barely, and when he breathes, his breath fogs in the air. Thankfully he's dressed in a warm sweater, although he shivers now and again. Though it's hard
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Look. She loves you...I'm sure of it, and I know you are, too. She's not going to love you any less.
Tell her. That's what I think. Just sit down and tell her.
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... she thinks I'm wonderful and she thinks the world of me... and I'm so scared. I don't want to break that up for her. I don't want her to think I'm bad or that she screwed up somehow...
... I'm scared, Ollie.
Ed walked away from me... when he found out. He walked away. He didn't come back for a long time, but I saw something in his eyes, I--
[Al's voice breaks.]
... I never want to see that with her... what... what if she doesn't love me anymore...?
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Would it help if you had someone there, with you? I
I could do that, you know. I'll stand there with you, you need it. Okay?
She loves you, Alphonse. There en't nothing that is gunna change that, okay?
Nothing.
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Ollie... thank you. That means a lot.
Doesn't stop me from being scared to death.
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You've told me - even if it was by accident, I'm sure you would've said something sooner than later... I hope - I think that was the hardest part.
You should just tell her, what more can ya do? We've already admitted our sins and mistakes... this... it'll be okay.
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What the hell are you talking about Al?! You're letting this get to your head, damn it.
OF COURSE SHE LOVES YOU AS MUCH AS I LOVE YOU - Probably.. probably more.
Al, you can tell her anything...
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Maybe you should ask.
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But I guess... it's okay when you tell her...
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... I don't know how to tell her.
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I don't think I can be of much help with that, since the time I got married, I had already abandoned all the bounds with my family...
But... from what you have told me... I think she will accept it. And still love you.
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... I'm... scared, Jowy. In my world, it's a taboo thing. It's wrong, it's bad. It doesn't matter that I can't help who I like... and what you grow up being told always stays with you.
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[A soft sigh.]
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I do not know your mother, but if this scares you so much I suspect it will eat at you and strain your relation with her if you conceal it. If it is out in the open, whether or not she accepts it immediately, there is the chance she will come to accept it, or tolerate it, and you two could work it out. If you conceal it you will never know if she would even reject you.
Also, you happen to be a terrible liar. She'll notice something is wrong sooner or later. It's probably best if you tell her now, instead of having her find out another way.
[Itachi's voice isn't exactly warm but it's... Measured and present, not so distant as his normal speech. There's a certain attentive quality he rarely displays.]
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Just... have you ever... had someone think you were so perfect, and so wonderful, and so beautiful, that you could never do anything wrong... look at you like you'd just shattered them?
I understand what you're saying, Itachi... it makes sense, it all makes sense...
... but I'm scared of that moment. I'm scared of her looking at me like that, I'm scared of that one moment, even if she decides afterwards that she loves me no matter what. I'm sure she will. I have faith in her.
But she's the angel from my memory. From the time I was a little kid I wanted more than anything to be beautiful and perfect for her, so she'd be proud of me, so she'd smile for me. She would have done it anyway, I know, but...
[Al takes a shaky breath.]
Even if it makes it better in the end, and knowing I have to do it... I'm still so afraid of that moment.
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It was a different situation maybe, but the look was the same.
[Itachi pauses, and the sound of the PCD being moved is accompanied by the sound of Itachi re-adjusting.]
And I also know what it is to want to make your parents proud of you. To strive beyond everything to be everything they desire, everything they could expect and be proud of.
I know what it is to want to be what you think they want.
[Itachi's voice is low and takes on that distant quality again, removed, detached.]
But you make the choice--live for them or live for your own beliefs and to be your own person. If she gives you that look...
[A short pause.]
It cannot be helped. But at least you will have been honest, with yourself and with her, and she cannot ask for more, I think. Not if she wants you to truly grow into your own person.
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