Sloppy Drunk And Falling Down
The following is a review of the Sister Machine Gun Show I saw last night as well as a commentary on the bars in Pioneer Square.
The night started off on a mildly bad note. The website told us the doors opened at six. In actuality they opened at eight. We went to the Central Saloon. I ordered a Vanilla Stoli and Coke, Jess had a tequila sour and a draft beer, and Mike also had a tequila sour. My drink was made decently strong while Mike and Jess basically had glasses of sour mix. we stayed at the Central for about forty minutes. We then returned to the Fenix to wait for the doors to open. After we had been sitting out front for about twenty five minutes we hear someone screaming. We turned our heads in time to see a short stout blonde woman screaming and running after a man whose shirt is torn and he is just zipping along. She screams "Darryl get back here" at this point she falls and tumbles about three feet, thus allowing Darryl to get away. The woman gets up and gives chases screaming "Darryl don't stumble in the street!!!"
The doors finally open around 8:15 pm. We go inside and to our pleasant surprise find that cover is 10 dollars (usd). We immediately walk around and check the place out. We end up upstairs where we again all order drinks. I have nothing but water this round. Jess orders a whiskey sour and Mike gets another Tequila sour. Jess brings his drink over to the bench we are sitting on, this might need some explanation for those of you who have never been to the Fenix Underground. The Fenix has an ultimately decent layout. When you walk in your on the ground floor, the first thing you see is a hallway with a bar in it. The second thing you notice are stairs leading up. As you walk around the ground floor you find the stage area and another bar. There are also stairs leading up close to the stage. If you were to wander up these stairs you will find a whole new floor. There are benches strategically placed by tables lit from within. Yes there's another bar up here. Then also close to the entrance is the coat check room, to the right of this small area are steps going down. We were there for an industrial show so what we found at the bottom of the stairs was frightening. A nightclub for Candy kids. I was the first to go downstairs where I was immediately detained and questioned as to why I was there by some girls who appeared to be the Candy Kid Gestapo. Their uniform consisted of shorts, tank top, feather boa, trendy open toed shoes and thirty gallon buckets of glitter. I managed to get away without being sprinkled. Victory is mine.
Regardless Jess again got a drink that was mostly sour mix. He was unhappy. The drinks are way overpriced and overpriced is bad enough. They don't have to make the drinks weak as infant formula. We hear music from downstairs so we decide to descend on the way Jess buys a round of tequila shots and Mike a round of beer. Nice musical accompaniment. We come downstairs to see the stage is set for two men and their tiny musical arsenal.
They were BLACK PILL BOOK-post industrial seudo political wanna be punk rock borgeouis scum.
The gentleman singing just sounded like he wanted to be rob halford. except he had no vocal skills or stage presence. His lyrical content was absolutely crap. I've listened to Industrial music for years. I know some lyrics aren't that great. This guy was worse than a fully drunk Sasha from KMFDM. terrible.
Then there was his little friend. We will call him the instrumental section. He stood in front of a laptop computer and a my first sequencer Oxygen 8. He barely used the ivories on the oxygen. most of his time was spent looking like he was actually playing an instrument even though he was only clicking a mouse button.
Reliving this torture is painful so I will end my review by giving them an F-. the F stands for FUCKING SHITTY.
Insert twenty minute interlude. I become friends with some of the SeaGoths. They are nice enough and not as cliquey as some people told me they were. I sustained quite a few invitations to clubs and fetish events. The lustful rhythms of powernoise slowly draw us back to the floor as Manufactura took the stage. He is apparently a hometown hero.
He stood proudly in front of his keyboard stand loaded with sequencers and samplers and other tech effects. He had great presence and he made decent music. (as powernoise musicians don't move around the stage much this will be short.) Overall I sat down and totally enjoyed his set. I give Manufactura a B. (mainly for immobility.)
Insert second interlude. I again go downstairs. I am not stopped by the Gestapo this time. They are too busy standing in a corner and touching each other and giggling to notice my re entry. I am astounded by a magician of a now unknown name. He did tricks with cards and foam rabbits. mildly amusing. I go back upstairs and I am accosted by demo teams. The smirnoff ice girls were there. I was given a pen some mints and numerous free bottles of Smirnoff ice Red label. I drank it because it was free. I'll pay for it later. I was also given a zippo lighter by the Marlboro demo team. Very nice fellahs, thanks.
Next on stage was Christ Analog. They were quite good, although they went from being and icy coldwave band to an apparent attempt at sounding like Rage Against The Machine. They told us ribald tales of when they used to play at the old Fenix. Then they rocked out for a good long while. People were dancing, including yours truly. I danced to the point I was shook up like a soda can and had to sit down. All in all another fun set. I will give this band a B also. (B is for the uber genre shift they have undergone.)
The next interlude is lost as by this time I no longer remember what i was drinking or where i was. I just remember thinking that the last band was coming up soon. And Lo and Behold Sister Machine Gun took the stage with a vengeance.
They rocked and rolled we danced and felt alive. They opened with a small set of songs from their new album on the label polytronic. when they were done with those they got into what the band called their "Free Music". Their first four albums are on Waxtrax which is owned by TVT a lecherous group of pedantic assholes who can't pay their bills. So SMG's first four albums are owned by a bank. They gave everyone permission to download those first four albums. I will set up a link to where you can do so at a later date. All in All this was a very well done show. SMG showed that you can never be too old to get a crowd of Goth kids into a dancing orgy like mess even if you don't sound remotely like synth pop. Thank you SMG,thank you very much Grade:A
Overall Show:B they had a really really crappy band open. Then they had the amazing Genre switchers. SMG was very cool it was just the overall mix was crappy.
The night started off on a mildly bad note. The website told us the doors opened at six. In actuality they opened at eight. We went to the Central Saloon. I ordered a Vanilla Stoli and Coke, Jess had a tequila sour and a draft beer, and Mike also had a tequila sour. My drink was made decently strong while Mike and Jess basically had glasses of sour mix. we stayed at the Central for about forty minutes. We then returned to the Fenix to wait for the doors to open. After we had been sitting out front for about twenty five minutes we hear someone screaming. We turned our heads in time to see a short stout blonde woman screaming and running after a man whose shirt is torn and he is just zipping along. She screams "Darryl get back here" at this point she falls and tumbles about three feet, thus allowing Darryl to get away. The woman gets up and gives chases screaming "Darryl don't stumble in the street!!!"
The doors finally open around 8:15 pm. We go inside and to our pleasant surprise find that cover is 10 dollars (usd). We immediately walk around and check the place out. We end up upstairs where we again all order drinks. I have nothing but water this round. Jess orders a whiskey sour and Mike gets another Tequila sour. Jess brings his drink over to the bench we are sitting on, this might need some explanation for those of you who have never been to the Fenix Underground. The Fenix has an ultimately decent layout. When you walk in your on the ground floor, the first thing you see is a hallway with a bar in it. The second thing you notice are stairs leading up. As you walk around the ground floor you find the stage area and another bar. There are also stairs leading up close to the stage. If you were to wander up these stairs you will find a whole new floor. There are benches strategically placed by tables lit from within. Yes there's another bar up here. Then also close to the entrance is the coat check room, to the right of this small area are steps going down. We were there for an industrial show so what we found at the bottom of the stairs was frightening. A nightclub for Candy kids. I was the first to go downstairs where I was immediately detained and questioned as to why I was there by some girls who appeared to be the Candy Kid Gestapo. Their uniform consisted of shorts, tank top, feather boa, trendy open toed shoes and thirty gallon buckets of glitter. I managed to get away without being sprinkled. Victory is mine.
Regardless Jess again got a drink that was mostly sour mix. He was unhappy. The drinks are way overpriced and overpriced is bad enough. They don't have to make the drinks weak as infant formula. We hear music from downstairs so we decide to descend on the way Jess buys a round of tequila shots and Mike a round of beer. Nice musical accompaniment. We come downstairs to see the stage is set for two men and their tiny musical arsenal.
They were BLACK PILL BOOK-post industrial seudo political wanna be punk rock borgeouis scum.
The gentleman singing just sounded like he wanted to be rob halford. except he had no vocal skills or stage presence. His lyrical content was absolutely crap. I've listened to Industrial music for years. I know some lyrics aren't that great. This guy was worse than a fully drunk Sasha from KMFDM. terrible.
Then there was his little friend. We will call him the instrumental section. He stood in front of a laptop computer and a my first sequencer Oxygen 8. He barely used the ivories on the oxygen. most of his time was spent looking like he was actually playing an instrument even though he was only clicking a mouse button.
Reliving this torture is painful so I will end my review by giving them an F-. the F stands for FUCKING SHITTY.
Insert twenty minute interlude. I become friends with some of the SeaGoths. They are nice enough and not as cliquey as some people told me they were. I sustained quite a few invitations to clubs and fetish events. The lustful rhythms of powernoise slowly draw us back to the floor as Manufactura took the stage. He is apparently a hometown hero.
He stood proudly in front of his keyboard stand loaded with sequencers and samplers and other tech effects. He had great presence and he made decent music. (as powernoise musicians don't move around the stage much this will be short.) Overall I sat down and totally enjoyed his set. I give Manufactura a B. (mainly for immobility.)
Insert second interlude. I again go downstairs. I am not stopped by the Gestapo this time. They are too busy standing in a corner and touching each other and giggling to notice my re entry. I am astounded by a magician of a now unknown name. He did tricks with cards and foam rabbits. mildly amusing. I go back upstairs and I am accosted by demo teams. The smirnoff ice girls were there. I was given a pen some mints and numerous free bottles of Smirnoff ice Red label. I drank it because it was free. I'll pay for it later. I was also given a zippo lighter by the Marlboro demo team. Very nice fellahs, thanks.
Next on stage was Christ Analog. They were quite good, although they went from being and icy coldwave band to an apparent attempt at sounding like Rage Against The Machine. They told us ribald tales of when they used to play at the old Fenix. Then they rocked out for a good long while. People were dancing, including yours truly. I danced to the point I was shook up like a soda can and had to sit down. All in all another fun set. I will give this band a B also. (B is for the uber genre shift they have undergone.)
The next interlude is lost as by this time I no longer remember what i was drinking or where i was. I just remember thinking that the last band was coming up soon. And Lo and Behold Sister Machine Gun took the stage with a vengeance.
They rocked and rolled we danced and felt alive. They opened with a small set of songs from their new album on the label polytronic. when they were done with those they got into what the band called their "Free Music". Their first four albums are on Waxtrax which is owned by TVT a lecherous group of pedantic assholes who can't pay their bills. So SMG's first four albums are owned by a bank. They gave everyone permission to download those first four albums. I will set up a link to where you can do so at a later date. All in All this was a very well done show. SMG showed that you can never be too old to get a crowd of Goth kids into a dancing orgy like mess even if you don't sound remotely like synth pop. Thank you SMG,thank you very much Grade:A
Overall Show:B they had a really really crappy band open. Then they had the amazing Genre switchers. SMG was very cool it was just the overall mix was crappy.