45th entry...
well...have not used this is a while..it seems pretty pointless to me now...
School is going good I guess..I've done all my work so far..and actually put a lot of effort into it...which has made such a difference so far..I have not gotten a grade under 90 yet..whoo hooo...thats a big difference for me...I'm used to ...haha..well 13-60 as a grade. :-p I never did a damn thing...well..last year I didn't do a damn thing..every other year I guess was okay... but..well big improvement there..so very proud of myself. for trying.
I start driver's ed Nov. 3rd..i'm so excited.. :-D... i just want to get muh license...yes yes..that will be in a year. but I get a car in April.. :)..and I am gonna have to be my mom's shaufer.. (spelling haha)...but anyways...I'll get my hours in. and since I will have my permit a few months before I will be getting my car...i can use my grandparents car..and my grandparents will go driving with me :-p so excited. haha. whoooo.
What else?..I dunno..Corey. wow..we got into the biggest fight ever the other night..I guess ou could say it was my fault but I don't really know how we got on to talking about all the shit we did...it was frustrating...everything has been lately. I gues space would be a good thing for us...huh?.. well whatever. I was talking to Josh last night...and..well..I dunno..we realized how obvious things are between us...It's kinda weird.. lol..we want and need the same things..and it just...err..first loves last forever..whether you want them to or not. Corey...is more then enough for me..but some things I need..that are essential to me in a relationship ...i don't get from him. all i wanted to do last night was have someone to fall asleep with..I was sleeping in my moms bed cuz shes gone for the weekend..and..err it was so lonely laying there... I almost wished Josh could have been there..and not in a sexual way..just to know someone is sleeping right there with you is such a comforting feeling... And...I need to be touched..and no i don't mean like..fucked touched..lol..it could be a bonus at some points though.. haha..but no. I love to be held..I love holding people..I love physical contact... it's not Corey's thing..and I don't know how things will work out with that one big difference..along with many others we have..yet..he's my BEST friend...ever. always will be... and..I dunno..I guess what took us so long to finaly get together was that fact..what if something happens and we end up hating eachother...thats no good. I couldn't live a day of my life without Corey... but.. i dunno..i guess it's the risk we chose to take. he's been so upset lately..about everytrhing with family..wayyyy understandable.. but.. I don't know what I can do to help him..obviously nothign and he won't even talk about it. I hate feeling helpless..It's in my nature to take care of ppl when I know something is wrong..and he does not let me do that for him..
I love Corey..more then ever..but..I just don't know how long this is going to last... whether it's me thinking that..or him. I think we're prolly both in the same position right about now..but hey who knows...he never talks. :-/..i'm super frustrated. whatever.
Tonight should be fun. We're supposed to go to Angie's...which I miss her dearly.. lol..and..well I'm getting a ride to school in the morning..i have a guidance appointment at 1:30 getting a few of my classes switched..hopefully picking up a new one.don't know what it will be yet.. but hey who knows?!.. I need another credit..I am DETERMINED to graduate with my class..and once I have my license next year I can go to night school for some of it.. :).. yay. whooooo hoooo. so excited. lol..i'm doing what I need to do for me.. and I think thats how the next 3 years are going to be. I've done a lot of changing.. alot of growing up and I am pretty happy with where I am in life right now...in almost every aspect. whooo.
Jeri therrin..i just don't know what to say. i have obviously changed since kim and i got into a fight..and she decided sh was going to judge me for it.. I don't really care if she thinks i'm a slut...because.. in my opinion..it's completely opposite. so..if she decides she wants to do something about it..or wants to fight me...so be it..throw the first punch. I'm not soo scared of you anymore lil girl.
fuck off :)
<3 Meg*
School is going good I guess..I've done all my work so far..and actually put a lot of effort into it...which has made such a difference so far..I have not gotten a grade under 90 yet..whoo hooo...thats a big difference for me...I'm used to ...haha..well 13-60 as a grade. :-p I never did a damn thing...well..last year I didn't do a damn thing..every other year I guess was okay... but..well big improvement there..so very proud of myself. for trying.
I start driver's ed Nov. 3rd..i'm so excited.. :-D... i just want to get muh license...yes yes..that will be in a year. but I get a car in April.. :)..and I am gonna have to be my mom's shaufer.. (spelling haha)...but anyways...I'll get my hours in. and since I will have my permit a few months before I will be getting my car...i can use my grandparents car..and my grandparents will go driving with me :-p so excited. haha. whoooo.
What else?..I dunno..Corey. wow..we got into the biggest fight ever the other night..I guess ou could say it was my fault but I don't really know how we got on to talking about all the shit we did...it was frustrating...everything has been lately. I gues space would be a good thing for us...huh?.. well whatever. I was talking to Josh last night...and..well..I dunno..we realized how obvious things are between us...It's kinda weird.. lol..we want and need the same things..and it just...err..first loves last forever..whether you want them to or not. Corey...is more then enough for me..but some things I need..that are essential to me in a relationship ...i don't get from him. all i wanted to do last night was have someone to fall asleep with..I was sleeping in my moms bed cuz shes gone for the weekend..and..err it was so lonely laying there... I almost wished Josh could have been there..and not in a sexual way..just to know someone is sleeping right there with you is such a comforting feeling... And...I need to be touched..and no i don't mean like..fucked touched..lol..it could be a bonus at some points though.. haha..but no. I love to be held..I love holding people..I love physical contact... it's not Corey's thing..and I don't know how things will work out with that one big difference..along with many others we have..yet..he's my BEST friend...ever. always will be... and..I dunno..I guess what took us so long to finaly get together was that fact..what if something happens and we end up hating eachother...thats no good. I couldn't live a day of my life without Corey... but.. i dunno..i guess it's the risk we chose to take. he's been so upset lately..about everytrhing with family..wayyyy understandable.. but.. I don't know what I can do to help him..obviously nothign and he won't even talk about it. I hate feeling helpless..It's in my nature to take care of ppl when I know something is wrong..and he does not let me do that for him..
I love Corey..more then ever..but..I just don't know how long this is going to last... whether it's me thinking that..or him. I think we're prolly both in the same position right about now..but hey who knows...he never talks. :-/..i'm super frustrated. whatever.
Tonight should be fun. We're supposed to go to Angie's...which I miss her dearly.. lol..and..well I'm getting a ride to school in the morning..i have a guidance appointment at 1:30 getting a few of my classes switched..hopefully picking up a new one.don't know what it will be yet.. but hey who knows?!.. I need another credit..I am DETERMINED to graduate with my class..and once I have my license next year I can go to night school for some of it.. :).. yay. whooooo hoooo. so excited. lol..i'm doing what I need to do for me.. and I think thats how the next 3 years are going to be. I've done a lot of changing.. alot of growing up and I am pretty happy with where I am in life right now...in almost every aspect. whooo.
Jeri therrin..i just don't know what to say. i have obviously changed since kim and i got into a fight..and she decided sh was going to judge me for it.. I don't really care if she thinks i'm a slut...because.. in my opinion..it's completely opposite. so..if she decides she wants to do something about it..or wants to fight me...so be it..throw the first punch. I'm not soo scared of you anymore lil girl.
fuck off :)
<3 Meg*