My life is nothing without you...
I honestly feel like a part of myself is missing, and has been for the past few days. I have no life without him. I need him around. Just to be here with me because when he is I feel like nothing can hurt me. I've been so anxious. Just not myself. I'm not usually this bad, I don't usually need to depend on others so much. But it's like I've changed. And I don't think that I like it. I just hate fucking feeling this way, like I have no control. But there's nothing I can do. He'll be home soon, I just have to think about it that way. Thank god he doesn't read this.... Onto other things.
Got the new Taproot cd. It's alright. I like gift a lot more. It just doesn't really sound like them. I don't know, maybe I'm crazy.
I don't talk to anyone from high school anymore other then like a total of 3 people. I miss my friends. But I feel like if I just called them up from out of nowhere it would be strange, but I guess that would make them not really my friends anymore. I hate that, when people just disappear. And I hate myself for disappearing. But how do you get back in touch with people without it getting weird? Just call them up and say hey how are you doing, I haven't talked to you for like a year but you want to hang out.... No. I wouldn't feel right. I feel like I've gotten a lot more shy since I've been out of school too. Which I really dislike. I liked being outgoing, able to talk to anyone. Fuck. Oh well, what the fuck can you do... Things change, people change, just have to learn to deal with it.
Work sucked today. I put my work clothes in the dryer last night before I went to bed to wake up and find that they are still damp as shit... What do I do? So I said fuck it, put on a tank top, grabbed my wet shirt and was off to work. Great way to start out the day. Then I got stuck in traffic for ten fucking minutes because of fucking construction. It just was not a good day today. Plus I need a fucking raise because I'm barely making it by. Too much fucking shit to pay, I guess I need to start looking for a new job. Or a second job or something. I live right next to American Tee Shirt Ltd so I think I might apply there or something. I could walk there in like two minutes so it would be worth it. No wasting of gas. But I don't know. I don't think I could handle two jobs though. We'll see I suppose.
My mom has court in two days. I'm pretty sure that she is just going to get house arrest. Which is awesome. She's really straightening her life out and I couldnt' be more happy or proud of her. She's really doing what none of us thought she ever could. Now she just has to divorce John.... The kiddies go back to school tomorrow. Hah! Sometimes I wish I was going back to school but then I think about it... I did my fucking time in that shithole and I'm glad to be out. Although I do miss the hangout and social gatherings... But life goes on.
I still don't know why I write in this, no one reads it anyway....
Got the new Taproot cd. It's alright. I like gift a lot more. It just doesn't really sound like them. I don't know, maybe I'm crazy.
I don't talk to anyone from high school anymore other then like a total of 3 people. I miss my friends. But I feel like if I just called them up from out of nowhere it would be strange, but I guess that would make them not really my friends anymore. I hate that, when people just disappear. And I hate myself for disappearing. But how do you get back in touch with people without it getting weird? Just call them up and say hey how are you doing, I haven't talked to you for like a year but you want to hang out.... No. I wouldn't feel right. I feel like I've gotten a lot more shy since I've been out of school too. Which I really dislike. I liked being outgoing, able to talk to anyone. Fuck. Oh well, what the fuck can you do... Things change, people change, just have to learn to deal with it.
Work sucked today. I put my work clothes in the dryer last night before I went to bed to wake up and find that they are still damp as shit... What do I do? So I said fuck it, put on a tank top, grabbed my wet shirt and was off to work. Great way to start out the day. Then I got stuck in traffic for ten fucking minutes because of fucking construction. It just was not a good day today. Plus I need a fucking raise because I'm barely making it by. Too much fucking shit to pay, I guess I need to start looking for a new job. Or a second job or something. I live right next to American Tee Shirt Ltd so I think I might apply there or something. I could walk there in like two minutes so it would be worth it. No wasting of gas. But I don't know. I don't think I could handle two jobs though. We'll see I suppose.
My mom has court in two days. I'm pretty sure that she is just going to get house arrest. Which is awesome. She's really straightening her life out and I couldnt' be more happy or proud of her. She's really doing what none of us thought she ever could. Now she just has to divorce John.... The kiddies go back to school tomorrow. Hah! Sometimes I wish I was going back to school but then I think about it... I did my fucking time in that shithole and I'm glad to be out. Although I do miss the hangout and social gatherings... But life goes on.
I still don't know why I write in this, no one reads it anyway....