(no subject)
5 days of teaching left to go and I'll admit that I am starting to feel a little blah. I've been talking to people (family, friends, work colleagues) trying to get through this emotional black hole at the moment.
My family are an odd bunch, some of us really religious and others not so much. I fall into the not so much category but I've always been willing to listen to those around me and take on board what they are saying. Whether it is a philosophy, a religious teaching or just plain and simple advice.
My Aunt (born and raised in Grenada) attended a very religious school when she was younger and my cousins have both had Holy Communion. She is also my God Mother. In all the years that I have been able to hold serious conversation with her there has only been one rule, one simple piece of advice that she has ever stuck by with me, consistent in how it is the one thing she will always tell me when I am unsure in life.
If something was meant to happen it will happen. If it isn't? Then the right path or choices in life will find you.
I guess the above picture pretty much means the same thing too.
So if I was meant to have stayed on and worked at SAGA they would never have made me redundant. I would never have gained my experiences or friends at the cinema or rediscovered who I am, especially with RP and LJ and all that jazz. Without being made redundant I would never have gotten my place as a GTT, never would have gone through this year of training to become a teacher in the end and walked away with my QTS and some amazing experiences and new people in my life. I would never have gotten my place on the Masters in Education course.
I'd never have dyed my hair black, gone to London to meet people I'd met online or gotten the tattoo on my foot.
I would never have met Matt.
I would never have fallen in love with this stranger and be making plans to move in together, maybe even marry and have children one day after we've travelled and seen America and Australia.
I just wouldn't have found me.
So I guess in the scheme of things, this black hole of emotion that I'm feeling isn't really necessary any more. I've just got to stop looking at what I haven't got and start remembering what I have got.
And what I have got?
It's pretty fucking amazing.