nothing is ever gonna be okay...espesically for me
what a fucked up day. im so depressed. i dont know what to do. after dance practice i went home and i seen my dad i thought he was gone again. guess i was wrong. i asked him to go rent The Grudge for me and to get something to eat. so he said he would but he wanted me n my brother to come for the ride. so we did.but now i really wish i didnt. on the way there he was just explaining to me all these things. saying that if it wasnt for me and my brother he would of commited suicide along time ago. were the only reason hes living. and you dont know how bad they scared me & hurt me. he kept telling us how sick he is and that he was so close to dying today. he said its definitly sure that he has cancer. im not ready for all this to happen. my parents are getting divorced. i cant stand my mom we dont get along at all and now i have to worry about my dad dying. on the way home he pulled the car to side of the street and said he'll be right back. he went out and put his hood on so we couldnt see but i know what he was doing. he was crying. its sad to know that it was the first time i ever seen my dad actaully cry in my whole life. then he came back in the car like nothing happened. i was so confused. i just looked the other way out the window and i tried so hard not to cry but i couldnt help it. all i kept thinking was that if this ever happens im definitly running away from home. running away for good. let me put it this way. if i pulled the trigger , do u think even anyone would notice?