Emotional Defecation
I call this entry the above because I am literally "dumping" everything off of my shoulders/out of my mind and into the metaphorical toilet that is the internet. Enjoy my shit haha.
- Last Wednesday one of my closest friends at work was fired. I could understand if it was for a legitimate reason, but it wasn't. I could also understand if she sucked at her job, but she was in fact one of the best hosts we had. The managers made a huge mistake getting rid of her. It makes me so angry. She and I used to hate each other. We never got along. Then one day she gave me a huge talking-to and everything changed. We were really good friends. I'm going to miss her.
- Friday on my way to work, I came so dangerously close to getting into a massive car accident. Some asshole got fed up with being stuck in traffic that he swerved sharply out of his lane...and practically into my passenger side door. If I hadn't been paying attention, I would have had a mercedes riding shotgun. I got into work and could barely make words. I was whiter than a ghost (which is saying a lot for me haha). Gabbi asked me what was wrong and I just burst into tears at the host stand. I had to run out back and cry in a corner of the kitchen. I couldn't stand up, I was shaking uncontrollably, and I was just horrified. Mom came in to check on me and I almost cried again. I have never been so scared.
- Saturday night, as I was chillin at the host stand, Gabbi came out from the kitchen (having finished her shift) and sat with me. Suddenly I notice two uniform shirts in her bag. I asked her what that was for, and she said, "Oh I'm training for takeout on Wednesday." (Note: I have been asking since last year, and again since my new boss arrived, to move on to takeout. I even asked him TUESDAY, and he said "oh, I'l have you start after a classroom in July.") So Gabbi is currently training in takeaway while I am being told "yeah yeah...soon." Don't know what I ever did to deserve this, other than BEND OVER BACKWARDS AND GO ABOVE AND BEYOND MY FUCKING RESPONSIBILITIES FOR THAT RESTAURANT. I don't know why he can't straight up tell me no. It's better than leading me on like this. Plus, at the risk of sounding like a four year old, it really hurts my feelings :(
- Monday/Tuesday Jenn and I went up to Keene. I needed to get away from Outback/life for a night, and, not gonna lie, I needed a good cuddle. From the moment we got there, it wasn't exactly what we were hoping for. We had fun for a little while, especially when Will and John were drunk, but then it got..not as good. I don't wanna get into it because it's more my fault than anyone else's, but suffice it to say that John has not changed. Even after all the "I want to be a better person. I'm sick of being an asshole," talk, it is not true. I started to see a change, I could tell he was really trying to be nicer, but that ended fast. Instead he went right back to his old ways: only hugging me when he was drunk, sleeping with his back to me, and, my personal favorite, rambling about how hysterical it was that he put pool balls into the shape of a swastika and called it "The Third Rack" without noticing how irritated I was. Mmmm he has not the respect. Anita reminded me of Addison's wise words, "He just doesn't get it."
- While cruising around Tuesday, I get a text from my mom saying she was in a car accident. Then I lost service. So I freaked out for a while and then finally got in touch with her. She's physically ok, but mentally a mess. The car's not so bad either. It was a minor thing; she got rear-ended on her way to work. I just feel really badly because she's still shaken up by it. Since Jenn and I weren't really thrilled with being there, we left early enough that I could go be with her.
- Last night I found out that Matt Schechter (aka kid from BC I almost dated, who ended up hooking up with Anita after hooking up with me)'s girlfriend passed away. It was kind of a weird moment. I mean, I'm not the biggest fan of Matt because of the past, but I would never wish anything this horrific on him. It was kind of a numbing experience. It was also the last thing my emotions could handle. I cried a lot last night.