(no subject)
as of right now, I'm single. We're taking a break. Not a "we can see other people break", but a "we're not seeing eachother" break. in a month we're going to reevaluate. outlooks are dim. Especially since I still have to live with him till the end of the month, and that he is obviously repulsed by me.
in other words, I've fucked up everything in my life again. Once again, I fell in love with the wrong person, once again, I fucked up my future. Why I left Vermont, why I gave up my whole life, why I did everything was all me being foolish enough to believe that someone can actually love ME. all of me.
I've never been more disapointed in myself than I am now. I've never felt more lost than I am now. I've never felt more empty and alone than I do now.
I have nothing.
again.
in other words, I've fucked up everything in my life again. Once again, I fell in love with the wrong person, once again, I fucked up my future. Why I left Vermont, why I gave up my whole life, why I did everything was all me being foolish enough to believe that someone can actually love ME. all of me.
I've never been more disapointed in myself than I am now. I've never felt more lost than I am now. I've never felt more empty and alone than I do now.
I have nothing.
again.