got you down and dirty
I almost didn't run the Filthy Four race this year. I was wavering about whether I would go out all the way up to the point where I was lying in bed at o'dark-thirty and would need to get up in 10 minutes if I was going. It was super cold (18F at 7am), my toe's been bothering me lately, I haven't done nearly enough running recently and was underprepared, I still haven't gotten any of my friends to join me, and, well, hills suck. And the bed was warm and cozy.
I finally decided that if I didn't go, I'd regret not even trying, and if I did go and things got to be too much, I could always stop part way and come home. So I went, and I did it. This year there were more overall runners (31, up from 24) and more women (5, up from 3), and once again I firmly secured my last place but got one point per hill because I ran them all, dammit. Overall I don't think I created any new injuries which is great, although my knees were pretty unhappy with the downhills and are still quite tender.
I am glad I ran, and I'm glad it's done, and I realized afterwards that this was pretty much the last big thing I was working for this year. It's quite freeing to be done. I also realized that I need to fail more often. Or give myself the chance to fail. To quit. To try something that's too much and not be able to do it and just deal with it. Because I'm much more likely to not try at all. It's much safer and less scary that way. Which is not the person I want to be.
I finally decided that if I didn't go, I'd regret not even trying, and if I did go and things got to be too much, I could always stop part way and come home. So I went, and I did it. This year there were more overall runners (31, up from 24) and more women (5, up from 3), and once again I firmly secured my last place but got one point per hill because I ran them all, dammit. Overall I don't think I created any new injuries which is great, although my knees were pretty unhappy with the downhills and are still quite tender.
I am glad I ran, and I'm glad it's done, and I realized afterwards that this was pretty much the last big thing I was working for this year. It's quite freeing to be done. I also realized that I need to fail more often. Or give myself the chance to fail. To quit. To try something that's too much and not be able to do it and just deal with it. Because I'm much more likely to not try at all. It's much safer and less scary that way. Which is not the person I want to be.