Been a long. LONG. time.
Today is Halloween. Like most, I was excited, now I'm just emotionally drained. I've attempted to throw a party last night, but only two people of the twenty I had invited ever showed. One of which could only stay for ten minutes.
Needless to say, I'm very upset with the outcome. not even my closest friends arrived.
I'm not on the verge of tears as I am on the verge of sleeping for the rest of the weekend. my depression is not taking this disappointment easy. My body is sore, and my emotions muted on the outside. I don't want to act like this, but I can't just snap out of it. I'm not wonder woman after all.
Maybe someday, in some near or distant future, I'll finally be able to throw a proper party. One where I don't end up disappointed and feeling like a waste of space and time.
Now it's time to sleep for the night. Exhaustion has already settled deep into my bones and makes me ache. Perhaps I'll find peace in my sleep.