LYDIA<33333333333333333333
aww lydia i love you.
i love that we know what to say,
what the other wants to hear.
and we don't try to cross any boundaries in the name of comfort,
as ironic as that is.
i love that we pick on each other
but only about the things we know won't kill the other person inside.
the kind of laughter we know is humbling and honest and genuine
and we will never forget how to be children or
the importance of laughing at yourself.
and we know how to leave well enough alone.
i can't even ever ever ever begin to express the appreciation i have
for the fact that you never lost faith in me.
and things are out in the open,
and we both know that there have been times we bitch about each other.
and you get irritated and agitated and confused and frustrated.
and there are things that we don't like about each other
like that i inhale sticks of tobacco with menthol-y goodness.
and the stability in friendship that i crave
i find it in you and it's wonderful.
you still answered the phone and listened to me
when i was tweaked out of my mind and couldn't stop rambling.
my sentences were incoherant, i talked too fast but i didn't really say anything.
i was falling apart, on the inside and out,
i was dying and unstable and untrustworthy,
and i was ridiculously immersed in my own world of
denial and lies and deception and debt and destruction.
but you still answered your phone
and took the time to try to decipher what i was trying to say
and took the time to figure out what i needed to hear.
and you take the permanent flaws that decorate me
and you take them in stride.
you accept them and work with them
and you know that the defective aspects of me
are not only mistakes but also a part of me.
i love that we both can make the other understand
that things will get better and
there will be a time when we both don't cry like we do now.
there will come a point in time when the tears that prick
at the rims of our eyes don't leak like they constantly seem to these days.
and we will be strong again.
i love that even though other inside jokes lose their entertainment value over time
that ours never really do.
the bobble-head birds and the sick monkeys, the trailor and the mom and jesus fish
mary and her tire, horrible names like BUBBACITA, that kid and his korean rap,
the picture i took of the girl with the weird boots
and that other girl with the table doily with the beads,
naming paint and coveting paint chips,
DFOYB Day, robert in a towel and they wouldn't let us sit in the van,
bloo! and too much fish and chips, backyard barbeque man,
the sopranos reject (did i tell you he came into big 5 and looked at sunglasses??),
the crazy lady on a fitness equipment destruction warpath and her teeth,
and your crazy watch that didn't come with instructions.
boy this turned out longer than i meant it to.
but you mean that much.
i love that we know what to say,
what the other wants to hear.
and we don't try to cross any boundaries in the name of comfort,
as ironic as that is.
i love that we pick on each other
but only about the things we know won't kill the other person inside.
the kind of laughter we know is humbling and honest and genuine
and we will never forget how to be children or
the importance of laughing at yourself.
and we know how to leave well enough alone.
i can't even ever ever ever begin to express the appreciation i have
for the fact that you never lost faith in me.
and things are out in the open,
and we both know that there have been times we bitch about each other.
and you get irritated and agitated and confused and frustrated.
and there are things that we don't like about each other
like that i inhale sticks of tobacco with menthol-y goodness.
and the stability in friendship that i crave
i find it in you and it's wonderful.
you still answered the phone and listened to me
when i was tweaked out of my mind and couldn't stop rambling.
my sentences were incoherant, i talked too fast but i didn't really say anything.
i was falling apart, on the inside and out,
i was dying and unstable and untrustworthy,
and i was ridiculously immersed in my own world of
denial and lies and deception and debt and destruction.
but you still answered your phone
and took the time to try to decipher what i was trying to say
and took the time to figure out what i needed to hear.
and you take the permanent flaws that decorate me
and you take them in stride.
you accept them and work with them
and you know that the defective aspects of me
are not only mistakes but also a part of me.
i love that we both can make the other understand
that things will get better and
there will be a time when we both don't cry like we do now.
there will come a point in time when the tears that prick
at the rims of our eyes don't leak like they constantly seem to these days.
and we will be strong again.
i love that even though other inside jokes lose their entertainment value over time
that ours never really do.
the bobble-head birds and the sick monkeys, the trailor and the mom and jesus fish
mary and her tire, horrible names like BUBBACITA, that kid and his korean rap,
the picture i took of the girl with the weird boots
and that other girl with the table doily with the beads,
naming paint and coveting paint chips,
DFOYB Day, robert in a towel and they wouldn't let us sit in the van,
bloo! and too much fish and chips, backyard barbeque man,
the sopranos reject (did i tell you he came into big 5 and looked at sunglasses??),
the crazy lady on a fitness equipment destruction warpath and her teeth,
and your crazy watch that didn't come with instructions.
boy this turned out longer than i meant it to.
but you mean that much.