Insomnia... A New Dream
I can't get no sleep... My fight with the shadows is one that is never ending... i have invited a shadow into my soul where is eats away at the only strength that i have left to my name... my honor... i can not vanquish this shadow for i have invited it in... and we all know that once you invite something into your life... it will not go without a fight... i know not what to do with this fight... it is one that i can not win alone... i feel so weak... it eats at the only thing that i hold dear to me... why must i submit myself to this... why did i allow this beast to enter my soul and torment me as it please... was it an act of weakness? was it because i was fooled by the shadows appearance? why? there is no clear answer to this question but i must find a way to vanqish this beast from my body... i can not live much longer with this pain... i must keep moving... i must keep fighting... i must live... i have not been able to love like i once did... and i wish only for more one more time to feel this feeling of love... i wish to let it all go again and allow my light to lead the way... i wish only to put full faith in the light... but... i know if i do this... i may be lost like the first of it's kind.... i know that if i allow myself to be consumed by the lights powers that i will no longer have control over my own choices... i will allow them to rest solely on the will of the light... for the light gives me the power to fight any foe of darkness... with the light, the realm of shadows is but a play ground for me... where i can defeat any foe that adventures to close... yes... this is what i must do... i must find this light that will show me the way... this light will be the one to understand me and grow with me as the last... i have learned for all the lights that i journeyed with them and with this knowledge i can make sure that i can protect myself and at the same time allow myself to absorbe the wonderess glow of it's glory... yes... i must search... i must do something... i can not take this pain in my heart much longer... so i set off on my search for another light that will show me the way to true power... true passion... true love... i search for i know this is the only cure... i must find it... this light will show me the way... i know it... as night turns to day and day to night i continue searching... i've walked as far as my feet can take me and yet still nothing... why can i not find what i yern for... why can i not find my cure... why?!?!?!... i feel so lost... i feel as there is no reason to fight any more... my bones are tired of fighting this darkness.. without the strength of the light my body is but a frail thing... an empty shell... a vesle for ones own perpuse... my eyes are heavy again... i can't give up yet... i must keep searching... the darkness in my soul is to much for me to bear... i must keep searching so i can vanquish this pain in my heart... all i want is love... all i want is a light to show me the way... my body collapes on the floor... my vision is fading... i can see the shadows approach... i can fight no longer... they can have my body and do as they please... i can no longer fight this battle of the gods... before my world blacks out i can see the shadows hold... they do not attack me... why can't they just end my pain... are they taunting me? are they planning on ways to torment and destroy my soul? no... that can't be... they should of acted by now... but there they are... afraid... but why... why would they be afraid of a weaken soul? why would they not end this pain in my chest?... what's this? they are backing away... why? why do they fear me? why are the backing away? i do not understand... is this another one of there tricks? is this another one of there games? why... ... ... my eyes shut and i can see no more... i only await the shadows... but they still do not come... my body feels light now... i feel as a feather on the wind... i feel no pain... but i still don't understand... why is my pain gone... in the world of the shadows there is always pain... but i feel nothing... what could this mean... i have not the strength to open my eyes... i allow my feelings of weightlessness to control my every more... i feel peaceful... ... ... my body feels warm again... where am i? am i dreaming... no this is not good... i am not allow to dream... my dreams allow me to be open to attacks... but yet i feel as if i am protected... if this is a dream then who is protecting me... where are the shadow that invade my realm! my body jerks up and stands at gaurd... i open my eyes only to fassen them shut... my eyes are blinded by light... light... my eyes... they are blinded by light! where has this light come from? how did it know i was in need? why did it save me from the shadows... i need to ask why! why would a light that i didn't know was there help a weaken soul! why!... i am able to open my eyes again but still this light is so powerful! this is simply amazing... this light could destroy half the shadow world if it wanted... i kneel before the light and inquire as to why it helped me... over the years i have learn to speak the word of the light and understand the way they act... the light responds "i have always been there... in the distance... watching... protecting... when i can... but i wished not to alarm you... my powers are bound... and with those bounds i can only do so much to help out a weaken soul... i inquire... but why are you able to help me now... the bonds are weakening... my powers are becoming my own again... i do with them as i please... but why me i ask... like i've said before... i've always been there... watching... waiting... i've always tryed to help where i could... but then was a time where i was weak and only could do so much of my own acord... i see... i bow my head and ask the light... "will you acompany me on my journy?" "i ask not for you to break you bonds unless you must... but do you have the strength to lend me while i walk my path?" the light dims abit and i can see that i am no longer in the same area as before... this is a new land... not of the old light nor the realm of shadows... this light was able to transport me to a different realm... the light looks at me and acknowledges my request... i am greatful to the light for it has shown me the way... but will this light dim and fade away? and that's why i can't get no sleep... for the path is new and unbeaten and i have to much exploring to do to sleep.