depressed
Why is it that i feel the way i do sometimes... yesterday i felt like i was the only one in my world... like there was nothing there to keep my grounded... no reason to be or do... i felt like shit... i don't understand it sometimes... i look around and see everyone else and see how there doing in there life and how life is for them and i want that.... i want to be happy again without having to think all the times.... i want to be able to just say "who cares" and " it's ok", but i can't... i have to many strings attached... i just want to cut them all and say fuck the world... but then what... i'll have nothing supporting me... i'd fall and drop on my ass and shatter into a million little bits... i know what your going to say... you need to support yourself... you don't think i know that.... i've been doing that for awhile now... i just want someone who will be there with me and made me happy... i'm tired of being alone in this world...
one time long long ago i had a girlfriend that cared and said she loved me and would do anything for me...
one time long long ago i had a friend who would kill himself if it ment saving me....
one time ago i had a mother who was the isperation for my loving heart and caring eyes...
one time long long ago...
but that was then... and this is now... you can't have everything... but to have nothing is just to painful sometimes... i don't have too many ties in this world right now and i've been thinking about the days long ago before the mental hospital thing and it keeps me thinking...
well your mostlikely saying "hey you got promoted at your job, that's something to live for"... ya it's nice to be in a higher spot but for what... what's the point of being in charge of something when there's no one who you can really share it with... i'm going to be making more money but for what... i'm not going to spend it on myself... i mean i'll spend what i need for what i need to pay but other then that... what....
I'm going to stop rambaling being i get myself in trouble...
later
one time long long ago i had a girlfriend that cared and said she loved me and would do anything for me...
one time long long ago i had a friend who would kill himself if it ment saving me....
one time ago i had a mother who was the isperation for my loving heart and caring eyes...
one time long long ago...
but that was then... and this is now... you can't have everything... but to have nothing is just to painful sometimes... i don't have too many ties in this world right now and i've been thinking about the days long ago before the mental hospital thing and it keeps me thinking...
well your mostlikely saying "hey you got promoted at your job, that's something to live for"... ya it's nice to be in a higher spot but for what... what's the point of being in charge of something when there's no one who you can really share it with... i'm going to be making more money but for what... i'm not going to spend it on myself... i mean i'll spend what i need for what i need to pay but other then that... what....
I'm going to stop rambaling being i get myself in trouble...
later