(no subject)
I think I'm going to start updating once in awhile...I know, I've said that before but I'm bored on the internet. I need to vent a little...
Andrew has broken up with me...it's been really hard, and I wish everyday it didn't happen. He did this because he said he has too many priorites...he just started a job that does keep him busy. It really hurts because of all our plans, his promises, just everything that came out of his mouth I believed would happen. I probably just believed him because I thought he was so great, I still do, any girl would be lucky to have him. I couldn't stop crying the first few days after the breakup, and once in awhile I get teary eyed but I say to myself "stop it Lauren...he doesn't deserve those tears."
Now, I feel like I've lost everything...I didn't hang out with any of my friends when we were dating, I always wanted to be with him.
All I wish we could have done was talk it through instead of him calling me and saying that he's stressed and has sooo many prioities and then dumps me...it was so sudden...unbelievable...it makes me think if he was using me.
Why would you do that to someone that was just telling you she loves you? And that you love her back?
I asked him if it was ok if I still loved him...he said "I don't know" that was 2 days ago and we haven't had a real conversation then.
He said he still wanted to be good friends, and that he wouldn't dump me like I'm trash, but I really do feel like he has...
I drove past his house the night after our breakup to see if he was home because no one was answering the phone. When I drove further up his street I saw a guy and a girl walking a dog...I relized that was Andrew.
I got sooo mad and started balling...he said he has no time for me, but for some other girl? I don't understand why he did this.
I finally walked up to his door and knocked. He came out the other side of the house to get me. I was standing there, in the dark, shaking...with tears. I said "I'm sorry, I just need to know when we can talk..." He said tomorrow. He told me about the girl that was in there...shes in Scouts just like him. "Oh perfect" I thought, "someone just like him, of course they are "hanging out"" He told me nothing was going on. He got close to me and started rubbing my arms to make me stop shaking...all I wanted to do is just crawl into his arms and have him say he loves me. I wanted to feel like I was the only one that mattered to him again. But I couldn't. Instead I cryed. He kept telling me to stop.
He's been saying we are going to hang out sometime...whenever that will be. I would love it when it happens. I never thought this day would come...I just wish I could go to sleep at night. And I wish everything wouldn't remind me of him.
Andrew has broken up with me...it's been really hard, and I wish everyday it didn't happen. He did this because he said he has too many priorites...he just started a job that does keep him busy. It really hurts because of all our plans, his promises, just everything that came out of his mouth I believed would happen. I probably just believed him because I thought he was so great, I still do, any girl would be lucky to have him. I couldn't stop crying the first few days after the breakup, and once in awhile I get teary eyed but I say to myself "stop it Lauren...he doesn't deserve those tears."
Now, I feel like I've lost everything...I didn't hang out with any of my friends when we were dating, I always wanted to be with him.
All I wish we could have done was talk it through instead of him calling me and saying that he's stressed and has sooo many prioities and then dumps me...it was so sudden...unbelievable...it makes me think if he was using me.
Why would you do that to someone that was just telling you she loves you? And that you love her back?
I asked him if it was ok if I still loved him...he said "I don't know" that was 2 days ago and we haven't had a real conversation then.
He said he still wanted to be good friends, and that he wouldn't dump me like I'm trash, but I really do feel like he has...
I drove past his house the night after our breakup to see if he was home because no one was answering the phone. When I drove further up his street I saw a guy and a girl walking a dog...I relized that was Andrew.
I got sooo mad and started balling...he said he has no time for me, but for some other girl? I don't understand why he did this.
I finally walked up to his door and knocked. He came out the other side of the house to get me. I was standing there, in the dark, shaking...with tears. I said "I'm sorry, I just need to know when we can talk..." He said tomorrow. He told me about the girl that was in there...shes in Scouts just like him. "Oh perfect" I thought, "someone just like him, of course they are "hanging out"" He told me nothing was going on. He got close to me and started rubbing my arms to make me stop shaking...all I wanted to do is just crawl into his arms and have him say he loves me. I wanted to feel like I was the only one that mattered to him again. But I couldn't. Instead I cryed. He kept telling me to stop.
He's been saying we are going to hang out sometime...whenever that will be. I would love it when it happens. I never thought this day would come...I just wish I could go to sleep at night. And I wish everything wouldn't remind me of him.