thx louie!
Rules that guys wish girls knew:
1. If you think you are fat, you probably are. Don't ask us, because we know what will happen if we answer truthfully.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat. If it is up, put it down.
3. Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. one of the reasons men fear marriage is that the women will cut their hair, and you are stuck with her.
4. Birthdays, Valentine's Day and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present.
5. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
6. Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it.
7. Do not ask us what we are thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss navel lint, the shotgun formation or monster trucks.
8. Sundays equals sports. It is like the full moon and the changing of the tides, so let it be. Shopping is not a sport, and never will be.
9. When we have to go somewhere, anything you want to wear is fine. Really.
10. You have enough clothes.
11. You have too many shoes.
12. Crying is blackmail.
13. Your ex-boyfriend is an idiot.
14. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work. Strong hints don't work. Obvious hints don't work. Just say it.
15. No, we don't know what day it is. Mark anniversaries on the calendar so that we can see them.
16. Yes, peeing standing up is more difficult, and we are bound to miss sometimes.
17. Most guys own three pairs of shoes. What makes you think we would be any good at picking which pair of 30 looks good with your dress?
18. Yes and no are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
19. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. Sympathy is what your girlfriends do.
20. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
21. Foreign films are best left to foreigners.
22. The oil lamp in the car is important. Check your oil.
23. Do not fake it. We would rather be ineffective than deceived.
24. It is neither in your best interest or ours to take the quiz together.
25. No, it doesn't matter which quiz.
26. Anything we said six months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All comments are null and void after seven days.
27. If you won't dress like the Victoria 's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.
28. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
29. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway, it's genetic.
30. Ask us to do something, or tell us how you want it done, but don't do both.
31. Whenever possible, say what you have to say during commercials.
32. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and we don't either.
33. Women wearing wonderbras and low-cut blouses lose the right to complain about having their boobs stared at.
34. More women should wear wonderbras and low-cut blouses. We like staring at boobs.
35. The relationship is never going to be like the first two months we were going out. Get over it.
36. All men see in only 16 colors. Pumpkin is not a color. Neither is peach. Peach is a fruit.
37. If it itches, it will be scratched.
38. if it is our house, I don't understand why my stuff gets thrown in the attic or the basement.
39. We are not mind readers and never will be. Our lack of mind reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.
40. If we ask what is wrong, and you say "Nothing.", we will act like nothing is wrong.
41. We know you are lying, but it isn't worth the hassle.
42. What the hell is a doily?
im going to print this up and draw an "x" and a line on the bottom and hand it to every girl i go out with as a "terms of agreement"!! lol... jk
1. If you think you are fat, you probably are. Don't ask us, because we know what will happen if we answer truthfully.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat. If it is up, put it down.
3. Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. one of the reasons men fear marriage is that the women will cut their hair, and you are stuck with her.
4. Birthdays, Valentine's Day and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present.
5. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
6. Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it.
7. Do not ask us what we are thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss navel lint, the shotgun formation or monster trucks.
8. Sundays equals sports. It is like the full moon and the changing of the tides, so let it be. Shopping is not a sport, and never will be.
9. When we have to go somewhere, anything you want to wear is fine. Really.
10. You have enough clothes.
11. You have too many shoes.
12. Crying is blackmail.
13. Your ex-boyfriend is an idiot.
14. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work. Strong hints don't work. Obvious hints don't work. Just say it.
15. No, we don't know what day it is. Mark anniversaries on the calendar so that we can see them.
16. Yes, peeing standing up is more difficult, and we are bound to miss sometimes.
17. Most guys own three pairs of shoes. What makes you think we would be any good at picking which pair of 30 looks good with your dress?
18. Yes and no are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
19. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. Sympathy is what your girlfriends do.
20. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
21. Foreign films are best left to foreigners.
22. The oil lamp in the car is important. Check your oil.
23. Do not fake it. We would rather be ineffective than deceived.
24. It is neither in your best interest or ours to take the quiz together.
25. No, it doesn't matter which quiz.
26. Anything we said six months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All comments are null and void after seven days.
27. If you won't dress like the Victoria 's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.
28. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
29. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway, it's genetic.
30. Ask us to do something, or tell us how you want it done, but don't do both.
31. Whenever possible, say what you have to say during commercials.
32. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and we don't either.
33. Women wearing wonderbras and low-cut blouses lose the right to complain about having their boobs stared at.
34. More women should wear wonderbras and low-cut blouses. We like staring at boobs.
35. The relationship is never going to be like the first two months we were going out. Get over it.
36. All men see in only 16 colors. Pumpkin is not a color. Neither is peach. Peach is a fruit.
37. If it itches, it will be scratched.
38. if it is our house, I don't understand why my stuff gets thrown in the attic or the basement.
39. We are not mind readers and never will be. Our lack of mind reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.
40. If we ask what is wrong, and you say "Nothing.", we will act like nothing is wrong.
41. We know you are lying, but it isn't worth the hassle.
42. What the hell is a doily?
im going to print this up and draw an "x" and a line on the bottom and hand it to every girl i go out with as a "terms of agreement"!! lol... jk