the snows coming down, im watching it fall...
so i am sitting here in my pjs (currently sweatpants and a hoodie since we dont have radiators :( ) and listening to dustin kensrue's christmas album (thanks dane!!) and once again, its christmas time.
i try to give it a chance every year, but i still dont really get what everyone is so in love with christmas over. i have come to the conclusion, that i will love christmas when i have kids of my own, and i am greatly looking forward to that. but currently, its way more of a hassle than warm, fuzzy happiness. since i do not have a family of my own, i will drive to 4-5 different places on christmas day, seeing a maximum amount of people in minimum amounts of time. this does not equal fun. (esp since i'm driving, i cant even enjoy christmas ale on christmas. unfair.)
i will most certainly receive random gifts from people that i dont like, just because its routine. ill thank them, and probably leave them at moms for her use. ill see people i see once a year, and really dont think about between that time. ill try to fit doing 398, 398 things into my week at home while also trying to relax since it is the only vacation ill get for a while. ill sleep in every day and then get mad at myself for it because of the time change and the electric blanket on my bed at dads. its all been done before.
i would enjoy christmas more if it actually was about giving things to the ones you love because you want them to be happy and because it reminded them of you. or if i had one place to go, and it was the only place i wanted to be, and surrounded with everyone i want to be with (which this will happen later at bry's house, but it's a long day before then). i would enjoy it more if people were more joyous, and forgiving in general and christmas dinner wasnt filled with grudges between family members (and parents). if robberies and crimes didn't go up around the holidays. if it really was about the giving spirit.
but, once again this year, i am a realist, and an overwhelmed one at that.
i love love love my friends and family and dont know what i would ever do without them, yet id rather celebrate them every day instead of once a year. the people in my life rule. but trying to see them all in one day, is, well, dumb. and its flipping cold out.
xoxo.
i try to give it a chance every year, but i still dont really get what everyone is so in love with christmas over. i have come to the conclusion, that i will love christmas when i have kids of my own, and i am greatly looking forward to that. but currently, its way more of a hassle than warm, fuzzy happiness. since i do not have a family of my own, i will drive to 4-5 different places on christmas day, seeing a maximum amount of people in minimum amounts of time. this does not equal fun. (esp since i'm driving, i cant even enjoy christmas ale on christmas. unfair.)
i will most certainly receive random gifts from people that i dont like, just because its routine. ill thank them, and probably leave them at moms for her use. ill see people i see once a year, and really dont think about between that time. ill try to fit doing 398, 398 things into my week at home while also trying to relax since it is the only vacation ill get for a while. ill sleep in every day and then get mad at myself for it because of the time change and the electric blanket on my bed at dads. its all been done before.
i would enjoy christmas more if it actually was about giving things to the ones you love because you want them to be happy and because it reminded them of you. or if i had one place to go, and it was the only place i wanted to be, and surrounded with everyone i want to be with (which this will happen later at bry's house, but it's a long day before then). i would enjoy it more if people were more joyous, and forgiving in general and christmas dinner wasnt filled with grudges between family members (and parents). if robberies and crimes didn't go up around the holidays. if it really was about the giving spirit.
but, once again this year, i am a realist, and an overwhelmed one at that.
i love love love my friends and family and dont know what i would ever do without them, yet id rather celebrate them every day instead of once a year. the people in my life rule. but trying to see them all in one day, is, well, dumb. and its flipping cold out.
xoxo.