(no subject)
Title: Such a child
Word Count: 1785
Characters: The Doctor (all ten of them), Susan, Jamie, Sarah Jane, Romana II, Tegan, Peri, Ace, Rose, Donna.
Rating: G
Genre: Crack, lots of it.
Warning: Silly Doctor is Silly, not really a warning but there you have it.
Disclaimer: The Doctor Who characters aren't mine, don't sue! Or sue, but you won't get a damn thing out of me. My butt is poor.
Unbeta'ed, sorry for any mistakes.
Authors Ramble: This was something that came to mind while talking with fading-xhopex, so really this crack isn't just my fault. The main prank was actually her idea, since i hadn't even heard of it until she told me about it.
Also One and Eight have the shortest bits because those are the two Doctor's i'm least familiar with, hopefully i didn't destroy them too much.
Summary: When Donna goes shopping, Ten gets VERY bored. Which is never a good thing.
ONE
"I say Grandfather, i haven't seen it." Susan assured the stern man as he walked around the console room.
"Well it didn't just walk away, now did it child."
"No, i suppose not." She replied, as she went back to looking for the panama hat that had gone missing. "Perhaps if we re-trace our steps we can find it?" She offered.
The idea of re-tracing their travels did not thrill the Doctor, but to be fair nothing really thrilled the elderly man.
"Very well." He said, moving to the console and flicking one of the levers to start the TARDIS in motion. Only the TARDIS didn't move, instead both people placed their hands over their ears suddenly.
"Grandfather, what's that!?" Susan almost shouted, trying to speak over the loud noise in the ship.
"I've no idea!" The Doctor replied, as he attempted to shut it off.
TWO
"Are you sure you haven't seen it?" Came a muffled voice from under the TARDIS console, a pair of legs in over sized pants sticking out from it.
"Honestly Doctor, i've no idea where it is." Said the Scottish man, who stood by the Doctor's legs.
"Well i'm just confused, where could have that blasted recorder gotten too?" The Doctor said as he sat up, brushing off his large clothing.
"I'm not sure, but why were you looking for it under the console?" Jamie asked, not understanding the Doctor's actions, as usual.
"Well i had looked everywhere else." The Doctor said simply, standing up and fiddling with one of the controls. The moment it was touched, loud noise started echoing through the TARDIS.
"Doctor!" Jamie called, placing his hands on his ears. "What is that?"
"Music i'd wadger." The Doctor said, looking at the TARDIS console in question. "Where did that come from?"
THREE
"Doctor calm down, please." Sarah Jane urged as she followed the Doctor into the TARDIS.
"I not calming down, this is an outrage!" He said loudly once they were inside the ship again.
"Doctor, it's just a bit of paint." She offered lamely.
"It's quite a lot more than a 'bit' Sarah Jane, she's blue. Bessie is blue! Who would do such a thing, blue is a terrible color for a car."
"Blue is a perfectly fine color for a car."
"Not for Bessie!" He said.
"I'm sorry Doctor, i'm sure we can fix it."
"Of course we can, i'm going back and see who did it."
Sarah Jane looked confused for a moment. "I thought crossing your own timeline was wrong." She said.
"Well i don't intend on changing anything, i just want to go back to see who did it. So i can find the scoundrel and make him clean up that mess now." And with that the Doctor flipped a switch on the TARDIS's console, but instead of taking off, loud music echoed in the room.
"What is that!?" The Doctor said loudly, trying to turn off the noise as Sarah Jane stood next to him with her hands over her ears. Trying to block out the painfully loud music.
FOUR
"Romana!" The Doctor called out for his companion as he stood next to the coat rack, digging through the pockets of his coat.
"What is it?" Romana asked as she walked into the control room, K9 following closely behind.
"Have you seen my jelly babies?" He asked, not turning to face her.
"Your what?"
"Jelly babies." He repeated, finally facing her.
"No." She said simply, shrugging her shoulders.
"Really, you've taken them before." He pointed a finger at her.
"Well, i didn't this time." She said.
"Where could they have gone?" He muttered to himself, going over to the console and flicking a switch which only caused extremely loud music to resonate throughout the TARDIS.
"Oh, that's horrible." Romana said loudly, cringing at the noise.
"What is that?" The Doctor asked, looking around the room.
"Master, it it music." K9 replied to the Doctor's question.
"Shut up K9." The Doctor said flippantly.
"Well, whatever it is would you shut it off!" Romana said.
FIVE
"Doctor?" Tegan piped up as she walked next to the Doctor toward the parked TARDIS.
"Yes?" He asked.
"There's something different about you." She mused.
The Doctor paused, looking down at himself then looking back up at Tegan. "There is?"
"Yes, something's.... off." She said quizzically, looking the Doctor over.
"I feel fine." He assured her, as they entered the TARDIS.
The Doctor walked over to the console and was about the hit one of the many switches when Tegan suddenly exclaimed. "I know!"
"What?" The Doctor asked, looking up at her.
"You're celery is gone." She said.
"Really!?" The Time Lord looked down at his lapel and saw that his decorative vegetable was in fact gone. "I wonder where it could have gotten too." He said, looking up at Tegan puzzled.
The woman just shook her head, not knowing where it could have went.
"Well, i'll just have to pick up another won't i." He smiled, flipping a lever on the TARDIS console.
"My god!" Tegan shouted over the loud music that was booming throughout the TARDIS. "What did you do?" She asked to Doctor.
"I didn't do anything." He assured, quickly fiddling with the dials on the control trying to cut the sound off.
SIX
"Where is it?"
"Like i would take your jacket." Peri said, placing her hands on her hips.
"Well i can't find it."
"And that's my fault?" The woman asked, arching her eyebrows.
"Well it couldn't have just gotten up and walked away." The Doctor said, shaking his head.
"You probably misplaced it, it's not like anyone would want to steal that jacket."
"And what's wrong with my jacket?"
"It's a little abrasive Doctor." She said, smirking.
The Doctor glared at her slightly for making fun of his colorful coat, before flipping a switch on the TARDIS control console. The large ship was suddenly filled with loud music, as both people clamped hands over their ears.
"What happened!?" Peri shouted over the noise.
"I don't know!" The Doctor replied just as loudly.
SEVEN
"That's not possible, i couldn't have lost it!" The Doctor said in an offended tone.
"Well i didn't say you lost it on purpose." Ace said, as she leaned against one of walls in the TARDIS's control room.
"I didn't lose it." The Doctor insisted.
"Hey, whatever. It's your umbrella." She shrugged.
"Someone must have stolen it."
"Who would steal an umbrella?" She asked.
"I don't know." The Doctor shook his head in disbelief, of all the things to lose.
"Well we could just go back and look for it." Ace offered, they had only just left the alien planet they had been on.
"Perhaps." The Doctor paused. "Yes, alright." And with that he fiddled with a dial on the TARDIS's console, only to have the room fill with loud music. "What in Rassilon's name is that!?"
Ace who had her hands over her ears, laughed suddenly. "No way." She said.
"What?"
"I know this song!" She said.
"Song? This isn't music, this is noise!" The Doctor shouted loudly over the music.
Eight
"Where could it be?" The Doctor muttered to himself aa he was picking through his large console room, the place was in disarray as he continued searching for something. Straighting up again, he stood looking around.
"I can't have lost it." He said to the large empty ship, which in turn just hummed.
Touching the bare collar of his white shirt, he muttered to himself again. "Where could that neck scarf have gotten too."
Shaking his head, he walked over to the TARDIS's console and proceeded to flip a dial on it. Only instead of the TARDIS taking off, loud music blasted through the room.
"Oh that's horrid!" The Doctor said, quickly running around the console trying to turn the loud music off. Which proved to be more of a task than he had thought it would be.
NINE
As the Doctor and Rose walked into the TARDIS they both paused just beyond the door, The Doctor actually making a loud shocked and slightly affronted noise.
"Doctor, what did you do to the TARDIS?" Rose asked from where she stood next to the man, looking around the stalk white room.
"I didn't do anything!" The Doctor said, running up to the console and looking over the controls.
"Then why does it look like this?" Rose asked, walking up to where he was.
"I, i don't know!" He said, looking around with a horrified expression on his face. "Someone must have changed the desktop theme, but that, that's impossible. No one could do that, well expect me."
"Did the TARDIS do it on it's own?" Rose offered, as she inspected the newly arranged white room.
"No, this is just....." He trailed off, looking down at the console shaking his head.
"Can you change it back?"
"Yes." The Doctor said, moving to flip a switch on the console. Which in turn not only didn't fix the theme, it also caused loud music to echo throughout the ship. "Oh, what's that!?" The Doctor said loudly.
Rose laughed. "Rick Astley." She said.
"What?"
"Rick Astley, you know, the singer?" When the Doctor just looked at her oddly, she laughed again. "He sings this song, it's called 'Never Gonna Give You Up'. Doctor, you've just been...."
TEN
"You Rickrolled them?" Donna asked from where she was leaning again the TARDIS's console with her arms crossed over her chest.
"Yes."
"At the same time?"
"Oh yes."
Donna rolled her eyes, chuckling. "All of them? Rickrolled, at the exact same time?"
The Doctor just grinned.
"You are such a child. I can't leave you alone for five minutes, honestly."
"Donna, it wasn't five minutes. It was five hours, really, you and shoe shopping."
"Oi, watch it." She said. "And what are you wearing?" She asked in an amused tone.
The Doctor was standing before her wearing an old feathered panama hat, a horrid multi-colored coat with a piece of celery on the lapel and a silk neck scarf. He was leaning on an umbrella like it was a walking stick, and there seemed to be a recorder sticking out of the pocket of the ugly jacket.
"You don't like?"
"Don't tell me you stole that from yourself."
"I didn't, like you said, all this is mine." He grinned.
"I thought crossing your own timeline was bad."
"It is." He nodded. "Except for cheap tricks."
Donna snorted.
"Jelly baby?" The Doctor held out a paper bag toward her, she laughed taking one from the bag.
"You're mad." She told him with an amused smile.
"Oh yes." He grinned like a fool.
Word Count: 1785
Characters: The Doctor (all ten of them), Susan, Jamie, Sarah Jane, Romana II, Tegan, Peri, Ace, Rose, Donna.
Rating: G
Genre: Crack, lots of it.
Warning: Silly Doctor is Silly, not really a warning but there you have it.
Disclaimer: The Doctor Who characters aren't mine, don't sue! Or sue, but you won't get a damn thing out of me. My butt is poor.
Unbeta'ed, sorry for any mistakes.
Authors Ramble: This was something that came to mind while talking with fading-xhopex, so really this crack isn't just my fault. The main prank was actually her idea, since i hadn't even heard of it until she told me about it.
Also One and Eight have the shortest bits because those are the two Doctor's i'm least familiar with, hopefully i didn't destroy them too much.
Summary: When Donna goes shopping, Ten gets VERY bored. Which is never a good thing.
ONE
"I say Grandfather, i haven't seen it." Susan assured the stern man as he walked around the console room.
"Well it didn't just walk away, now did it child."
"No, i suppose not." She replied, as she went back to looking for the panama hat that had gone missing. "Perhaps if we re-trace our steps we can find it?" She offered.
The idea of re-tracing their travels did not thrill the Doctor, but to be fair nothing really thrilled the elderly man.
"Very well." He said, moving to the console and flicking one of the levers to start the TARDIS in motion. Only the TARDIS didn't move, instead both people placed their hands over their ears suddenly.
"Grandfather, what's that!?" Susan almost shouted, trying to speak over the loud noise in the ship.
"I've no idea!" The Doctor replied, as he attempted to shut it off.
TWO
"Are you sure you haven't seen it?" Came a muffled voice from under the TARDIS console, a pair of legs in over sized pants sticking out from it.
"Honestly Doctor, i've no idea where it is." Said the Scottish man, who stood by the Doctor's legs.
"Well i'm just confused, where could have that blasted recorder gotten too?" The Doctor said as he sat up, brushing off his large clothing.
"I'm not sure, but why were you looking for it under the console?" Jamie asked, not understanding the Doctor's actions, as usual.
"Well i had looked everywhere else." The Doctor said simply, standing up and fiddling with one of the controls. The moment it was touched, loud noise started echoing through the TARDIS.
"Doctor!" Jamie called, placing his hands on his ears. "What is that?"
"Music i'd wadger." The Doctor said, looking at the TARDIS console in question. "Where did that come from?"
THREE
"Doctor calm down, please." Sarah Jane urged as she followed the Doctor into the TARDIS.
"I not calming down, this is an outrage!" He said loudly once they were inside the ship again.
"Doctor, it's just a bit of paint." She offered lamely.
"It's quite a lot more than a 'bit' Sarah Jane, she's blue. Bessie is blue! Who would do such a thing, blue is a terrible color for a car."
"Blue is a perfectly fine color for a car."
"Not for Bessie!" He said.
"I'm sorry Doctor, i'm sure we can fix it."
"Of course we can, i'm going back and see who did it."
Sarah Jane looked confused for a moment. "I thought crossing your own timeline was wrong." She said.
"Well i don't intend on changing anything, i just want to go back to see who did it. So i can find the scoundrel and make him clean up that mess now." And with that the Doctor flipped a switch on the TARDIS's console, but instead of taking off, loud music echoed in the room.
"What is that!?" The Doctor said loudly, trying to turn off the noise as Sarah Jane stood next to him with her hands over her ears. Trying to block out the painfully loud music.
FOUR
"Romana!" The Doctor called out for his companion as he stood next to the coat rack, digging through the pockets of his coat.
"What is it?" Romana asked as she walked into the control room, K9 following closely behind.
"Have you seen my jelly babies?" He asked, not turning to face her.
"Your what?"
"Jelly babies." He repeated, finally facing her.
"No." She said simply, shrugging her shoulders.
"Really, you've taken them before." He pointed a finger at her.
"Well, i didn't this time." She said.
"Where could they have gone?" He muttered to himself, going over to the console and flicking a switch which only caused extremely loud music to resonate throughout the TARDIS.
"Oh, that's horrible." Romana said loudly, cringing at the noise.
"What is that?" The Doctor asked, looking around the room.
"Master, it it music." K9 replied to the Doctor's question.
"Shut up K9." The Doctor said flippantly.
"Well, whatever it is would you shut it off!" Romana said.
FIVE
"Doctor?" Tegan piped up as she walked next to the Doctor toward the parked TARDIS.
"Yes?" He asked.
"There's something different about you." She mused.
The Doctor paused, looking down at himself then looking back up at Tegan. "There is?"
"Yes, something's.... off." She said quizzically, looking the Doctor over.
"I feel fine." He assured her, as they entered the TARDIS.
The Doctor walked over to the console and was about the hit one of the many switches when Tegan suddenly exclaimed. "I know!"
"What?" The Doctor asked, looking up at her.
"You're celery is gone." She said.
"Really!?" The Time Lord looked down at his lapel and saw that his decorative vegetable was in fact gone. "I wonder where it could have gotten too." He said, looking up at Tegan puzzled.
The woman just shook her head, not knowing where it could have went.
"Well, i'll just have to pick up another won't i." He smiled, flipping a lever on the TARDIS console.
"My god!" Tegan shouted over the loud music that was booming throughout the TARDIS. "What did you do?" She asked to Doctor.
"I didn't do anything." He assured, quickly fiddling with the dials on the control trying to cut the sound off.
SIX
"Where is it?"
"Like i would take your jacket." Peri said, placing her hands on her hips.
"Well i can't find it."
"And that's my fault?" The woman asked, arching her eyebrows.
"Well it couldn't have just gotten up and walked away." The Doctor said, shaking his head.
"You probably misplaced it, it's not like anyone would want to steal that jacket."
"And what's wrong with my jacket?"
"It's a little abrasive Doctor." She said, smirking.
The Doctor glared at her slightly for making fun of his colorful coat, before flipping a switch on the TARDIS control console. The large ship was suddenly filled with loud music, as both people clamped hands over their ears.
"What happened!?" Peri shouted over the noise.
"I don't know!" The Doctor replied just as loudly.
SEVEN
"That's not possible, i couldn't have lost it!" The Doctor said in an offended tone.
"Well i didn't say you lost it on purpose." Ace said, as she leaned against one of walls in the TARDIS's control room.
"I didn't lose it." The Doctor insisted.
"Hey, whatever. It's your umbrella." She shrugged.
"Someone must have stolen it."
"Who would steal an umbrella?" She asked.
"I don't know." The Doctor shook his head in disbelief, of all the things to lose.
"Well we could just go back and look for it." Ace offered, they had only just left the alien planet they had been on.
"Perhaps." The Doctor paused. "Yes, alright." And with that he fiddled with a dial on the TARDIS's console, only to have the room fill with loud music. "What in Rassilon's name is that!?"
Ace who had her hands over her ears, laughed suddenly. "No way." She said.
"What?"
"I know this song!" She said.
"Song? This isn't music, this is noise!" The Doctor shouted loudly over the music.
Eight
"Where could it be?" The Doctor muttered to himself aa he was picking through his large console room, the place was in disarray as he continued searching for something. Straighting up again, he stood looking around.
"I can't have lost it." He said to the large empty ship, which in turn just hummed.
Touching the bare collar of his white shirt, he muttered to himself again. "Where could that neck scarf have gotten too."
Shaking his head, he walked over to the TARDIS's console and proceeded to flip a dial on it. Only instead of the TARDIS taking off, loud music blasted through the room.
"Oh that's horrid!" The Doctor said, quickly running around the console trying to turn the loud music off. Which proved to be more of a task than he had thought it would be.
NINE
As the Doctor and Rose walked into the TARDIS they both paused just beyond the door, The Doctor actually making a loud shocked and slightly affronted noise.
"Doctor, what did you do to the TARDIS?" Rose asked from where she stood next to the man, looking around the stalk white room.
"I didn't do anything!" The Doctor said, running up to the console and looking over the controls.
"Then why does it look like this?" Rose asked, walking up to where he was.
"I, i don't know!" He said, looking around with a horrified expression on his face. "Someone must have changed the desktop theme, but that, that's impossible. No one could do that, well expect me."
"Did the TARDIS do it on it's own?" Rose offered, as she inspected the newly arranged white room.
"No, this is just....." He trailed off, looking down at the console shaking his head.
"Can you change it back?"
"Yes." The Doctor said, moving to flip a switch on the console. Which in turn not only didn't fix the theme, it also caused loud music to echo throughout the ship. "Oh, what's that!?" The Doctor said loudly.
Rose laughed. "Rick Astley." She said.
"What?"
"Rick Astley, you know, the singer?" When the Doctor just looked at her oddly, she laughed again. "He sings this song, it's called 'Never Gonna Give You Up'. Doctor, you've just been...."
TEN
"You Rickrolled them?" Donna asked from where she was leaning again the TARDIS's console with her arms crossed over her chest.
"Yes."
"At the same time?"
"Oh yes."
Donna rolled her eyes, chuckling. "All of them? Rickrolled, at the exact same time?"
The Doctor just grinned.
"You are such a child. I can't leave you alone for five minutes, honestly."
"Donna, it wasn't five minutes. It was five hours, really, you and shoe shopping."
"Oi, watch it." She said. "And what are you wearing?" She asked in an amused tone.
The Doctor was standing before her wearing an old feathered panama hat, a horrid multi-colored coat with a piece of celery on the lapel and a silk neck scarf. He was leaning on an umbrella like it was a walking stick, and there seemed to be a recorder sticking out of the pocket of the ugly jacket.
"You don't like?"
"Don't tell me you stole that from yourself."
"I didn't, like you said, all this is mine." He grinned.
"I thought crossing your own timeline was bad."
"It is." He nodded. "Except for cheap tricks."
Donna snorted.
"Jelly baby?" The Doctor held out a paper bag toward her, she laughed taking one from the bag.
"You're mad." She told him with an amused smile.
"Oh yes." He grinned like a fool.