Too much for comfort....
Thursday, January 27 2005 2:29am
just been over a week since my last post. lots has and hasnt happened. i spent friday night until wednesday in the house doing absolutly nothing. its also been a very depressing week for me. i cant get over it. this whole navy thing is getting to me. i just wanna run away and never look back. if you think about it, i could do just that with the navy. but i dont want the navy part of it. so anyways like i said, ive been depressed. to top it off sarah called me and said shes rather go to snowcoming with someone else. i dont mind but ya, it just hurt.....A LOT! im not mad or anything like that. or course there are those people here and there that seem to help, but only for awhile. the time i really need people is right about now, early am. everyone is asleep and theres no one to talk to. and lately ive been thinkin if my mom was around that i could go to her...but shes not. in matter of fact if she was here things would be VERY different. god, do i miss her though. i dont think ive missed her this much since she died. on to my dad. ya, i think i now disowned him. i dont want to see or talk to him again. if i do im just gonna cuss him out or something. when my sister talked bout that i told her not to say that but now i think i know where shes coming from. upon seeing this all typed out i think im finally comin outta the denial stage. im done with the depressed stuff now. a bomb shell was dropped again. drew has a girl. thats right. its cool but wierd at the same time. his girl is andys ex. so yeah. lets just say some of us are suprised that drew got one. anywho, theres LOTS more on my mind but i dont wanna dredge through it all and put it onto here, i think i already said too much for comfort so i better stop while im ahead. except for this one last part, i still feel like i cant get too close to women. everytime i do they slip away for one reason or another. well, no more. lates.
-Josh
just been over a week since my last post. lots has and hasnt happened. i spent friday night until wednesday in the house doing absolutly nothing. its also been a very depressing week for me. i cant get over it. this whole navy thing is getting to me. i just wanna run away and never look back. if you think about it, i could do just that with the navy. but i dont want the navy part of it. so anyways like i said, ive been depressed. to top it off sarah called me and said shes rather go to snowcoming with someone else. i dont mind but ya, it just hurt.....A LOT! im not mad or anything like that. or course there are those people here and there that seem to help, but only for awhile. the time i really need people is right about now, early am. everyone is asleep and theres no one to talk to. and lately ive been thinkin if my mom was around that i could go to her...but shes not. in matter of fact if she was here things would be VERY different. god, do i miss her though. i dont think ive missed her this much since she died. on to my dad. ya, i think i now disowned him. i dont want to see or talk to him again. if i do im just gonna cuss him out or something. when my sister talked bout that i told her not to say that but now i think i know where shes coming from. upon seeing this all typed out i think im finally comin outta the denial stage. im done with the depressed stuff now. a bomb shell was dropped again. drew has a girl. thats right. its cool but wierd at the same time. his girl is andys ex. so yeah. lets just say some of us are suprised that drew got one. anywho, theres LOTS more on my mind but i dont wanna dredge through it all and put it onto here, i think i already said too much for comfort so i better stop while im ahead. except for this one last part, i still feel like i cant get too close to women. everytime i do they slip away for one reason or another. well, no more. lates.
-Josh