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[bleedingjezebel]

I want my life to go somewhere, but I don't want to put in the effort to make it go somewhere. I think that I've been especially good at not being caught for my whole life until lately. This last two weeks everything has caught up with me almost. Oh well, I had a good streak anyway. I am lacking a motivation to finish off the year right. I want to

Comments

[oohbarnicles]

why do you hate high school? if you hate people, then dont see/talk to them. you can give up on trying at corona, but its not like you can do that forever. college will be work. and it will be drama. it will be whatever you want it to be depending on the attitude you have and choices you make coming it to it. id say the biggest variable to your college experience will be who you make your friends. who you hang out with. if i would have stuck with jonathan and his buddies, id be a pothead loser with bad grades and no direction. id be doing acid and shrooms every weekend. if i hang out with the genuine people in the honors college, ill be motivated by them and ill be happy and find great guys to have relationships with. those are the kind of friends i want. the ones who have goals and maturity and are so much fun. i was pulling an allnighter last month to write a paper and two friends stuck with me at the library all night to make sure i didnt fall asleep so i could finish it. a while ago, i got drunk out of my mind when i was depressed over jonathan, and jessica and andy marks watched me cry to sleep to make sure i didnt choke on my own vomit. jonathan just walked away. so anyway, lauren, i know you are smart and you will have a lot of fun in college, just make sure you pick dependable and loving new friends. i wish i did that from the start, but i was in love. damn it.

[oohbarnicles]

the fact that i found dependable people in the honors college is irrelevant because jonathan and all the bad kids are in the honors college too. ha.