(no subject)
Well guess what kids. Turns out I fucked up me and Robby's relationship about 6 days after that last entry. He hated me for a few months. Then liked me again, and then dropped me again, adn treated me like a backup. How fucking beautiful.
My parents and I got a bit better, but now I'm some crazy inhumane emotionless malicious morbid anarchist now apparently. And that I'm a waste of human skin, but seeing as my temper's been flaring more lately, we fight less.
Bleh, and since Robby's I've pretended I have no emotion and have just been playing people, and it's getting me into rotten situations x.x Because I figured I'd treat guys the same way they treat me.
And I've just been generally pretending reality doesn't exist, as my health got much worse. I'm back to medication everyday to keep me sane and visibly okay.
School is worse, I can't concentrate on anything, all I can think about is how I'll probably die due to myself, and I don't want to, I just want everything to be okay again. I want Robby to love me again, I want him back. I want my health back, all of it. I want my innocence back. I want all these fucking addictions that I claim make me happier for a while to be non-existant. Fuck I hate the person I've become. And it's all my fucking fault.
And fuck, I hate what's happening around me. I don't want to be here ._.
Krissy, if you read this, I miss you so much, and want to talk to you again x.x
msn: demyn@hotmail.com aim: KiTKatZ GoT ByTe
Please.. I'm going crazy, I want to talk to you while I'm still here ._.
My parents and I got a bit better, but now I'm some crazy inhumane emotionless malicious morbid anarchist now apparently. And that I'm a waste of human skin, but seeing as my temper's been flaring more lately, we fight less.
Bleh, and since Robby's I've pretended I have no emotion and have just been playing people, and it's getting me into rotten situations x.x Because I figured I'd treat guys the same way they treat me.
And I've just been generally pretending reality doesn't exist, as my health got much worse. I'm back to medication everyday to keep me sane and visibly okay.
School is worse, I can't concentrate on anything, all I can think about is how I'll probably die due to myself, and I don't want to, I just want everything to be okay again. I want Robby to love me again, I want him back. I want my health back, all of it. I want my innocence back. I want all these fucking addictions that I claim make me happier for a while to be non-existant. Fuck I hate the person I've become. And it's all my fucking fault.
And fuck, I hate what's happening around me. I don't want to be here ._.
Krissy, if you read this, I miss you so much, and want to talk to you again x.x
msn: demyn@hotmail.com aim: KiTKatZ GoT ByTe
Please.. I'm going crazy, I want to talk to you while I'm still here ._.