i hate what i become.
this country is going to shit and i don't want to live through it. we're drowning from above. anyways, the events of today have upset me to the point where i went to sleep for 2 hours, only to wake up to.. not a surprise, just reality. our souls are dying. i don't think anyone realizes how serious everything is. i'm so ashamed. never had to say it about here. i'm scared shitless. anyways.
i snapped out of it a bit later. jen offered intellectual conversation which has lasted a good 5 hours now, sometimes its good to speak to someone who can somewhat understand me. and then possibly the best thing happened... i was apoligized to, and a questioning i had for a few months now was somewhat answered. i was just glad to hear from people i haven't heard from in some time, or one person actually. i have mark to thank tonight.
i have no one here. at all. it's scary. i'm realizing how lonely i am at home and i have to just deal with it.
damnittofuckinghell. how did i go so wrong in loving you? i'mbitterasfuckrightnow.
I NEVER WANTED TO FEEL THIS WAY.
i snapped out of it a bit later. jen offered intellectual conversation which has lasted a good 5 hours now, sometimes its good to speak to someone who can somewhat understand me. and then possibly the best thing happened... i was apoligized to, and a questioning i had for a few months now was somewhat answered. i was just glad to hear from people i haven't heard from in some time, or one person actually. i have mark to thank tonight.
i have no one here. at all. it's scary. i'm realizing how lonely i am at home and i have to just deal with it.
damnittofuckinghell. how did i go so wrong in loving you? i'mbitterasfuckrightnow.
I NEVER WANTED TO FEEL THIS WAY.