We've got everything down to a science...
...So I guess we know everything.
So though many of you thought I quit lj forever. Guess whose back bitches. That's right it was only a wikibreak. In any case the reason I came out of my retirement was some crazy fucking revelation I had this day. See up until recently I had held evolution in some regard due to my personal beliefs, however before I had known it I launched a vicious salvo directly at this stupid theory and have exposed it for the fake it is. For those interested in it I have assembled the chat logs here, unedited mind you, between myself (hindenstapler) and a one Andrew Kissner (lakerdonald). So if you are at all inclined, sit back grab some popcorn and enjoy the fall of that fucker we call Darwin.
hindenstapler (1:11:20 AM): also this evolution bullshit
hindenstapler (1:11:41 AM): its just a science bandage to the philosophy of life
hindenstapler (1:11:48 AM): same with the big bang
lakerdonald (1:11:58 AM): dude i know
lakerdonald (1:12:00 AM): i know.
lakerdonald (1:12:05 AM): we're alone
lakerdonald (1:12:06 AM): i think
lakerdonald (1:12:10 AM): and that's so depressing to me
hindenstapler (1:12:08 AM): and those jackasses who are atheists
hindenstapler (1:12:21 AM): no I mean theres obviously a point
hindenstapler (1:12:30 AM): there isn't simply nothing
lakerdonald (1:12:36 AM): I'm becoming more of an atheist each day
hindenstapler (1:12:36 AM): there has to be something
lakerdonald (1:12:44 AM): i mean i know there's got to be something
lakerdonald (1:12:53 AM): but i guess i no longer know that
lakerdonald (1:12:56 AM): i just want to believe that
hindenstapler (1:13:04 AM): else who the fuck would get such sick pleasure out of this day to day bullshit we call living
lakerdonald (1:13:10 AM): like i used to firmly be able to say that i knew that there was something else behind all of this
hindenstapler (1:13:14 AM): oh there is
lakerdonald (1:13:22 AM): but now i can only say that i believe that
lakerdonald (1:13:26 AM): that i want to believe that
lakerdonald (1:13:33 AM): because if we really are all alone
lakerdonald (1:13:35 AM): then hell dude
lakerdonald (1:13:43 AM): that's fucking the saddest thing i've ever heard.
hindenstapler (1:13:55 AM): I just can't think that we're alone
lakerdonald (1:14:09 AM): neither can i
lakerdonald (1:14:13 AM): it's so lonely.
hindenstapler (1:14:13 AM): all of this bullshit has to be working to some fucking purpose
lakerdonald (1:14:26 AM): god i hope we're right
hindenstapler (1:14:36 AM): idfk its just for me there is no room for doubt
lakerdonald (1:14:57 AM): i want the Christians to be right
lakerdonald (1:15:02 AM): but i just don't think they can be
hindenstapler (1:15:50 AM): idfk
hindenstapler (1:16:26 AM): intelligence and the capacity to feel emotion are not products of any sort of random sequence of events
hindenstapler (1:16:57 AM): I mean what evolutionary purpose can a feeling be used for
lakerdonald (1:17:13 AM): all goes back to fight or flight
hindenstapler (1:17:15 AM): no thats a fucking cop out
hindenstapler (1:17:26 AM): if thats the root
hindenstapler (1:17:35 AM): then why the fuck did it develop further
lakerdonald (1:17:40 AM): i meant that if there's no purpose then it's fight or flight
hindenstapler (1:18:14 AM): I mean take some bullshit explanation of love: "it helps the parents yadda yadda young survive."
hindenstapler (1:18:18 AM): load of shit
lakerdonald (1:18:40 AM): it exists to fuck my life up
hindenstapler (1:18:50 AM): science has conceived evolution and a basic sense of logic can fucking make everything better
hindenstapler (1:18:58 AM): love: bullshit
hindenstapler (1:19:30 AM): replace if with simple if statement:
if(thing= member of opposite sex)
havesexwith()
hindenstapler (1:19:33 AM): period
hindenstapler (1:19:38 AM): end of story
lakerdonald (1:19:48 AM): haha
hindenstapler (1:19:48 AM): species prorogation
lakerdonald (1:19:53 AM): good idea
hindenstapler (1:19:51 AM): what a load of shit
hindenstapler (1:20:13 AM): its so fucking complex that based on evolution it defies the very laws
lakerdonald (1:20:23 AM): true
lakerdonald (1:20:30 AM): it's like counterproductive
hindenstapler (1:20:38 AM): at the first sign of this complex emotion then that individual would of died out
hindenstapler (1:21:10 AM): evolution basically wants everything to become more complex yet stay simple at the same time
hindenstapler (1:21:34 AM): and in trying to do both all it does is prove itself to be fuckign stupid and a lie
hindenstapler (1:21:52 AM): and thats why we don't know shit
lakerdonald (1:22:06 AM): well put
hindenstapler (1:22:06 AM): I say make bio like a half a semester
hindenstapler (1:22:23 AM): and the other half: philosophy class
lakerdonald (1:22:36 AM): haha
hindenstapler (1:22:38 AM): its more productive than learning this crap
lakerdonald (1:22:43 AM): the philosophy of biology
hindenstapler (1:22:52 AM): hell creation or even why the fuck are we here 101
lakerdonald (1:23:07 AM): I'd take that last one
hindenstapler (1:23:10 AM): I mean Jesus
hindenstapler (1:23:35 AM): the very fact we've come to the point of realizing it exists even more so destroys it
hindenstapler (1:23:46 AM): I mean then we've got some active participation in it
hindenstapler (1:23:54 AM): which undermines its purpose
hindenstapler (1:24:09 AM): god I hate science
lakerdonald (1:24:45 AM): yeah i see your point
lakerdonald (1:24:52 AM): we've broken the proverbial 4th wall
hindenstapler (1:24:58 AM): get those logs I've got send them to nagin so his atheist ass will cry
hindenstapler (1:25:15 AM): hell for good measure send them to any atheist you know of
lakerdonald (1:25:26 AM): haha
lakerdonald (1:25:29 AM): tru tru
hindenstapler (1:25:31 AM): we'll hit those science pushing bastards where it hurts
hindenstapler (1:25:36 AM): in the Darwin stones
lakerdonald (1:25:59 AM): haha
hindenstapler (1:26:05 AM): Darwin? fuck him ever heard of Goodin's Theory of Shut the Fuck Up?
lakerdonald (1:26:28 AM): haha
lakerdonald (1:26:32 AM): you sound like colbert.
hindenstapler (1:26:54 AM): its not every day you completely disprove a commonly held theory
lakerdonald (1:27:19 AM): we accomplish more before 2:00 am than most people do all day.
hindenstapler (1:28:01 AM): hell I'll get an honorary degree from Harvard's philosophy department and hate mail from its bio department at the same time
lakerdonald (1:28:19 AM): then you'll know that you've made it in the world
If you didn't read it then you sir are obviously a left-wing communist who hates america.
So though many of you thought I quit lj forever. Guess whose back bitches. That's right it was only a wikibreak. In any case the reason I came out of my retirement was some crazy fucking revelation I had this day. See up until recently I had held evolution in some regard due to my personal beliefs, however before I had known it I launched a vicious salvo directly at this stupid theory and have exposed it for the fake it is. For those interested in it I have assembled the chat logs here, unedited mind you, between myself (hindenstapler) and a one Andrew Kissner (lakerdonald). So if you are at all inclined, sit back grab some popcorn and enjoy the fall of that fucker we call Darwin.
hindenstapler (1:11:20 AM): also this evolution bullshit
hindenstapler (1:11:41 AM): its just a science bandage to the philosophy of life
hindenstapler (1:11:48 AM): same with the big bang
lakerdonald (1:11:58 AM): dude i know
lakerdonald (1:12:00 AM): i know.
lakerdonald (1:12:05 AM): we're alone
lakerdonald (1:12:06 AM): i think
lakerdonald (1:12:10 AM): and that's so depressing to me
hindenstapler (1:12:08 AM): and those jackasses who are atheists
hindenstapler (1:12:21 AM): no I mean theres obviously a point
hindenstapler (1:12:30 AM): there isn't simply nothing
lakerdonald (1:12:36 AM): I'm becoming more of an atheist each day
hindenstapler (1:12:36 AM): there has to be something
lakerdonald (1:12:44 AM): i mean i know there's got to be something
lakerdonald (1:12:53 AM): but i guess i no longer know that
lakerdonald (1:12:56 AM): i just want to believe that
hindenstapler (1:13:04 AM): else who the fuck would get such sick pleasure out of this day to day bullshit we call living
lakerdonald (1:13:10 AM): like i used to firmly be able to say that i knew that there was something else behind all of this
hindenstapler (1:13:14 AM): oh there is
lakerdonald (1:13:22 AM): but now i can only say that i believe that
lakerdonald (1:13:26 AM): that i want to believe that
lakerdonald (1:13:33 AM): because if we really are all alone
lakerdonald (1:13:35 AM): then hell dude
lakerdonald (1:13:43 AM): that's fucking the saddest thing i've ever heard.
hindenstapler (1:13:55 AM): I just can't think that we're alone
lakerdonald (1:14:09 AM): neither can i
lakerdonald (1:14:13 AM): it's so lonely.
hindenstapler (1:14:13 AM): all of this bullshit has to be working to some fucking purpose
lakerdonald (1:14:26 AM): god i hope we're right
hindenstapler (1:14:36 AM): idfk its just for me there is no room for doubt
lakerdonald (1:14:57 AM): i want the Christians to be right
lakerdonald (1:15:02 AM): but i just don't think they can be
hindenstapler (1:15:50 AM): idfk
hindenstapler (1:16:26 AM): intelligence and the capacity to feel emotion are not products of any sort of random sequence of events
hindenstapler (1:16:57 AM): I mean what evolutionary purpose can a feeling be used for
lakerdonald (1:17:13 AM): all goes back to fight or flight
hindenstapler (1:17:15 AM): no thats a fucking cop out
hindenstapler (1:17:26 AM): if thats the root
hindenstapler (1:17:35 AM): then why the fuck did it develop further
lakerdonald (1:17:40 AM): i meant that if there's no purpose then it's fight or flight
hindenstapler (1:18:14 AM): I mean take some bullshit explanation of love: "it helps the parents yadda yadda young survive."
hindenstapler (1:18:18 AM): load of shit
lakerdonald (1:18:40 AM): it exists to fuck my life up
hindenstapler (1:18:50 AM): science has conceived evolution and a basic sense of logic can fucking make everything better
hindenstapler (1:18:58 AM): love: bullshit
hindenstapler (1:19:30 AM): replace if with simple if statement:
if(thing= member of opposite sex)
havesexwith()
hindenstapler (1:19:33 AM): period
hindenstapler (1:19:38 AM): end of story
lakerdonald (1:19:48 AM): haha
hindenstapler (1:19:48 AM): species prorogation
lakerdonald (1:19:53 AM): good idea
hindenstapler (1:19:51 AM): what a load of shit
hindenstapler (1:20:13 AM): its so fucking complex that based on evolution it defies the very laws
lakerdonald (1:20:23 AM): true
lakerdonald (1:20:30 AM): it's like counterproductive
hindenstapler (1:20:38 AM): at the first sign of this complex emotion then that individual would of died out
hindenstapler (1:21:10 AM): evolution basically wants everything to become more complex yet stay simple at the same time
hindenstapler (1:21:34 AM): and in trying to do both all it does is prove itself to be fuckign stupid and a lie
hindenstapler (1:21:52 AM): and thats why we don't know shit
lakerdonald (1:22:06 AM): well put
hindenstapler (1:22:06 AM): I say make bio like a half a semester
hindenstapler (1:22:23 AM): and the other half: philosophy class
lakerdonald (1:22:36 AM): haha
hindenstapler (1:22:38 AM): its more productive than learning this crap
lakerdonald (1:22:43 AM): the philosophy of biology
hindenstapler (1:22:52 AM): hell creation or even why the fuck are we here 101
lakerdonald (1:23:07 AM): I'd take that last one
hindenstapler (1:23:10 AM): I mean Jesus
hindenstapler (1:23:35 AM): the very fact we've come to the point of realizing it exists even more so destroys it
hindenstapler (1:23:46 AM): I mean then we've got some active participation in it
hindenstapler (1:23:54 AM): which undermines its purpose
hindenstapler (1:24:09 AM): god I hate science
lakerdonald (1:24:45 AM): yeah i see your point
lakerdonald (1:24:52 AM): we've broken the proverbial 4th wall
hindenstapler (1:24:58 AM): get those logs I've got send them to nagin so his atheist ass will cry
hindenstapler (1:25:15 AM): hell for good measure send them to any atheist you know of
lakerdonald (1:25:26 AM): haha
lakerdonald (1:25:29 AM): tru tru
hindenstapler (1:25:31 AM): we'll hit those science pushing bastards where it hurts
hindenstapler (1:25:36 AM): in the Darwin stones
lakerdonald (1:25:59 AM): haha
hindenstapler (1:26:05 AM): Darwin? fuck him ever heard of Goodin's Theory of Shut the Fuck Up?
lakerdonald (1:26:28 AM): haha
lakerdonald (1:26:32 AM): you sound like colbert.
hindenstapler (1:26:54 AM): its not every day you completely disprove a commonly held theory
lakerdonald (1:27:19 AM): we accomplish more before 2:00 am than most people do all day.
hindenstapler (1:28:01 AM): hell I'll get an honorary degree from Harvard's philosophy department and hate mail from its bio department at the same time
lakerdonald (1:28:19 AM): then you'll know that you've made it in the world
If you didn't read it then you sir are obviously a left-wing communist who hates america.