my thoughts,my problems,my opinions
Ok so i know that i hant written in like FOREVER but ive been busy....so where to start...i am an aunt now...shes perfect...Her name is Madeline Elyse Wilson..but i call her Pumpkin Head lol....you know when i found out that my sister was having a baby i was so angery...and i dont want anyone to think that im being mean about it because im not...but i was angery because i know my sister...and what i thought about it...i was right...everything that i thought has happened so far...i love me niece so much more than anyone could ever know...and i would do anything in the world for her...and so far ive gotten to spend ALL my time with her...i babysit her while my sister is at work and then i babysit her at night when my sister goes out..not that i dont mind its just that...shes only a month old and shes needs her mother...not her aunt..,,i love watching her..and i love spending time with her....i feel so bad for her though...because her mom is a mess..her father is a pot head...and shes just this little innocent baby that doesnt know anger or malice or jelousy or anything like that...shes just this little bundle of joy and chubby cheaks with rolls on her legs lol shes so cute...i wish that i could protect her from all the bad in the world but i cant...and that kills me....
And then theres my sister....i dont know what to do about her...shes just i dont know..shes letting her ex ( the babys daddy) run all over her...and she wont take up for herself and once again i want to protect her but i cant...shes her own person and shes an adult...but this guy is just using her...and i dont know what to do...i want to just take her and slap her around..and not only is she letting him run all over her but shes letting it affect her outlook on her child...shes has not spent hardly anytime with her since she found out some bad news...and i dont know why...but she puts her off on me..and not only is that not fair to me but its not fair to madeline...she needs her mother...shes needs to know that her mother is there...she needs to know that she is the most important thing in her mothers life....not that shes a burden on her mother cause things didnt work out with her plan to get her father back....it kills me...and theres nothing that i can do...i feel helpless...and it hurts me when i look in those beautiful little eyes...and know what i know...well now i dont know what to say..i just had to get that off my chest...even though i dont feel any better...but oh well...