Pain
I know that I have not written in this for ages. But I felt that I just had to write this. Ok. I am the type of person that needs to know that people like her. Girl thing right, who knows. Well I have been down for so many years but people never knew. I never tell my feeling to any one. I should, it might make me feel better. But when it comes to it, I just don't. What it bugging me the most right now, is my so called CLOSE friends. Most forgot my b-day and I did not theirs, but thats not it. I met this really wonderful person for me. He loves me for me and thats what counts. He is also ten years older than I. My mom got to know him and likes him, while my family also likes him. Two Close friends met him and liked him, but one did not even want to met him. Well, after 5 months of being together we decided to move to NC. The job and a place to live in NH just did not work for us. I was still living with my mom and he could only stay til 7, yeah nice. While he was living with his stupid sister. So after we knew that we were going to move and start a life together, I told my friends. Well, one wanted to talk me out of it. One stopped talking to me all together, and the other one; I tried making plans with but kept putting me off and saying it was my fault. So I got no happiness from them. I thought my family would not like it either but they were all for it and wanted me to have a nice time. They even gave me a little party. Well, I am here now for 5 months and I rarely talk to my family-was like that at home too, so not so upset, still hurts though. But my SO CALLED CLOSE FRIENDS stopped talking to me all together. After awhile I get a note from one and it asked how I was trying to keep the friendship going. What was I doing to keep it up and why I have not talked to any one. WHAT?!?! I tried talking and got pushed away. I tried see you before I left and was told not to because they did not want to met him. I just want to say FUCK them, but I just can't. I have no one here to talk to or hang out with. He works and it gets very lonely here. I have 4 cats, but its not the same. We use to have a great time with each other. Long drives, movie nights, staying out all night and getting my mom mad at me. It was great. Then the years past and slowly one just stop talking to me, but after awhile he came around and talked then he got a gf and I became her friend too. Well. I thought. The other friend I had to always call or text him to just hang. Though it was fun. Since I was in a different town had to drive there all the time. I got use to it. Though that hurt too. Then I find out that they really did not care for me much. I just want to know why the fuck they did that to me. I know talked to one because he found someone. Thanks talk to me only because of that. I should just shut them out forever, but can I?
