(no subject)
I still feel overwhelmed by all that I want compared to what I can give. 4 jobs and too many unpaid bills and 36 unanswered phone calls and 398 unread emails. My dream job offered me a chance at a 10 hr/week internship. Can I do it? Can I find the time? Can I find a real job, too? Can I find a way to pay all my bills this month or even next? More celebrity, more blog interviews, more requests for meetings, no job prospects.
Bless Erik for giving me space when I need it and love when I need it. I'm so busy, no I can't see you. I miss you, can I come over now? He spent all day helping me with something but when our friends made a W. Allen comment I didn't like, I just got up and walked out. Within a half-hour he got in touch to say that when I left, he looked up why I was upset and had everyone have a healthy discussion about it. The next morning, they all invited over two more friends to have them talk about it, too. Everyone apologized to me that night and we had a good talk about it all and what it means and how it feels and why we think they way we do. I'm overwhelmed sometimes by how good he is -- I get upset and irrational, he resolves it; I'm tired and fall asleep, he covers me up with a blanket; I can't figure out how to accomplish something, he calls his friends and asks for a team effort; I get sick, he surprises me with medicine and hugs. I've gotten better about being more open with him about my feelings, last night I listed off all the reasons why I care about him. Last night he told me that we've been together almost 3 months, "a quarter of a year" he said. I loved that because if you want to get technical, we had the talk in late October but it wasn't until late November that I really agreed to move forward with him and take this risk and I love that that's the time that he acknowledges, too. 3 months, 4 months, a year, whatever you want to say I say that this is far and away my happiest and healthiest relationship.
Bless Erik for giving me space when I need it and love when I need it. I'm so busy, no I can't see you. I miss you, can I come over now? He spent all day helping me with something but when our friends made a W. Allen comment I didn't like, I just got up and walked out. Within a half-hour he got in touch to say that when I left, he looked up why I was upset and had everyone have a healthy discussion about it. The next morning, they all invited over two more friends to have them talk about it, too. Everyone apologized to me that night and we had a good talk about it all and what it means and how it feels and why we think they way we do. I'm overwhelmed sometimes by how good he is -- I get upset and irrational, he resolves it; I'm tired and fall asleep, he covers me up with a blanket; I can't figure out how to accomplish something, he calls his friends and asks for a team effort; I get sick, he surprises me with medicine and hugs. I've gotten better about being more open with him about my feelings, last night I listed off all the reasons why I care about him. Last night he told me that we've been together almost 3 months, "a quarter of a year" he said. I loved that because if you want to get technical, we had the talk in late October but it wasn't until late November that I really agreed to move forward with him and take this risk and I love that that's the time that he acknowledges, too. 3 months, 4 months, a year, whatever you want to say I say that this is far and away my happiest and healthiest relationship.