Bitch, Piss, Whine, Moan, complain, and grumble
For this entry I would like to complain about my job. Because it's fun and I enjoy bitching about it. And I think Brian has heard me bitch about it enough.
At my job there are 3 general types of people I have to deal with.
1) Customers
2)Employees/management
3) People that work for other business that affect our company (electricions, delivery men, IBM, the floor cleaning people, etc.)
First lets start with customers. When dealing with the public you get a healthy mix of all kinds of people, all nationalities, all incomes, all walks of life. Especially at this company. But mostly our customers are Middle aged house wifes. Or as I affectionately call them, soccer moms. You know the type. The husband works all day, and she works at spending his money all day. Depending on whether or not she has kids and how old they are, they frequently come in tow with her. Kids don't bother me so much. I know their kids, and a lot of them are freekin cute. But most of these parents are terrible, and if they aren't they must turn into awful ones when they come into my store. The woman will shop in that "shopping daze" women have and COMPLETELY ignore their kids. The kids will run around grabbing things off shelves, putting them in the most random spots, knocking things down, tearing packages apart and I've seen countless ones walk out with stuff in hands that the ever-so attentive parent failed to notice. I don't really care if they steal shit, dosen't affect me, we make too much money to go nuts over a stolen $0.50 bottle of bubbles.
A lot of pregnant women come in too. We have a ton of things for babies, mostly scrapbooking. We have more isles dedicated to scrapbooking than any other hobby. And that's bullshit. How can you have 7 isles for scrapbooking and 2 isles for beading! And these women love to scrapbook. I think it's a pointless hobby. I really do. This is my scrapbook. So much cheaper!
Wasn't I supposed to be bitching?
So yeah, I've never been a big fan of women. Don't have much in common with them, aside from being an actual woman and the physical sufferings that all women have in common. That and men are always trying to have sex with me. But after working here I've grown to dispise women. Especially the ones with hairs up their asses. And we get a lot of them. The ones that find an item in some random spot in the store and try to argue with you that a $14.99 book costs a dollar because someone picked it up and was too lazy to put it back in it's proper spot. And they get PISSED. Look lady, EVERYTHING we sell in this store is bullshit. EVERYTHING. None of it is an item of necessity. Quit throwing a tantrum over a book your never going to read more than maybe once. A lot of women just come in pissed off. And I'm a very mellow person. It takes quite a bit to get me worked up into anger. And sometimes these women push too hard, and to see my wrath hit surface, would insure i lost my job. Just because I'm a cashier does NOT mean your better than me. I know a lot of shit about a lot of things. I'm actually quite smart. I'm willing to bet I'm smarter than a lot of these house wives.
We also get a lot of old ladies. Old ladies like to sew things and such the old fashioned way. I like the old ladies a bit better, they're too old to get upset over bullshit. But there are still some that are just bitter. And I mean bitter. Just mad at life. Mad at me because... i'm young I guess... I know how to send an email document? who knows?
Now we get men too. Most of them are ok. Except the older ones. For some reason old men are just ASSHOLES. I mean really. The rudest thing to happen to me on that job was performed by an old man. A man so old that if I kicked him once, not even hard, he'd be out for the count. Generally i like the guys. They don't like to make idle small talk. They bring me their things, I ring them up, they pay and leave. I'm terrible at small talk, and I'm very shy, so even if I want to say somthing to you I probably won't. I get a lot of pretty ladies go through my line who smell super good and have really nice outfits on. I always wanna say, "your such a pretty lady, and you smell so nice, and you have the best outfit on today" but I figure that would wierd people out, I know it would wierd me out to hear another girl say that to me.
We have sales pretty much every other week. We do our best to make sure that the store is marked clearly enough so that everyone understands what is on sale and for how much. People still don't get it. When we have a sale we usually have a coupon. For holidays we'll have extra coupons. It says right there on the coupon the expiration date, and that the coupon is only valid for 1 REGULARLY priced item. And when someone tries to use it on a product that is already on sale, and I gently explain as well as point out that the coupon only works on reguarly priced items. Some of the girls I work with explain it to you in a tone to try to make you feel stupid. I don't, I calmly explain that this is the way it goes, because I understand how time consuming it is to make sure you understand the fine print on a coupon. I'm not out to make you feel stupid, I really understand that you don't notice these things. It's hard being a woman sometimes, what with all that gossip, and socializing, and scrapbooking, things get confusing.
And my favorite thing, returns. I hate returns. There are two types of people, the type that return things, and the type that will just find some other use for the "oh my god why did i buy this" item. And the first type, are PSYCHOS. They'll return anything. Now, If I bought a $0.99 spool of ribbon, a tiny one at that, and decided that i didn't really want it, I'd just... give it somebody, or find something to use it for, never know when ribbion comes in handy. Might need to tie off before shooting herion or somthing (no i kid). But the Psychos will return it, and when I do a return, since I have no management status, I have to make people with real purchases wait while I call and call for a manager to give me a key so the register of evil will allow me to complete their return. Because $1.09 is sooooo worth getting your money back for... you could buy... um... a small candy bar... maybe... And sometimes they try to bring back stuff that they broke, or used, took out of the package. And I know in my head that they shouldn't be returning it. They opened it, used it, damaged it in some way, and still get their money back for it. That's like buying a pair of panties, taking a shit in them, letting it crust over for a few days, then return them and say their too small...
But Michaels will let us return anything. Really. You could buy say a picture frame, smash it with a hammer, drag it across 7 staes tied to the back of a truck, wrap it in cheap ducktape and wipe your ass with it a few times, and they'd still let us return it.
And customer service. People seem to think we're just an oddity store. And we sell everything under the freekin sun. We don't. We just don't. And don't get mad at me because we don't. Ain't my fault, I don't own the place, I'm not even responsible for ordering things. I just scan it through the register. Today I got asked: "do you have fan poles" Not knowing what it was I asked "not sure, what is it?" thinking that if they described it or its use to me I would be able to direct them to an area that might have it. Instead I get *shrug* "I don't know, its just a pole" so I'm like, "we have flag poles" *rolls eyes* I'M SORRY! I'VE NEVER HEARD OF SUCH A THING AS A FAN POLE! I've been working there for nearly a year, I know where everything is, I know what all seasonal stuff we have and where it is. I know the names of things and the prices of things. I know If something is $4.99 it's going to be $5.45 with tax. I know a lot of stuff, I don't know what the fuck of a fan pole is.
And customer service calls, the worst. I dread the phone. Everytime it rings I cringe. Cuz someone on the other end expects you to know every product we have off the top of our head, how much it costs, and how to use it. So you answer the call, they state what they are looking for. You say "hold on let me go check for you" on the other end you get this exhasperated sigh, as though their time is so freekin precious that they need to know at that very second. It's bad enough your doing their shopping for them, but they treat you like shit for it too. So you find said product, go back to phone say "yes we have it" then they ask you a ton of questions about it, "how much does it cost, how much does it weigh, how do you use it" You failed to check all this information because all they asked was for you to check to see if you had it. So you say "hold on I'll have to go look again" In reply you get *angry voice* "just forget it I'll come in and look myself" *hangs up on you*
I hope you get an itchy fungus in your anus.
Now we migrate to employess/management/coorporate management.
Most of the girls and guys I work with are easy to get along with. In fact I think I'm on good terms with all of them. What can i say, I'm a nice person and try to maintain a happy medium with people I work with. But every week there seems to be a new level of drama. Especially amongst management. The gossip is nice, but it makes everyone seem so false. When I know someone dosen't like someone else, yet they're nice to their face it just irritates me. I'm thinking "you talk all this shit behind their back, yet when their around it's as though nothing was wrong" Its so petty. But that's what you get when working with women.
And the calling out has got to stop. Girls will religiously call out. Usually the main cashiers. And if I happen to work the same shift, guess who gets fucked. O yeah. This was never a problem when I first started, now its an everyday thing. And what does my manager do to ensure that the store runs smoothly in case this frequent occurance happens? Not shit.
The store manager himself, is an idiot. He's a terrible slave driving manager. I don't like working with him. Everytime he sees you he has some new stupid task for you to do. As if you didn't have enough to do as it is. And god forbid he do it himself.
And none of the managers ever want to come to my rescue when I'm knee deep in pissed off customers. I have to call a manager for a return, depending on whos there, if I call one they'll tell me to call another, if i call them they're on break and I need to call someone else, If i call them they'll say their too busy to keep running up to the register. It makes me want to cry sometimes. But all this would be eliminated if they'd give me a damn key. But noooo, I might steal money. Because I'll just ignore the fact that there is a camera right on me and that I could go to jail. And I've been known to steal so much from all my other jobs.
And the coorporate people must be MORONS who have no idea what customer service is like. We have coupons as previously stated. We used to give them to people if they asked for them. But no! We can't do that anymore! Customers get so pissed at me when I tell them they can't, and other Michael's in Nashville have orders from coorporate to let them have the coupon when they ask for it. WTF?? What the fucking hell, I have to get bitched at for 2 miniutes because the bastards can't make up their damn mind about a stupid piece of paper. And they give into the customers in a heartbeat. And the customers walk all over us, because they're ALWAYS right, even when they're wrong.
And as for the other people. They just irritate me. I'm up to my elbows in greenery and glass vases and they come prancing in expecting me to know every tiny detail of every stupid thing in the damn store. I come in, put on apron, and try not to let customers get to me all day, other than that, I don't know shit, so go away!
I hate working mondays. Because apparrently i'm such a genius cashier that they deem me worthy enough of standing up there and being the puppet for customers all day. I hate being a cashier. I hate it i hate it i hate it. It's too hectic for me. Ringing up customer, 2 more in line, one with screaming child, phone rings, random customer walks in with an issue that needs to be addressed right now even though I'm trying to complete a sale and assist some bimbo on the phone and gets pissy when I tell them to wait a second cuz my mind can't be in 5 places at once.
You know what would be cool though? A monkey to help me bag things, and to scream irritatingly when customers get pissy.
I'm quite unhappy with my job, but its how i make money. So until something better comes along or someone finally does me a favor and shoots me, there i shall remain.
At my job there are 3 general types of people I have to deal with.
1) Customers
2)Employees/management
3) People that work for other business that affect our company (electricions, delivery men, IBM, the floor cleaning people, etc.)
First lets start with customers. When dealing with the public you get a healthy mix of all kinds of people, all nationalities, all incomes, all walks of life. Especially at this company. But mostly our customers are Middle aged house wifes. Or as I affectionately call them, soccer moms. You know the type. The husband works all day, and she works at spending his money all day. Depending on whether or not she has kids and how old they are, they frequently come in tow with her. Kids don't bother me so much. I know their kids, and a lot of them are freekin cute. But most of these parents are terrible, and if they aren't they must turn into awful ones when they come into my store. The woman will shop in that "shopping daze" women have and COMPLETELY ignore their kids. The kids will run around grabbing things off shelves, putting them in the most random spots, knocking things down, tearing packages apart and I've seen countless ones walk out with stuff in hands that the ever-so attentive parent failed to notice. I don't really care if they steal shit, dosen't affect me, we make too much money to go nuts over a stolen $0.50 bottle of bubbles.
A lot of pregnant women come in too. We have a ton of things for babies, mostly scrapbooking. We have more isles dedicated to scrapbooking than any other hobby. And that's bullshit. How can you have 7 isles for scrapbooking and 2 isles for beading! And these women love to scrapbook. I think it's a pointless hobby. I really do. This is my scrapbook. So much cheaper!
Wasn't I supposed to be bitching?
So yeah, I've never been a big fan of women. Don't have much in common with them, aside from being an actual woman and the physical sufferings that all women have in common. That and men are always trying to have sex with me. But after working here I've grown to dispise women. Especially the ones with hairs up their asses. And we get a lot of them. The ones that find an item in some random spot in the store and try to argue with you that a $14.99 book costs a dollar because someone picked it up and was too lazy to put it back in it's proper spot. And they get PISSED. Look lady, EVERYTHING we sell in this store is bullshit. EVERYTHING. None of it is an item of necessity. Quit throwing a tantrum over a book your never going to read more than maybe once. A lot of women just come in pissed off. And I'm a very mellow person. It takes quite a bit to get me worked up into anger. And sometimes these women push too hard, and to see my wrath hit surface, would insure i lost my job. Just because I'm a cashier does NOT mean your better than me. I know a lot of shit about a lot of things. I'm actually quite smart. I'm willing to bet I'm smarter than a lot of these house wives.
We also get a lot of old ladies. Old ladies like to sew things and such the old fashioned way. I like the old ladies a bit better, they're too old to get upset over bullshit. But there are still some that are just bitter. And I mean bitter. Just mad at life. Mad at me because... i'm young I guess... I know how to send an email document? who knows?
Now we get men too. Most of them are ok. Except the older ones. For some reason old men are just ASSHOLES. I mean really. The rudest thing to happen to me on that job was performed by an old man. A man so old that if I kicked him once, not even hard, he'd be out for the count. Generally i like the guys. They don't like to make idle small talk. They bring me their things, I ring them up, they pay and leave. I'm terrible at small talk, and I'm very shy, so even if I want to say somthing to you I probably won't. I get a lot of pretty ladies go through my line who smell super good and have really nice outfits on. I always wanna say, "your such a pretty lady, and you smell so nice, and you have the best outfit on today" but I figure that would wierd people out, I know it would wierd me out to hear another girl say that to me.
We have sales pretty much every other week. We do our best to make sure that the store is marked clearly enough so that everyone understands what is on sale and for how much. People still don't get it. When we have a sale we usually have a coupon. For holidays we'll have extra coupons. It says right there on the coupon the expiration date, and that the coupon is only valid for 1 REGULARLY priced item. And when someone tries to use it on a product that is already on sale, and I gently explain as well as point out that the coupon only works on reguarly priced items. Some of the girls I work with explain it to you in a tone to try to make you feel stupid. I don't, I calmly explain that this is the way it goes, because I understand how time consuming it is to make sure you understand the fine print on a coupon. I'm not out to make you feel stupid, I really understand that you don't notice these things. It's hard being a woman sometimes, what with all that gossip, and socializing, and scrapbooking, things get confusing.
And my favorite thing, returns. I hate returns. There are two types of people, the type that return things, and the type that will just find some other use for the "oh my god why did i buy this" item. And the first type, are PSYCHOS. They'll return anything. Now, If I bought a $0.99 spool of ribbon, a tiny one at that, and decided that i didn't really want it, I'd just... give it somebody, or find something to use it for, never know when ribbion comes in handy. Might need to tie off before shooting herion or somthing (no i kid). But the Psychos will return it, and when I do a return, since I have no management status, I have to make people with real purchases wait while I call and call for a manager to give me a key so the register of evil will allow me to complete their return. Because $1.09 is sooooo worth getting your money back for... you could buy... um... a small candy bar... maybe... And sometimes they try to bring back stuff that they broke, or used, took out of the package. And I know in my head that they shouldn't be returning it. They opened it, used it, damaged it in some way, and still get their money back for it. That's like buying a pair of panties, taking a shit in them, letting it crust over for a few days, then return them and say their too small...
But Michaels will let us return anything. Really. You could buy say a picture frame, smash it with a hammer, drag it across 7 staes tied to the back of a truck, wrap it in cheap ducktape and wipe your ass with it a few times, and they'd still let us return it.
And customer service. People seem to think we're just an oddity store. And we sell everything under the freekin sun. We don't. We just don't. And don't get mad at me because we don't. Ain't my fault, I don't own the place, I'm not even responsible for ordering things. I just scan it through the register. Today I got asked: "do you have fan poles" Not knowing what it was I asked "not sure, what is it?" thinking that if they described it or its use to me I would be able to direct them to an area that might have it. Instead I get *shrug* "I don't know, its just a pole" so I'm like, "we have flag poles" *rolls eyes* I'M SORRY! I'VE NEVER HEARD OF SUCH A THING AS A FAN POLE! I've been working there for nearly a year, I know where everything is, I know what all seasonal stuff we have and where it is. I know the names of things and the prices of things. I know If something is $4.99 it's going to be $5.45 with tax. I know a lot of stuff, I don't know what the fuck of a fan pole is.
And customer service calls, the worst. I dread the phone. Everytime it rings I cringe. Cuz someone on the other end expects you to know every product we have off the top of our head, how much it costs, and how to use it. So you answer the call, they state what they are looking for. You say "hold on let me go check for you" on the other end you get this exhasperated sigh, as though their time is so freekin precious that they need to know at that very second. It's bad enough your doing their shopping for them, but they treat you like shit for it too. So you find said product, go back to phone say "yes we have it" then they ask you a ton of questions about it, "how much does it cost, how much does it weigh, how do you use it" You failed to check all this information because all they asked was for you to check to see if you had it. So you say "hold on I'll have to go look again" In reply you get *angry voice* "just forget it I'll come in and look myself" *hangs up on you*
I hope you get an itchy fungus in your anus.
Now we migrate to employess/management/coorporate management.
Most of the girls and guys I work with are easy to get along with. In fact I think I'm on good terms with all of them. What can i say, I'm a nice person and try to maintain a happy medium with people I work with. But every week there seems to be a new level of drama. Especially amongst management. The gossip is nice, but it makes everyone seem so false. When I know someone dosen't like someone else, yet they're nice to their face it just irritates me. I'm thinking "you talk all this shit behind their back, yet when their around it's as though nothing was wrong" Its so petty. But that's what you get when working with women.
And the calling out has got to stop. Girls will religiously call out. Usually the main cashiers. And if I happen to work the same shift, guess who gets fucked. O yeah. This was never a problem when I first started, now its an everyday thing. And what does my manager do to ensure that the store runs smoothly in case this frequent occurance happens? Not shit.
The store manager himself, is an idiot. He's a terrible slave driving manager. I don't like working with him. Everytime he sees you he has some new stupid task for you to do. As if you didn't have enough to do as it is. And god forbid he do it himself.
And none of the managers ever want to come to my rescue when I'm knee deep in pissed off customers. I have to call a manager for a return, depending on whos there, if I call one they'll tell me to call another, if i call them they're on break and I need to call someone else, If i call them they'll say their too busy to keep running up to the register. It makes me want to cry sometimes. But all this would be eliminated if they'd give me a damn key. But noooo, I might steal money. Because I'll just ignore the fact that there is a camera right on me and that I could go to jail. And I've been known to steal so much from all my other jobs.
And the coorporate people must be MORONS who have no idea what customer service is like. We have coupons as previously stated. We used to give them to people if they asked for them. But no! We can't do that anymore! Customers get so pissed at me when I tell them they can't, and other Michael's in Nashville have orders from coorporate to let them have the coupon when they ask for it. WTF?? What the fucking hell, I have to get bitched at for 2 miniutes because the bastards can't make up their damn mind about a stupid piece of paper. And they give into the customers in a heartbeat. And the customers walk all over us, because they're ALWAYS right, even when they're wrong.
And as for the other people. They just irritate me. I'm up to my elbows in greenery and glass vases and they come prancing in expecting me to know every tiny detail of every stupid thing in the damn store. I come in, put on apron, and try not to let customers get to me all day, other than that, I don't know shit, so go away!
I hate working mondays. Because apparrently i'm such a genius cashier that they deem me worthy enough of standing up there and being the puppet for customers all day. I hate being a cashier. I hate it i hate it i hate it. It's too hectic for me. Ringing up customer, 2 more in line, one with screaming child, phone rings, random customer walks in with an issue that needs to be addressed right now even though I'm trying to complete a sale and assist some bimbo on the phone and gets pissy when I tell them to wait a second cuz my mind can't be in 5 places at once.
You know what would be cool though? A monkey to help me bag things, and to scream irritatingly when customers get pissy.
I'm quite unhappy with my job, but its how i make money. So until something better comes along or someone finally does me a favor and shoots me, there i shall remain.