Two Ficlets
Into the Ocean--Blue October
“You don’t love me,” Heechul announces one day at breakfast, voice calm. He doesn’t look angry or despondent, his voice doesn’t waver, his eyes don’t cry. And since he said this at the breakfast table, with five plus other members present, rather than in the privacy of their bed, Hankyung takes it as a joke, laughs it off. But Heechul’s face doesn’t change, in fact it becomes more somber, and Hankyung trails off nervously. Everyone else shifts uncomfortably, looking anywhere but at them. Hankyung drops the ‘he’s joking’ approach and tries for ‘he’s being a drama queen.’
“Heenim,” he says coaxingly, “Heechullie-”
“Don’t.” Heechul cuts him off sharply, “Don’t call me that. Not now.” Hankyung can feel the ball of tension cramping in his stomach growing, and the bile rises in his throat. Heechul looks up from his plate to look Hankyung square in the eye.
“You don’t love me,” he says again, and his voice is so blank it scares Hankyung, because Heechul is never emotionless, he’s brimming with feeling and movement.
“I do,” says Hankyung tightly, and reaches for Heechul’s hand, ignoring the other people at the table in favour of dealing with whatever is wrong here. “I do, don’t you dare say-” Heechul jerks his hand back, and now at least there is fire in his eyes, though when he speaks it’s in that same wooden tone.
“But not the way I love you.” Hankyung withdraws his own hand and stares at Eeteuk’s glass. He wishes Heechul wouldn’t of brought this up in front of everyone. He wishes Heechul would have never brought this up, because once it’s said it can’t be unsaid, it can’t be ignored or glossed over any longer.
“No,” he admits quietly, for the first time to Heechul, for the first time to himself. Heechul looks faintly triumphant.
“I’m not going to end it,” says Heechul flatly. “I won’t be the one to end it.” The entire table looks to Hankyung while trying not to look like they’re looking at Hankyung. But Hankyung will never be the one to end it either, because he might not love Heechul enough for a happily ever after, but he wants him too much to ever let him go, or let anyone else have him. So he stays silent, gaze fixed on the tabletop.
Heechul’s face twists, bitter, and he smiles a jagged broken smile.
“I win,” he says.
Title: Slow Dancing in the Dark
Pairing: hankyung/heechul
Rating: K, PG, fluffy
Backstreets, Bruce Springsteen
“Hankyung,” Heechul announces one night, “we are leaving. Now.” Hankyung blinks.
“Okay,” he says, and reaches for his shoes, shrugs on his jacket. Eeteuk squawks in protest.
“Wha-Heechul, it’s freezing, and late, and we have a tight schedule tomorrow, and-” Eeteuk gives up. “Wear a hat. Don’t stay out too long.”
“Don’t come back,” says Kangin.
Heechul drags Hankyung out the door and down the hallway to the stairs. They spill out onto the streets, leaning heavily on each other as they run across the pavement, slipping on the ice. Hankyung grabs Heechul’s scarf and pulls him into a dark snow covered alleyway. Heechul protests, whining about the cold and shivering, so Hankyung pushes him against the frozen wall and warms him up. Heechul pulls him closer by his beltloops and smiles against his lips.
They find five more alleyways before they head back.