The Sexual Escapades of Alfred F. Jones::Part 1::
Title: The Sexual Escapades of Alfred F. Jones
Author/Artist: blahblahyourmom
Character(s) or Pairing(s): America, England, Russia, Japan,
Rating: M
Warnings: Underage sex, cursing, gay sex, slight dub-con? Maybe OOC-ness? IDK.
Summary: The romantic, humorous, and dramatic life of Alfred F. Jones as he navigates from high school into college and the real world. It doesn't help that his ex-best friend/fuckenemy is going to college in the same area as Alfred too. And then there's that hot annoying bakery owner later on....
Arthur calling Captain America a 'bloody git in tights' was the last straw for Alfred.
Full 8 year old fury was put into one punch to the other boy's nose. Within moments they were rolling around on the ground kicking and punching in the middle of a crowd of students cheering them on.
It took four teachers to pull them apart and two more to herd the rest of the spectators off.
Alfred was given a week of suspension. Arthur, two days.
When he came back to school the black eye he proudly sported was still there, not as prominent as it had been the first few days, but still there. Alfred felt like a war hero despite being ground for a whole month from his comic books and Nintendo. The comic books weren't so bad because Kiku snuck them to him during recess, but having to sit and watch his twin brother Mattie fail at getting through the first round of Donkey Kong was pure torture.
Torture with a capital 'T'.
He spent the next couple of weeks at recess wandering aimlessly and pointedly not looking at Arthur (who'd seemed to recover quickly and had glided over to Toris, Toris's weird friend Feliks, and Heracles). Occasionally Alfred would join Kiku and try to sit still for the next twenty minutes and read comic books or manga with him. Over time, it grew easier to sit still and Kiku even started teaching him how to draw.
This led to hanging out at one another's house every other weekend and pretty soon they decided they were best friends.
Good thing they'd lived down the block from each other for practically their whole lives (even though their dads often clashed because Alfred's dad was kind of loud and boisterous like Alfred often was). Their mothers bonded over gardening and Mattie often hung out with Alfred and Kiku on occasion when he wasn't busy with Rafael (who hated Alfred and vice versa).
And so the years passed.
They all grew up. Graduated grammar school and moved onto high school. Alfred was into sports, yet couldn't help liking art. He tried everything, before settling with tennis. It was fun! And great with getting stress out of the way.
Alfred was even good at drawing and sculpting and painting, to his (and Matt's and their parents) surprise. They were even more surprised when he announced he was going to apply to art school with Kiku. A bigger surprise was Matt announcing he was going to join the Marines after high school. Even Kiku was shocked at that.
He liked drawing comic books the best. So did Kiku. All through high school they worked on a little comic project together that was actually pretty awesome. The only person that didn't like it was Arthur but Alfred claimed it was only because Arthur hated him.
Alfred hated him back too. Especially when Arthur had come back from living in England during their 8th grade year with a stupid accent. Alfred cited it as the cause of a few of their many fights.
Oh yes. They still fought to the amusement of their peers.
They had weekly brawls that they tried to keep off of school grounds up until sophomore year of high school. That year, around Thanksgiving, Arthur had gone over to the Jones residence when Matt was at hockey practice and Mr. and Mrs. Jones were out of state visiting a sick, ailing relative. Alfred hadn't even invited the fake limey bastard.
"The fuck are you doing in my house?" Was his way of greeting his former best friend, not even looking up from his video game. Though it was more "Thmf fumfck ahrewe yew dowumfingd und meumf huff?" because Alfred had his mouth full of burger.
Arthur had just sneered at him and launched into one of his usual tirades about Alfred's eating habits. "Seriously, you're going to end up obese and with heart problems in the end…"
Offering a quick prayer to the fast food gods, Alfred threw the rest of the burger at him which caused the other boy to dive out of the way with a high pitched shriek.
"What was that for, you bloody git?" Arthur demanded, his voice high pitched. "Because you're a uptight bastard, dude," Alfred replied coolly, too immersed in his video game. "And your voice is annoying," He added, rolling his eyes.
Arthur stood there seething, fists clenched. Had he been a cartoon character his face would have been boiling with rage.
"You….You…" He choked out as he took short halting steps towards Alfred, getting in the way of him and the TV.
"Fuck! Dude!" Alfred yelped, trying to see around him. "The fuck are you doing?"
Arthur turned the TV off despite Alfred's protests before stepping closer to the other boy. He took the video game controller and threw it to the side. In a flash he pulled Alfred up by the front of his shirt.
"You…You don't…" Arthur said haltingly before crashing his lips against Alfred's. The taller boy resisted, trying to shove his former friend off for a good few long moments before he gave in.
"This doesn't change anything," He murmured as he pulled Arthur down onto the couch, hands roaming down to the other boy's waist. It was amusing to him that Arthur had ended up smaller than he. Amusing, indeed.
"Like hell it doesn't," Arthur snarled back, digging his nails into Alfred's back. He scratched, neither gently nor harshly. "I want to fuck you."
Alfred snorted as he shook his head. "Fuck no. If anyone was going to be doing that it would be me," He vehemently insisted despite that he sounded a bit uncertain.
Sex, surprisingly enough, was something that rarely crossed his mind. He had the occasional wet dream, of course, but aside from that he barely thought about it. Or if it came up in any of his video games or comic books.
"I. Will. Fuck. You," Arthur simply growled, digging his fingers into Alfred's arms. The taller boy yelped out a bit from the pain. Arthur just grinned as he slipped a hand up Alfred's shirt and-
There was a knock on the door. Alfred shoved Arthur away as he sprang up to go and answer it.
"Not so fast," Arthur said, grabbing the other boy's arm. (What the hell? How the fuck was he so strong?) "Leave it. It's probably a delivery person."
There was another knock. "It could be someone wanting to visit my mom," Alfred whined, slapping the hand going up his shirt away. Arthur scowled before yielding and slumping back onto the couch.
Alfred answered the door. Like Arthur had predicted, it was a delivery man. Alfred signed for the package, Matt's special maple syrup from Canada probably, and tossed the package to the side after closing the door.
"See?" Arthur smugly grinned when Alfred was seated next to him again. The grin was wiped off of his face with a punch to the jaw.
The punch led to Arthur tackling Alfred off the couch. The tackling led to fighting which led to the two former friends drying humping each other until they each came into their pants.
Arthur was the first to react. "You git! Look what you made me do!" He made a face as he looked down at his pants. "It's what you wanted, didn't you?" Alfred innocently replied as he shoved the other off of him and stood up. Euck.
Arthur left after they cleaned themselves up. Alfred spent the rest of the day playing his video games until Matthew came home. Their parents returned home a couple hours later, arguing of course, thus the twins retreated to their bedrooms.
Alfred dozed off as he read a book for English with his Ipod blaring. He didn't know how much time had passed until vibrations signaling a text on his cell phone jolted him from that state and he fumbled to pull it out and check to see whom the text was from. He frowned for he didn't recognize the number.
'Oi.'
Ah, Arthur.
'What.' Alfred yawned as he texted back, sitting up and glancing at his alarm clock. 9:30. Dayum.
'How about we hang around my place tomorrow? My parents will be out.'
'No. Fuck off.' Alfred turned his phone off and set it on his nightstand before attempting to read the book again.
He didn't answer Arthur's texts for the rest of the weekend, only bothering to look at one to put his number into his phone. The text was filled with a string of expletives anyway.
_____________________________________________________________________________________
Monday it rained. Alfred got detention for sleeping during class. (He couldn't sleep the night before on account of thinking about what he and Arthur had done Friday afternoon. Did it mean he was gay? Not that he had a problem with being gay at all.)
Tuesday it rained. (Still thought about it. Sucked not being able to ask Matt his opinion.)
Wednesday it rained. (Only thought about it for two hours. Drew a comic about it and then burned said comic.)
Thursday was finally nice but cold. The weatherman predicted snow over the weekend.
Arthur cornered Alfred after school in the locker room. Everybody else had already left. "You haven't answered my texts," Arthur scolded, hands on Alfred's shoulders. "It's very rude of you, Jones."
Alfred just snorted. "So what?" He replied.
"Alfred. Just listen to me for once, okay?"
"Why should I…"
"Because what I'm offering you is beneficial for the both of us."
Alfred gave Arthur a look that clearly said 'Go on'.
"Last Friday…at your place…when we, you know…It felt good didn't it?" Arthur wet his lips, staring at Alfred's Adam's apple as the other swallowed thickly.
"It did," Alfred finally admitted.
Arthur grinned. "I knew you didn't like it, old chum. Now…imagine if we could achieve that feeling again? But this time, naked maybe."
Alfred sucked in a breath as a mental image of a naked Arthur flashed in his mind. "Sex?" Was all he could manage out.
The shorter boy shrugged. "Maybe. Eventually. This is strictly a friends with benefits type of thing, mind you."
Alfred nodded. "Of course," He agreed, poking Arthur in the chest. "You breathe a word of this to anyone and I'll whoop your ass into the next millennium, Kirkland."
Arthur just grinned devilishly. "The same, Jones."
______________________________________________________________________________
A/N: So. This is the first fic I've written in a couple of years and my first fic ever for Hetalia.
It's cross-posted at FF.net under the username blahblahyourmom.
Con-crit would be delightful.
Author/Artist: blahblahyourmom
Character(s) or Pairing(s): America, England, Russia, Japan,
Rating: M
Warnings: Underage sex, cursing, gay sex, slight dub-con? Maybe OOC-ness? IDK.
Summary: The romantic, humorous, and dramatic life of Alfred F. Jones as he navigates from high school into college and the real world. It doesn't help that his ex-best friend/fuckenemy is going to college in the same area as Alfred too. And then there's that hot annoying bakery owner later on....
Arthur calling Captain America a 'bloody git in tights' was the last straw for Alfred.
Full 8 year old fury was put into one punch to the other boy's nose. Within moments they were rolling around on the ground kicking and punching in the middle of a crowd of students cheering them on.
It took four teachers to pull them apart and two more to herd the rest of the spectators off.
Alfred was given a week of suspension. Arthur, two days.
When he came back to school the black eye he proudly sported was still there, not as prominent as it had been the first few days, but still there. Alfred felt like a war hero despite being ground for a whole month from his comic books and Nintendo. The comic books weren't so bad because Kiku snuck them to him during recess, but having to sit and watch his twin brother Mattie fail at getting through the first round of Donkey Kong was pure torture.
Torture with a capital 'T'.
He spent the next couple of weeks at recess wandering aimlessly and pointedly not looking at Arthur (who'd seemed to recover quickly and had glided over to Toris, Toris's weird friend Feliks, and Heracles). Occasionally Alfred would join Kiku and try to sit still for the next twenty minutes and read comic books or manga with him. Over time, it grew easier to sit still and Kiku even started teaching him how to draw.
This led to hanging out at one another's house every other weekend and pretty soon they decided they were best friends.
Good thing they'd lived down the block from each other for practically their whole lives (even though their dads often clashed because Alfred's dad was kind of loud and boisterous like Alfred often was). Their mothers bonded over gardening and Mattie often hung out with Alfred and Kiku on occasion when he wasn't busy with Rafael (who hated Alfred and vice versa).
And so the years passed.
They all grew up. Graduated grammar school and moved onto high school. Alfred was into sports, yet couldn't help liking art. He tried everything, before settling with tennis. It was fun! And great with getting stress out of the way.
Alfred was even good at drawing and sculpting and painting, to his (and Matt's and their parents) surprise. They were even more surprised when he announced he was going to apply to art school with Kiku. A bigger surprise was Matt announcing he was going to join the Marines after high school. Even Kiku was shocked at that.
He liked drawing comic books the best. So did Kiku. All through high school they worked on a little comic project together that was actually pretty awesome. The only person that didn't like it was Arthur but Alfred claimed it was only because Arthur hated him.
Alfred hated him back too. Especially when Arthur had come back from living in England during their 8th grade year with a stupid accent. Alfred cited it as the cause of a few of their many fights.
Oh yes. They still fought to the amusement of their peers.
They had weekly brawls that they tried to keep off of school grounds up until sophomore year of high school. That year, around Thanksgiving, Arthur had gone over to the Jones residence when Matt was at hockey practice and Mr. and Mrs. Jones were out of state visiting a sick, ailing relative. Alfred hadn't even invited the fake limey bastard.
"The fuck are you doing in my house?" Was his way of greeting his former best friend, not even looking up from his video game. Though it was more "Thmf fumfck ahrewe yew dowumfingd und meumf huff?" because Alfred had his mouth full of burger.
Arthur had just sneered at him and launched into one of his usual tirades about Alfred's eating habits. "Seriously, you're going to end up obese and with heart problems in the end…"
Offering a quick prayer to the fast food gods, Alfred threw the rest of the burger at him which caused the other boy to dive out of the way with a high pitched shriek.
"What was that for, you bloody git?" Arthur demanded, his voice high pitched. "Because you're a uptight bastard, dude," Alfred replied coolly, too immersed in his video game. "And your voice is annoying," He added, rolling his eyes.
Arthur stood there seething, fists clenched. Had he been a cartoon character his face would have been boiling with rage.
"You….You…" He choked out as he took short halting steps towards Alfred, getting in the way of him and the TV.
"Fuck! Dude!" Alfred yelped, trying to see around him. "The fuck are you doing?"
Arthur turned the TV off despite Alfred's protests before stepping closer to the other boy. He took the video game controller and threw it to the side. In a flash he pulled Alfred up by the front of his shirt.
"You…You don't…" Arthur said haltingly before crashing his lips against Alfred's. The taller boy resisted, trying to shove his former friend off for a good few long moments before he gave in.
"This doesn't change anything," He murmured as he pulled Arthur down onto the couch, hands roaming down to the other boy's waist. It was amusing to him that Arthur had ended up smaller than he. Amusing, indeed.
"Like hell it doesn't," Arthur snarled back, digging his nails into Alfred's back. He scratched, neither gently nor harshly. "I want to fuck you."
Alfred snorted as he shook his head. "Fuck no. If anyone was going to be doing that it would be me," He vehemently insisted despite that he sounded a bit uncertain.
Sex, surprisingly enough, was something that rarely crossed his mind. He had the occasional wet dream, of course, but aside from that he barely thought about it. Or if it came up in any of his video games or comic books.
"I. Will. Fuck. You," Arthur simply growled, digging his fingers into Alfred's arms. The taller boy yelped out a bit from the pain. Arthur just grinned as he slipped a hand up Alfred's shirt and-
There was a knock on the door. Alfred shoved Arthur away as he sprang up to go and answer it.
"Not so fast," Arthur said, grabbing the other boy's arm. (What the hell? How the fuck was he so strong?) "Leave it. It's probably a delivery person."
There was another knock. "It could be someone wanting to visit my mom," Alfred whined, slapping the hand going up his shirt away. Arthur scowled before yielding and slumping back onto the couch.
Alfred answered the door. Like Arthur had predicted, it was a delivery man. Alfred signed for the package, Matt's special maple syrup from Canada probably, and tossed the package to the side after closing the door.
"See?" Arthur smugly grinned when Alfred was seated next to him again. The grin was wiped off of his face with a punch to the jaw.
The punch led to Arthur tackling Alfred off the couch. The tackling led to fighting which led to the two former friends drying humping each other until they each came into their pants.
Arthur was the first to react. "You git! Look what you made me do!" He made a face as he looked down at his pants. "It's what you wanted, didn't you?" Alfred innocently replied as he shoved the other off of him and stood up. Euck.
Arthur left after they cleaned themselves up. Alfred spent the rest of the day playing his video games until Matthew came home. Their parents returned home a couple hours later, arguing of course, thus the twins retreated to their bedrooms.
Alfred dozed off as he read a book for English with his Ipod blaring. He didn't know how much time had passed until vibrations signaling a text on his cell phone jolted him from that state and he fumbled to pull it out and check to see whom the text was from. He frowned for he didn't recognize the number.
'Oi.'
Ah, Arthur.
'What.' Alfred yawned as he texted back, sitting up and glancing at his alarm clock. 9:30. Dayum.
'How about we hang around my place tomorrow? My parents will be out.'
'No. Fuck off.' Alfred turned his phone off and set it on his nightstand before attempting to read the book again.
He didn't answer Arthur's texts for the rest of the weekend, only bothering to look at one to put his number into his phone. The text was filled with a string of expletives anyway.
_____________________________________________________________________________________
Monday it rained. Alfred got detention for sleeping during class. (He couldn't sleep the night before on account of thinking about what he and Arthur had done Friday afternoon. Did it mean he was gay? Not that he had a problem with being gay at all.)
Tuesday it rained. (Still thought about it. Sucked not being able to ask Matt his opinion.)
Wednesday it rained. (Only thought about it for two hours. Drew a comic about it and then burned said comic.)
Thursday was finally nice but cold. The weatherman predicted snow over the weekend.
Arthur cornered Alfred after school in the locker room. Everybody else had already left. "You haven't answered my texts," Arthur scolded, hands on Alfred's shoulders. "It's very rude of you, Jones."
Alfred just snorted. "So what?" He replied.
"Alfred. Just listen to me for once, okay?"
"Why should I…"
"Because what I'm offering you is beneficial for the both of us."
Alfred gave Arthur a look that clearly said 'Go on'.
"Last Friday…at your place…when we, you know…It felt good didn't it?" Arthur wet his lips, staring at Alfred's Adam's apple as the other swallowed thickly.
"It did," Alfred finally admitted.
Arthur grinned. "I knew you didn't like it, old chum. Now…imagine if we could achieve that feeling again? But this time, naked maybe."
Alfred sucked in a breath as a mental image of a naked Arthur flashed in his mind. "Sex?" Was all he could manage out.
The shorter boy shrugged. "Maybe. Eventually. This is strictly a friends with benefits type of thing, mind you."
Alfred nodded. "Of course," He agreed, poking Arthur in the chest. "You breathe a word of this to anyone and I'll whoop your ass into the next millennium, Kirkland."
Arthur just grinned devilishly. "The same, Jones."
______________________________________________________________________________
A/N: So. This is the first fic I've written in a couple of years and my first fic ever for Hetalia.
It's cross-posted at FF.net under the username blahblahyourmom.
Con-crit would be delightful.