Apr 20, 2004 00:37
The many obscene ways to kill yourself (and others)
Written by: ME! Lynne, and Mat!
WARNING dont try this at home!
1.Bowling ball to your head.
2. Kill yourself in your mothers bed
3. Kill your self on the toilet after taking a huge shit
4. Hang yourself in the shower
5. Hang yourself over your grandmothers bed, holding a bowling ball so in those last moments when u are choking she will wake up to see the bowling ball fall from your dead limp fingers onto her head killing her
6. Suicide party
7. Kill yourself under moms bed so they wonder were you are and then smell your rotting corpse...
8. Curbing yourself with a bowling ball
9. Hang yourself as the star on your christmas tree
10. Crucify yourself on the front door
11. Hang yourself as the star on SOMEONE ELSES christmas tree.
12. Masturbate with a pregnant lobster.
13. Dress up someone in a KKK suit saying "death to all niggas" on it and shove them on the streets of Harlem
14.Eat cabbage and beans and lock yourself in an airtight room and Boom you suffocate in your own stench..
15. Take alot of pills and crawl in the oven...
16. Chop off one limb at a time hiding them in special places like "sisters pillows' and in "ground beef" that your family is using for dinner later
17. Feed the family dog one of your toes and leave a suicide note where someone wont find it for quite some time saying "By the way the dog thats been licking your face for all these months...ate my toe"
18. Cut off your toes, labeled with your address with note attached "Please return to owner" and shove them in balloons releasing them into the sky so when the pop its raining toes.
19. Ya know the message in a bottle do a limb in a bottle.
20. Catch a few turkeys and lock yourself in a room with them until they peck you to death
21. skin yourself
22. See how long it takes you to chew your arm off.
23.Drink 27 bottles of cocacola...and drown.
24.Drink a bunch of colorful nailpolish then cut open your stomach and watch the pretty colors..as you die.
25. Become blood brothers with someone with aids./Get aids and ask people to be your blood brother
26. Hang yourself near an airvent in school, your body covered in anthrax...it will take out the whole school.
27. Threaten to bomb The Voke and as all of those kids are running down to Wakefield high to escape blow up wakefield high killing both schools.
28.PuNK Sk8eR 4lyf: or wile som1 stands in a crosswalk as a bus comes by trip them so they fall and there head goes under the tire (thanks eddy)
29. Get hit by a car while streaking on a highway
30. Read this list.