This was a random curse entry, i no longer feel that way....and sorry to all the people i hurt, i was in a lot of pain i guess i just wanted to hurt others, god im a screw up...sorry again, if that helps....
you can still come if you want. i dont mind, neither do the rest of us by much. just watch what you say when you say it or it'll bite you in the ass later. im not thinking about the past right now, and i dont wanna return to it. im not saying anything about it. you can talk about the bad moments in the past, but im not gonna think about iot. its been dealt with and bullshit, and im not gonna let i bother me. just so you know.
david has been the 3rd person today asking if we're talking. people can see it. ari and the others too. they're not stupid. we have to talk about stuff later.
and yesterday hurt me. i never thought you'd get angry enough to stump to a low level and write that in my LJ, change the password to OUR account, and call me a self-pitying bitch and bring other people into this. i dont want my trust to waver with you at all. but yesterday really brought that down. make sure it never happens again. please? =(
yea i said im sorry, and i know everyone is pissed off at me so im just gonna back off ok? and if u dont trust me anymore then fine...i dont know what else to do...
and u cant even BEGIN to imagine what anger had to be coursing through my brains to let alone even CONSIDER doing that to your LJ and actually doing it, cuz u know im not like that...you KNOW and i KNOW you know....but whatever...maybe im wrong...
regardless, it still hurt. like i trust you and all, but a part of me keeps telling me to be careful because do you gurantee that it wont happen again? i hope so. but yes, i still trust you, but part of me is kinda afraid that you'll blow up on me again.
i think all they wanna know is that you're sorry and wont do it ever again. they've been wondering whats up with you lately, and i dunno what to tell them, so i just say "i dunno" but then they say "but you guys are best friends, how come you dont hang out anymore" that hurts. that hurts to hear. people can see it, and we aren't communicating. we should. please talk to me, i miss you. =(
i do miss you. i've missed you since we first started fighting in september. and the other part saddens me also. i cried about it one day. that you really think that of him and me. thats DOES hurt. like when you asked me to choose between you and him. that...i thought nothing would EVER stump so low. anywho, not the point...
why only for me? and why do you feel detached from us? they talk to you and all, but like i said; they wonder whats going on with you. you're attitude has changed. like with all the fights and stuff and some of the things you've said. but if you wanna remain friends with them, you're gonna have to talk to them. PLEASE MARZ, LETS NOT GET THIS ANY WORSE.
what do u mean my attitude is different? so what do u want me to do? and i NEVER asked u to choose between us, and if i did i was prolly mad...and i dont mean things when im mad, especially yesterday....ESPECIALLY yesterday, that was like, malice...indescribable...
-the only way i'll be your friend is if you break up with him, i will never forgive you for doing that. -he's the retard that has made you stupid and a hypocrit. ITS HIS FAULT -you've become everything i hate -you disgust me; i hate you -i hope you cry BAD every fucking day -you're just this self-pity bitch thats full of shit
i dont wanna go on. even though you said all those things. its built up a lot of stuff. but please dont ever do that again. i dont want this freindship going to waste. promise me NOW that we'll remain friends, because yesterday was a little nerve-racking. it was like a repeat of that other fucked-bitch. dont do that please. i dont want to fight anymore PLEASE.
the stress is ripping me to pieces, and i cant hide it very well. mario and debbs noticed instantly. can we stop fighting and shit? im BEGGING.
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david has been the 3rd person today asking if we're talking. people can see it. ari and the others too. they're not stupid. we have to talk about stuff later.
and yesterday hurt me. i never thought you'd get angry enough to stump to a low level and write that in my LJ, change the password to OUR account, and call me a self-pitying bitch and bring other people into this. i dont want my trust to waver with you at all. but yesterday really brought that down. make sure it never happens again. please? =(
--*dee
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and u cant even BEGIN to imagine what anger had to be coursing through my brains to let alone even CONSIDER doing that to your LJ and actually doing it, cuz u know im not like that...you KNOW and i KNOW you know....but whatever...maybe im wrong...
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i think all they wanna know is that you're sorry and wont do it ever again. they've been wondering whats up with you lately, and i dunno what to tell them, so i just say "i dunno" but then they say "but you guys are best friends, how come you dont hang out anymore" that hurts. that hurts to hear. people can see it, and we aren't communicating. we should. please talk to me, i miss you. =(
--*dee
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and i did talk to them, and if i go, it'll only be for you....but then you're gonna be talking to them so..plus i dont have money...
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i do miss you. i've missed you since we first started fighting in september. and the other part saddens me also. i cried about it one day. that you really think that of him and me. thats DOES hurt. like when you asked me to choose between you and him. that...i thought nothing would EVER stump so low. anywho, not the point...
why only for me? and why do you feel detached from us? they talk to you and all, but like i said; they wonder whats going on with you. you're attitude has changed. like with all the fights and stuff and some of the things you've said. but if you wanna remain friends with them, you're gonna have to talk to them. PLEASE MARZ, LETS NOT GET THIS ANY WORSE.
--*dee
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-the only way i'll be your friend is if you break up with him, i will never forgive you for doing that.
-he's the retard that has made you stupid and a hypocrit. ITS HIS FAULT
-you've become everything i hate
-you disgust me; i hate you
-i hope you cry BAD every fucking day
-you're just this self-pity bitch thats full of shit
i dont wanna go on. even though you said all those things. its built up a lot of stuff. but please dont ever do that again. i dont want this freindship going to waste. promise me NOW that we'll remain friends, because yesterday was a little nerve-racking. it was like a repeat of that other fucked-bitch. dont do that please. i dont want to fight anymore PLEASE.
the stress is ripping me to pieces, and i cant hide it very well. mario and debbs noticed instantly. can we stop fighting and shit? im BEGGING.
Reply
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