i've always disliked blueberries,
but the other night i had a very mashed up leftover piece of blueberry pie that had been sitting in our fridge and i thoroughly. enjoyed it.
i still don't like vegetables, and i worry about that a lot. i eat very unhealthily as far as fruits and vegetables are concerned. what am i going to do when i have a baby? it is going to be exposed to so much crap during my pregnancy, just because i cannot force myself to eat things that i find unpalatable. i am not the type of person who can grin and bear it and do things i am uncomfortable with doing to my body, like swallowing pills.
i am having the most difficult time achieving balance. it is especially easy to do in the summertime. i have become very involved with myself, in just sitting at home and reading or watching tv or playing the piano. sometimes i completely forget about people. i never call people, which is very self-absorbed and self-serving. who cares if i dislike the phone? i care about my friends, and i should reach out to them. maybe the reason i'm not exceptionally close to most people is because they can't tell i enjoy their company.
is anyone really all the way adjusted? i spent so many nights sitting in this chair, tearing up while staring at a computer screen or looking out a window, but all this while am i shooting for something realistic? if i stopped trying to better myself, would that make more sense? would i be more approachable, more easy to talk to, better to know? am i supposed to ignore all of these things i am constantly thinking; do i just dwell on things that no one else does, and they don't for a reason?
ridiculous.
haha, this kid sean mccarthy sat next to me in health and i heard him say, "my favorite word is ridiculous" and he said it perfectly and i completely agreed, in my head.
anyway.
i enjoy garden state more each time i watch it. i just want to keep watching, because i don't know if it is, but everything just seems exceptionally real to me.
either way, goodnight.
i still don't like vegetables, and i worry about that a lot. i eat very unhealthily as far as fruits and vegetables are concerned. what am i going to do when i have a baby? it is going to be exposed to so much crap during my pregnancy, just because i cannot force myself to eat things that i find unpalatable. i am not the type of person who can grin and bear it and do things i am uncomfortable with doing to my body, like swallowing pills.
i am having the most difficult time achieving balance. it is especially easy to do in the summertime. i have become very involved with myself, in just sitting at home and reading or watching tv or playing the piano. sometimes i completely forget about people. i never call people, which is very self-absorbed and self-serving. who cares if i dislike the phone? i care about my friends, and i should reach out to them. maybe the reason i'm not exceptionally close to most people is because they can't tell i enjoy their company.
is anyone really all the way adjusted? i spent so many nights sitting in this chair, tearing up while staring at a computer screen or looking out a window, but all this while am i shooting for something realistic? if i stopped trying to better myself, would that make more sense? would i be more approachable, more easy to talk to, better to know? am i supposed to ignore all of these things i am constantly thinking; do i just dwell on things that no one else does, and they don't for a reason?
ridiculous.
haha, this kid sean mccarthy sat next to me in health and i heard him say, "my favorite word is ridiculous" and he said it perfectly and i completely agreed, in my head.
anyway.
i enjoy garden state more each time i watch it. i just want to keep watching, because i don't know if it is, but everything just seems exceptionally real to me.
either way, goodnight.