He haunts me in my dreams...

May 16, 2004 10:55

I can't stand seeing people i used to love everywhere. I just cant stand it. Im like the psyco bitch that cant understand that the world is never going to change for me. Or anyone. Everyones self centered and all most guys think about is sex. AH Poop. I want to lose weight.. i dont like myself.. not like ill ever be happy.. youre only happy when you dont "want" things.. my head hurts... people lie too much.. i am losing lots of friends... dont lie.
Natoshas party was fun.. Me, Rosa, Maddie and Shawndra were there..just sorta hung out and talked.. then watched some movie called : Ive been waiting for you : and it was really not scary.. haha
I am going to join the Explorers program. I used to wanna be a detective, and before that you have to be a police officer.. and so i know this guy whos a cop and he was talking about me joining.. You ride around in police cars.. yeah exciting.. it may put me in danger..cool.
I drempt about him and i think i am going to stick a knife through my head the next time i do. I really want to forget about him.. and I really hate her.. a lot.. and i cant help it..
I dont like people who lie to a whole ton of people and its only me who knows..
Maybe what i am doing right now is not right.. maybe i should leave this town and run forever..
Today is not a good day.
50+ debate cards
Extra credit math
And history Journals.
And my room is a mess..
I am busy today..
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