Purple Paint Fumes
So lets get started, shall we? So much fun yesterday, ever so much. man. alright so. started out wakin up around 8:00 cause i coulnt sleep anymore, talked to Debbie (ambers mum) a little on aim till around 8:30 when she went to wake Amber up and such. then i talked to amber till like 9ish and she went to take a shower and i got ready to paint and such. then she came over around 10:30ish and we had to help my parents tape stuff down and yeah. So then jen showed up around 12:00 and tara and bill came around 1:15 and after that it was really cool lol.
i think bill upset amber a little bit tho. . . with some of his jokes. Tara, jen, amber, and i were layin on my bed, amber and i kept getting ineterupted haha (-innocent cough-). Bill was just sitting there in my chair, making slightly annoying comments about things in my room, but overall it was good. That was till he decided to throw my hackeysack at Amber and make a crude joke. yeah. she just sat up and chucked it right back. SO amsuzing. (-claps-). Now i make it sound like Bill was all bad during this eventfull day. but i havent even told you about the painting yet, he was acctually pretty good.
So im doin this out of order, my appologies. Right. Well they all showed up and we went in and did the base coat on the walls, which just happened to be white. needless to say many comments were made about bill and the walls and the whiteness of it all. Im just glad more comments werent made about me and him,cause if they were, Amber wouldnt have been the only one slightly upset by him. There would have been much more than a hackeysack hitting him, and it would be someplace he thinks highly of. So we finished that, and went downstairs to clean the brushes, and tara had to wack off the rollers, seemed she knew what she was doing -giggles-. Right so it rained on us out there too. So we went inside and got something to eat, cold fried chicken, chips, crappy geucaimolie (ak fuckit, i cant spell that word, there is my best attempt) and watched LoTR 3, or at least part of it.
Then we went back upstairs, jen and i changed our clothes yet again (i got paint on BOTH ambers shirts -grumbles-) and we went in and did the Purple layer. Oh the best colour ever. Bill kept getting mad at amber and i for kissing. screw him lol. Oh somewhere in the white paint stuff we took a "5 minuet break" which really turned out to be more like 20, during which the hackeysack was thrown, yeah. So we finished the first coat, got lazy and didnt do the second coat, and chilled and changed again.
Then something amazing happened. After jen went home and tara left to take bill home, my mom let me take a shower with amber in my room, on my computer. So yeah. That was interesting. (sorry allie, i felt it had to be said) Amber is really good at distracting me from what i was sposed to be doing. >_< aka talking to mary, lol. Right. so i gotta go do my homework now, cause. . . my mom is being annoying. But she informed me that today we have to burry my dogs ashes. wondeful. and she doesnt want Amber to come over and help us paint. im just like come ON woman! make me burry my dog and dont let me see my friends. great. you are aiding in my anti-depression, REALLY! -mumbles- right. so my mood kinda went down after she told me that, but ill tell you that i was UBER happy last night.
OH! SIMONS PARTY! i almost forgot. So much fun. Webber humped everything in sight, which sadly enough included me -shudders compusivly- Never. Never again. ewwww. But Lizzie acctaully talked to me! -feels special- she wants me to bring Amber to the mall today for her to meet, so i am gonna try to work that in, but if not ill just take Amber to coldstone when Lizzie and Jen are working.
drink up me hearties yo ho!
How the Grinch Stole Marriage
by Mary Ann Horton, Lisa and Bill Koontz
(with apologies to Dr. Suess.)
Every Gay down in Gayville liked Gay Marriage a lot......
But the Grinch, who lived just east of Gayville, did NOT!!
The Grinch hated happy Gays! The whole Marriage season!
Now, please don't ask why. No one quite knows the reason.
It could be his head wasn't screwed on just right.
It could be, perhaps, his Florsheims were too tight.
But I think the most likely reason of all was
His heart and brain were two sizes too small.
"And they're buying their tuxes!" he snarled with a sneer,
"Tomorrow's the first Gay Wedding! It's practically here!"
Then he growled, with his Grinch fingers nervously drumming,
"I MUST find some way to stop Gay Marriage from coming!"
For, tomorrow, he knew... All the Gay girls and boys
would wake bright and early. They'd rush for their vows!
And then! Oh, the Joys! Oh, the Joys!
And THEN they'd do something he liked least of all!
Every Gay down in Gayville the tall and the small,
would stand close together, all happy and blissing.
They'd stand hand-in-hand. And the Gays would start kissing!
"I MUST stop Gay Marriage from coming! ...But HOW?"
Then he got an idea! An awful idea!
THE GRINCH GOT A WONDERFUL, AWFUL IDEA!
"I know what to do!" The Grinch laughed in his throat.
And he went to his closet, grabbed his sheet and his hood.
And he chuckled, and clucked, with a great Grinchy word!
"With this beard and this cross, I look just like our Lord!"
"All I need is a Scripture..." The Grinch looked around.
But, true Scripture is scarce, there was none to be found.
Did that stop the old Grinch...? No! The Grinch simply said,
"With no Scripture on Marriage, I'll fake one instead!"
"It's one man and one woman," the Grinch falsely said.
Then he broke in the courthouse. A rather tight pinch.
But, if Georgie could do it, then so could the Grinch.
The little Gay benefits hung in a row.
"These bennies," he grinned, "are the first things to go!"
Then he slithered and slunk, with a smile most uncanny,
around the whole room, and he took every benny!
Health care for partners! Doctors for kiddies!
Tax rights! Adoptions! Pensions and Wills!
And he stuffed them in bags. Then the Grinch, with a chill,
Stuffed all the bags, one by one, in his bill.
Then he slunk to the kitchen, and stole Wedding Cake.
He cleaned out that icebox and made it look straight.
He took the Gay-bar keys! He took the Gay Flag.
Why, that Grinch even took their last Gay birdseed bag!
"And NOW!" grinned the Grinch, "I will pocket their Rings."
And the Grinch grabbed the Rings, and he started to shove
when he heard a small sound like the coo of a dove.
He turned around fast, and off flew his hood.
Little Lisa-Bi Gay behind him sadly stood.
The Grinch had been caught by small Lisa-Bi.
She stared at the Grinch and said, "My, oh, my, why?"
"Why are you taking our Wedding Rings? WHY?"
But, you know, that old Grinch was so smart and so slick
He thought up a lie, and he thought it up quick!
"Why, my sweet little tot," the fake Shepherd sneered,
"The judges are evil, the other states weird."
"I'll fix the rings there and I'll bring them back here."
It was quarter past dawn... All the Gays, still a-bed,
all the Gays still a-snooze when he packed up and fled.
"Pooh-Pooh to the Gays!" he was grinch-ish-ly humming.
"They're finding out now no Gay Marriage is coming!"
"Their mouths will hang open a minute or two
then the Gays down in Gayville will all cry Boo-Hoo!"
He stared down at Gayville! The Grinch popped his eyes!
Then he shook! What he saw was a shocking surprise!
Every Gay down in Gayville, the tall and the small,
was kissing! Without any bennies at all!
He HADN'T stopped Marriage from coming! IT CAME!
Somehow or other, it came just the same!
And the Grinch, with his grinch-feet ice-cold in the snow,
stood puzzling and puzzling: "How could it be so?"
"It came without lawyers, no papers to sort!"
"It came without licenses, came without courts!"
And he puzzled three hours, till his puzzler was sore.
Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before!
"Maybe Marriage," he thought, "doesn't come from the court.
Maybe Marriage...perhaps... comes right from the heart.
Maybe Marriage comes from all the words the Gays say.
Words like Husband, like Wedding, and Spouse who is Gay."
And what happened then...? Well...in Gayville they say
that the Grinch's small brain grew three sizes that day!
And the Gays had their Weddings. They promised for life.
They swore to be faithful, to Wife and her Wife.
The Husbands were happy, to each other they vowed
To be Out and be Honest, be Gay and be Proud.
They told all their neighbors and friends of their Spouse,
They told of their Marriage and sharing their house.
They said "We got Married." They shouted it loud.
Their marital status was "Married and Proud."
And the minute his heart didn't feel quite so tight,
He whizzed with his load through the bright morning light.
And he brought back the rings, cake and Gay birdseed bags!
And he... ...HE HIMSELF... hung the Gay Rainbow Flag!
...
The Lord looked down, at the proud and the tall,
and said "These are my children, and I love them all."
The moral of this story is that we don't need a piece of paper and the
approval of the state to get married. We can just get married. Instead
of having a committment ceremony, we can have a wedding. Instead of
partners, we can have husbands and wives. Instead of calling our
relationship a Domestic Partnership or a Civil Union, we can call it a
Marriage. Whether any government recognizes it is separate from what we
call it. It's a free country and we can call ourselves what we like.
In 5 or 10 or 20 years, with plenty of visible same-sex married
couples, the world won't see us as strange or scary, we're just the
married couple down the street that happens to be gay. Eventually, the
legal recognization of our marriages will follow.
If we allow ourselves to voluntarily sit in the back of the bus, we'll
never make any progress. Rosa Parks had to sit in the front of the bus
to make a difference. We must as well.
Copyright (c) 2004 by Mary Ann Horton. Permission granted to copy in
whole, with attribution. This is a parody of "How the Grinch Stole
Christmas."
i think bill upset amber a little bit tho. . . with some of his jokes. Tara, jen, amber, and i were layin on my bed, amber and i kept getting ineterupted haha (-innocent cough-). Bill was just sitting there in my chair, making slightly annoying comments about things in my room, but overall it was good. That was till he decided to throw my hackeysack at Amber and make a crude joke. yeah. she just sat up and chucked it right back. SO amsuzing. (-claps-). Now i make it sound like Bill was all bad during this eventfull day. but i havent even told you about the painting yet, he was acctually pretty good.
So im doin this out of order, my appologies. Right. Well they all showed up and we went in and did the base coat on the walls, which just happened to be white. needless to say many comments were made about bill and the walls and the whiteness of it all. Im just glad more comments werent made about me and him,cause if they were, Amber wouldnt have been the only one slightly upset by him. There would have been much more than a hackeysack hitting him, and it would be someplace he thinks highly of. So we finished that, and went downstairs to clean the brushes, and tara had to wack off the rollers, seemed she knew what she was doing -giggles-. Right so it rained on us out there too. So we went inside and got something to eat, cold fried chicken, chips, crappy geucaimolie (ak fuckit, i cant spell that word, there is my best attempt) and watched LoTR 3, or at least part of it.
Then we went back upstairs, jen and i changed our clothes yet again (i got paint on BOTH ambers shirts -grumbles-) and we went in and did the Purple layer. Oh the best colour ever. Bill kept getting mad at amber and i for kissing. screw him lol. Oh somewhere in the white paint stuff we took a "5 minuet break" which really turned out to be more like 20, during which the hackeysack was thrown, yeah. So we finished the first coat, got lazy and didnt do the second coat, and chilled and changed again.
Then something amazing happened. After jen went home and tara left to take bill home, my mom let me take a shower with amber in my room, on my computer. So yeah. That was interesting. (sorry allie, i felt it had to be said) Amber is really good at distracting me from what i was sposed to be doing. >_< aka talking to mary, lol. Right. so i gotta go do my homework now, cause. . . my mom is being annoying. But she informed me that today we have to burry my dogs ashes. wondeful. and she doesnt want Amber to come over and help us paint. im just like come ON woman! make me burry my dog and dont let me see my friends. great. you are aiding in my anti-depression, REALLY! -mumbles- right. so my mood kinda went down after she told me that, but ill tell you that i was UBER happy last night.
OH! SIMONS PARTY! i almost forgot. So much fun. Webber humped everything in sight, which sadly enough included me -shudders compusivly- Never. Never again. ewwww. But Lizzie acctaully talked to me! -feels special- she wants me to bring Amber to the mall today for her to meet, so i am gonna try to work that in, but if not ill just take Amber to coldstone when Lizzie and Jen are working.
drink up me hearties yo ho!
How the Grinch Stole Marriage
by Mary Ann Horton, Lisa and Bill Koontz
(with apologies to Dr. Suess.)
Every Gay down in Gayville liked Gay Marriage a lot......
But the Grinch, who lived just east of Gayville, did NOT!!
The Grinch hated happy Gays! The whole Marriage season!
Now, please don't ask why. No one quite knows the reason.
It could be his head wasn't screwed on just right.
It could be, perhaps, his Florsheims were too tight.
But I think the most likely reason of all was
His heart and brain were two sizes too small.
"And they're buying their tuxes!" he snarled with a sneer,
"Tomorrow's the first Gay Wedding! It's practically here!"
Then he growled, with his Grinch fingers nervously drumming,
"I MUST find some way to stop Gay Marriage from coming!"
For, tomorrow, he knew... All the Gay girls and boys
would wake bright and early. They'd rush for their vows!
And then! Oh, the Joys! Oh, the Joys!
And THEN they'd do something he liked least of all!
Every Gay down in Gayville the tall and the small,
would stand close together, all happy and blissing.
They'd stand hand-in-hand. And the Gays would start kissing!
"I MUST stop Gay Marriage from coming! ...But HOW?"
Then he got an idea! An awful idea!
THE GRINCH GOT A WONDERFUL, AWFUL IDEA!
"I know what to do!" The Grinch laughed in his throat.
And he went to his closet, grabbed his sheet and his hood.
And he chuckled, and clucked, with a great Grinchy word!
"With this beard and this cross, I look just like our Lord!"
"All I need is a Scripture..." The Grinch looked around.
But, true Scripture is scarce, there was none to be found.
Did that stop the old Grinch...? No! The Grinch simply said,
"With no Scripture on Marriage, I'll fake one instead!"
"It's one man and one woman," the Grinch falsely said.
Then he broke in the courthouse. A rather tight pinch.
But, if Georgie could do it, then so could the Grinch.
The little Gay benefits hung in a row.
"These bennies," he grinned, "are the first things to go!"
Then he slithered and slunk, with a smile most uncanny,
around the whole room, and he took every benny!
Health care for partners! Doctors for kiddies!
Tax rights! Adoptions! Pensions and Wills!
And he stuffed them in bags. Then the Grinch, with a chill,
Stuffed all the bags, one by one, in his bill.
Then he slunk to the kitchen, and stole Wedding Cake.
He cleaned out that icebox and made it look straight.
He took the Gay-bar keys! He took the Gay Flag.
Why, that Grinch even took their last Gay birdseed bag!
"And NOW!" grinned the Grinch, "I will pocket their Rings."
And the Grinch grabbed the Rings, and he started to shove
when he heard a small sound like the coo of a dove.
He turned around fast, and off flew his hood.
Little Lisa-Bi Gay behind him sadly stood.
The Grinch had been caught by small Lisa-Bi.
She stared at the Grinch and said, "My, oh, my, why?"
"Why are you taking our Wedding Rings? WHY?"
But, you know, that old Grinch was so smart and so slick
He thought up a lie, and he thought it up quick!
"Why, my sweet little tot," the fake Shepherd sneered,
"The judges are evil, the other states weird."
"I'll fix the rings there and I'll bring them back here."
It was quarter past dawn... All the Gays, still a-bed,
all the Gays still a-snooze when he packed up and fled.
"Pooh-Pooh to the Gays!" he was grinch-ish-ly humming.
"They're finding out now no Gay Marriage is coming!"
"Their mouths will hang open a minute or two
then the Gays down in Gayville will all cry Boo-Hoo!"
He stared down at Gayville! The Grinch popped his eyes!
Then he shook! What he saw was a shocking surprise!
Every Gay down in Gayville, the tall and the small,
was kissing! Without any bennies at all!
He HADN'T stopped Marriage from coming! IT CAME!
Somehow or other, it came just the same!
And the Grinch, with his grinch-feet ice-cold in the snow,
stood puzzling and puzzling: "How could it be so?"
"It came without lawyers, no papers to sort!"
"It came without licenses, came without courts!"
And he puzzled three hours, till his puzzler was sore.
Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before!
"Maybe Marriage," he thought, "doesn't come from the court.
Maybe Marriage...perhaps... comes right from the heart.
Maybe Marriage comes from all the words the Gays say.
Words like Husband, like Wedding, and Spouse who is Gay."
And what happened then...? Well...in Gayville they say
that the Grinch's small brain grew three sizes that day!
And the Gays had their Weddings. They promised for life.
They swore to be faithful, to Wife and her Wife.
The Husbands were happy, to each other they vowed
To be Out and be Honest, be Gay and be Proud.
They told all their neighbors and friends of their Spouse,
They told of their Marriage and sharing their house.
They said "We got Married." They shouted it loud.
Their marital status was "Married and Proud."
And the minute his heart didn't feel quite so tight,
He whizzed with his load through the bright morning light.
And he brought back the rings, cake and Gay birdseed bags!
And he... ...HE HIMSELF... hung the Gay Rainbow Flag!
...
The Lord looked down, at the proud and the tall,
and said "These are my children, and I love them all."
The moral of this story is that we don't need a piece of paper and the
approval of the state to get married. We can just get married. Instead
of having a committment ceremony, we can have a wedding. Instead of
partners, we can have husbands and wives. Instead of calling our
relationship a Domestic Partnership or a Civil Union, we can call it a
Marriage. Whether any government recognizes it is separate from what we
call it. It's a free country and we can call ourselves what we like.
In 5 or 10 or 20 years, with plenty of visible same-sex married
couples, the world won't see us as strange or scary, we're just the
married couple down the street that happens to be gay. Eventually, the
legal recognization of our marriages will follow.
If we allow ourselves to voluntarily sit in the back of the bus, we'll
never make any progress. Rosa Parks had to sit in the front of the bus
to make a difference. We must as well.
Copyright (c) 2004 by Mary Ann Horton. Permission granted to copy in
whole, with attribution. This is a parody of "How the Grinch Stole
Christmas."