Wow
Today has been one of the most depressing days I've had in a while. This morning I woke up and just felt bad because my voice still hurts from last night. I went to the cafeteria and sat down and when Melissa Morisson came back from getting her food she goes "Get out of my seat!" and I was like, "Well can't you just find another one?" And she goes "No!" and so I scooted over so we could share and i go "Here we can share it" and she goes "Get out of my seat" and flipped the chair over. I got up and just walked away and I swear I was about to burst into tears. I went and sat by Mia and Christina. Then today at CHS I was walking back to Joan's car to get my laptop cuz we had a study day in choir and when I walked back these guys were at the end of the hall and they go "Look it's a female!!! Girl! Girl! Let's kick her ass!" That made me feel reall really bad. I wasn't scared but it made me feel bad because now all the guys [that were taking challenge day way too seriously] hate the girls and yeah. it just made me feel really bad. After choir I got to see Blake and I gave him a big hug because I felt so shitty. At lunch I read the note he gave me. It was sweat, but for some reason it made me sad because it made me think of him and how he's not with me right now. Then I saw Anna walking by. I looked at her for a few seconds and I even waved, but she didn't see me or pay attention, so I called out her name and she came over and I told her that it was ok with my mom and I could bring her to the Cotillion Dance. Then she was like ok. Then she goes "Bye." In this tone that wasn't friendly, but wasn't mean. And then she walked off. I was alone most of the lunch hour, and it was making me sad. Most of the time it doesn't bother me, but for some reason today it did. Then when Betsy showed up it made me so happy. I like just looked at her though and didn't smile, but I was really really happy and I wanted to give her a big hug. She's sitting down on the ground doing her project cuz she can't get a connection. I don't wanna bother her cuz she's busy. She just said that her legs are numb from sitting on the ground. Makes me smile :-) Betsy is cool. Betsy's like my only close friend that I feel that I can talk to about stuff. Besides Laura but I never get to see her. Elisa is fun to talk to also. She's my swimming buddy. But when I'm with her I'm usually with my sister too so, yeah. Ooo yay! Betsy's playing "The Crimson" by Atreyu! An awesome song and an awesome band! But yeah. I dunno what the rest of the day will bring. I have a Spanish test in 2 hours. I hope that's ok because I didn't study for it. Maybe I'll study for it in religion class. Blah. I hate school!!!!!! Urrrrrrrrrrgh! I just wanna go home and listen to my 80's music and be with Blake. I wrote him a note and as silly as it may have sounded, i was being really serious about it. Ok, I'm gonna go.
-Liz-