its time for a new start
Well, it is time for a new start for me. Yesterday was a turning point. Within 2hrs. I lost 3 friends and one I have loved for the longest time. But it is true i let my heart control more of what i do then what my head does and i do it without thinking about what the out come might be. The one that i love i cant be there for him anymore because it is only when it is convent for him. so all i am is a doormat and i just cant let my heart be broken anymore while he is out there trying to see what is best for him. so i wish him the best of luck. as for my other friend what i thought i was doing was in best intenstion but i just hurt her and maybe my job now but i was pushed to the point of i try to go way out of my way to please people instead of having them accept that i can only do so much and i have to stop trying so hard. so as for her i am so sorry for what i had done and hope someday we can try and be friends again. if not i wish her the best of luck with whatever she does in life. As for my other friend i never thought in the past 6 years after what we had been to eachother and there for eachother as friends for the way he had talked and treated me as if i was nothing more was to be to him a person who was suppose to lay down to him when he says. i was totally floored by it. i mean it hurts but maybe it is now time for a change for me and my life. to see who is out there for me. when i had told michelle and jess about what had happened with all 3. they were understanding. as for my one friend the one with i was trying to have best intenstions they said they would have been mad but understood where my heart was coming from. i have no idea what is laying ahead for me when it comes to my job or school i just know i need to start doing what is best for me and not what people want me to do for them. so to any of my friends who might read this or a stranger. if i have ever done anything to hurt you i am sorry. this is a new day for me and a time for a change. i wish everyone the best of luck in whatever they do.