*unz *unz
I trekked 2 hours (and a bill) to go to Russian River to see him Sunday. And what I got was a huge, humiliating and very visible blow-up in front of hundreds of shirtless gay men over “not texting him back last night.” I told him I was asleep, he said, “that’s what you say.” This feels familiar. Because it’s happened with him once before, and it’s happened to me countless times. But that bout was a few years ago.
I left that party crying, so very disappointed. My companion for the trip hugged me, asked others to hug me, and opened his palm to give me a gift to make it all better. Two little green pills. Again, a few years ago.
When he found me later and apologized, I told him I didn't care, and that I was fucking high. I think I ground up against a neon-strewn black wall after that, either chomping on my 4th apple or lollipop - no literally - but that's besides the point.
I’ve been through a lot of feelings in the past 48 hours. I thought beginning to write about it would surface something insightful. But never mind, I was about to write about drama and flight at a filthy gay circuit party after all. Can't seem to make things like that appear any less vapid.
I left that party crying, so very disappointed. My companion for the trip hugged me, asked others to hug me, and opened his palm to give me a gift to make it all better. Two little green pills. Again, a few years ago.
When he found me later and apologized, I told him I didn't care, and that I was fucking high. I think I ground up against a neon-strewn black wall after that, either chomping on my 4th apple or lollipop - no literally - but that's besides the point.
I’ve been through a lot of feelings in the past 48 hours. I thought beginning to write about it would surface something insightful. But never mind, I was about to write about drama and flight at a filthy gay circuit party after all. Can't seem to make things like that appear any less vapid.