in defense of my foul mouth
Last week a friend of mine visited for a couple hours. At one point we were talking about my experiences with therapy and I found myself using the term “fucked up”.
I realize it was the first time I’ve cussed aloud in some time. While I habitually incorporate cuss words into my writing I rarely use them verbally. Most of my interaction with others is with family or when I’m at work, both situations were swearing would be unacceptable. I found that I quite enjoyed being able to swear aloud.
I have a pretty complex relationship with foul language.
I was raised very strictly never to say “damn” or “oh my god”, much less my favorite curses, “motherfuck” and “cunt”. I was told that using words like this showed you were uneducated or as my parents put it “low class.” In elementary school I would take great offense when my classmates said “Jesus Christ” or “hell”. When teenage rebellion hit however I became very interested in profanity though it probably wasn’t until I went to college that I dared use words like “fuck” in conversation.
When I first started really cussing as a freshman in college I went overboard for a while. I remember visiting my sister (then a senior at Vassar) and every other word out of my mouth being fuck. After a while however I calmed down. I began to regard profanity as a sort of spice, something to season my language with in moderation. These days I cuss sparingly and in a calculated manner but I remain fascinated by other’s use of colorful profanity.
For instance there’s my obsession with Quentin Tarantino. I love his obscenity laden dialogue. I could (and have) listened to it for hours. Recently I’ve been watching the HBO show OZ and I’m riveted by the swearing (while at the same time thanking my lucky stars that my grandmother doesn’t hear so well).
Cursing also plays a role in my dreams. Maybe because I rarely use profanity in day to day life there’s a backlash when I sleep because in my dreams I swear a blue streak. I’m always calling people “cunts” in my dreams. I’ll dream I’m at work in the supermarket and a lady complains about something.
“No need to be a cunt,” I’ll calmly say as I ring up her groceries.
“You cunt,” I’ll hiss at anyone, male or female, who crosses my dream self.
In some ways I feel like my parents denied me a certain level of aggression when they raised me to distain swearing. Also a certain level of joy. When I was at Whole Foods in Chicago the guys I worked with were always talking shit, humping each other, cussing. Profanity was natural to them as a means of expression. I loved watching it, but I was rarely a part of it.
I also adore bawdy music, from double entendre novelty songs to Peaches and Lil’ Kim’s carnal raps. Listening to Christine Aguilera’s new Bionic album I was delighted to discover one of the songs on it, “Woohoo” is all about oral sex. I think “lickey-lickey” is my favorite phrase ever.
I know a lot of people wouldn’t agree but when it comes to profanity I’ve sort of taken the philosophy that it’s part of the richness of the language. When I studied Shakespeare in college we learned that he could write dialogue for any social class and that his writing encompassed several times the average vocabulary. Shakespeare didn’t shun a word because it was what my parents called “low class”, nor did he depend upon it. It was part of the great mosaic of his language. I’m no Shakespeare but over the years I’ve come to feel that there’s room for fuck and cunt in my own mosaic of language.
I realize it was the first time I’ve cussed aloud in some time. While I habitually incorporate cuss words into my writing I rarely use them verbally. Most of my interaction with others is with family or when I’m at work, both situations were swearing would be unacceptable. I found that I quite enjoyed being able to swear aloud.
I have a pretty complex relationship with foul language.
I was raised very strictly never to say “damn” or “oh my god”, much less my favorite curses, “motherfuck” and “cunt”. I was told that using words like this showed you were uneducated or as my parents put it “low class.” In elementary school I would take great offense when my classmates said “Jesus Christ” or “hell”. When teenage rebellion hit however I became very interested in profanity though it probably wasn’t until I went to college that I dared use words like “fuck” in conversation.
When I first started really cussing as a freshman in college I went overboard for a while. I remember visiting my sister (then a senior at Vassar) and every other word out of my mouth being fuck. After a while however I calmed down. I began to regard profanity as a sort of spice, something to season my language with in moderation. These days I cuss sparingly and in a calculated manner but I remain fascinated by other’s use of colorful profanity.
For instance there’s my obsession with Quentin Tarantino. I love his obscenity laden dialogue. I could (and have) listened to it for hours. Recently I’ve been watching the HBO show OZ and I’m riveted by the swearing (while at the same time thanking my lucky stars that my grandmother doesn’t hear so well).
Cursing also plays a role in my dreams. Maybe because I rarely use profanity in day to day life there’s a backlash when I sleep because in my dreams I swear a blue streak. I’m always calling people “cunts” in my dreams. I’ll dream I’m at work in the supermarket and a lady complains about something.
“No need to be a cunt,” I’ll calmly say as I ring up her groceries.
“You cunt,” I’ll hiss at anyone, male or female, who crosses my dream self.
In some ways I feel like my parents denied me a certain level of aggression when they raised me to distain swearing. Also a certain level of joy. When I was at Whole Foods in Chicago the guys I worked with were always talking shit, humping each other, cussing. Profanity was natural to them as a means of expression. I loved watching it, but I was rarely a part of it.
I also adore bawdy music, from double entendre novelty songs to Peaches and Lil’ Kim’s carnal raps. Listening to Christine Aguilera’s new Bionic album I was delighted to discover one of the songs on it, “Woohoo” is all about oral sex. I think “lickey-lickey” is my favorite phrase ever.
I know a lot of people wouldn’t agree but when it comes to profanity I’ve sort of taken the philosophy that it’s part of the richness of the language. When I studied Shakespeare in college we learned that he could write dialogue for any social class and that his writing encompassed several times the average vocabulary. Shakespeare didn’t shun a word because it was what my parents called “low class”, nor did he depend upon it. It was part of the great mosaic of his language. I’m no Shakespeare but over the years I’ve come to feel that there’s room for fuck and cunt in my own mosaic of language.