hello
Hi,
Anyone else make their way back here out of curiosity? I was putting together a memory photo album for my parents which lead to deep digging of my past, most of which I buried when I moved out of state.
Years of therapy helped me to reflect on who I was, and why I acted the way I did as a teen. For some reason, I always come back to think fondly of junior high and the friends that I had when I posted the most on LJ. I regret how I acted most of the time. I didn’t understand my emotions (like most, it takes reflection and the privilege of access to resources like therapy). I was jealous and angry, I wanted to be like my friends, I wanted to have the relationships they had, with their parents... their friends, and most importantly with themselves. I didn’t understand at all at the time, and I dropped off into isolation. Moving away in my early 20s was the greatest thing that happened for my own growth.
Lately I’ve been thinking about you all. I hope you’re doing well. Sometimes I want to find you and reach out, but it’s been nearly 1.5 decades and I’m worried it would be awkward or you don’t care (which is totally understandable, we are all different folks by now).
For me, I moved to California (Bay Area) and finished a bachelor’s degree. I stayed because of the new life I created. I worked at several water agencies and currently working for a city in water conservation. It’s OK, its comfortable. I don’t think I’m finished searching for what makes me happy yet. Maybe we never will. If you’ve found it, let me know. :)
If you ever find yourself digging in your past, and see this post, feel free to reach out. I’d like to hear about your journey, laugh about things, maybe cry haha, and even grab a coffee. I visit Washington a few times a year. Or, if you're in northern California, I'd be happy to meet with you.
Take care,
Emily