2010-2011
2010 sucked balls, and so far 2011 hasn't been that great either.
I had a miscarriage this past month and I have all these feelings and thoughts and no where to put them. It's crazy cos I thought I knew what I wanted and I was so close to having it all. A baby, a husband, and the most gorgeous 2 story house my lil heart could ever desire.
And then, like that- in a flash it was gone.
I knew nothing.
I know I should be patient and understanding and know that IT WAS NOT MEANT TO BE and that God knows something I don't (haha, all things actually) but I still can't help but wondering what his plan is and when it's going to be my turn. and most of all did I do something to deserve this. all of it, all the time. It seems like life never lets up; a blistering magnifying glass of constant disappointment beating down my already pathetic little ant existence.
Still though, it feels nice to write again and get it off my chest.
and yeah this is gonna be short and sweet, not a whole book like ya'll are used to.
I'll try to get back soon. <3
I had a miscarriage this past month and I have all these feelings and thoughts and no where to put them. It's crazy cos I thought I knew what I wanted and I was so close to having it all. A baby, a husband, and the most gorgeous 2 story house my lil heart could ever desire.
And then, like that- in a flash it was gone.
I knew nothing.
I know I should be patient and understanding and know that IT WAS NOT MEANT TO BE and that God knows something I don't (haha, all things actually) but I still can't help but wondering what his plan is and when it's going to be my turn. and most of all did I do something to deserve this. all of it, all the time. It seems like life never lets up; a blistering magnifying glass of constant disappointment beating down my already pathetic little ant existence.
Still though, it feels nice to write again and get it off my chest.
and yeah this is gonna be short and sweet, not a whole book like ya'll are used to.
I'll try to get back soon. <3