Life has taken many unexpected turns:
Montreal- (my love)
I have left the only place that came close to feeling like "home". I will never again belong.
I will never forget the dirty streets, the floating snow, the hush of January and those lovely lampposts outside my poorly insulated windows. I will agonize over those far-away days for many years still.
***
Sweden- (oh, sweet isolation)
I have been living in Stockholm for some months now and have fallen in love with the early snow of its winters, the dark (and darkening) days and this feeling of being "really far", "on the other side of the world", "alone".
It surprises me how thankful I am for the darkness. The sun rises under my watchful eye at 8:30am. There will be light for the next 6 hours.
Now is the perfect time for a fresh start.
***
New life- (strange beauty)
I have been marveling in the joys and sorrows of motherhood. These feelings inside me: they make me ache and smile with a whole new state of bliss I never knew existed.
I protect and nourish him and patiently await his arrival early next year.
I hope he inherits much of his father: grounded, rational and forever at peace with life.
***