someone please.......help me....
i have been so depressed for a long time now. ive been crying hysterically every night, i dont eat anymore and i just feel sad constantly. i dont know what it is. i think some of it has to do with mike but im not sure. the biggest thing that bothers me the most is that mike always has to be with his friends. everytime he comes over, he stays for like an hour and then when he goes home he goes out with his friends for like, hours. this really bothers me because i NEVER ever see him at all, i maybe see him like twice a week thats it. i just feel like everyone is drifting from me and i feel so lonely. i took a depression test online and i scored ectremely high and it said that i should go to the doctor. mike doesnt understand how much i fucking love him. so much shit has happened between him and i and i dont know whats going on. life is soo fucking hard on me right now...it feels like someone from heaven is telling me that i should do something. i dont know what, its a weird feeling, but i surely dont feel like myself. and its a bad sign when im the worst ive been in my life...i swear to god, i have never felt like this in my life. ill get mad for no reason at all...and ill get mad at the STUPIDEST things. i think im gonna go talk to my doctor and tell her everything...i need something to keep me calm...if i do this any longer, i swear that ill die from like crying too much...if thats not possible, ill be the first person in the world to. i feel like everyone in the world hates me, im stressed with school, im stressed with trying to keep my relationship with mike intact and im trying to keep in touch with all my friends at the same time. im so overwhelmed with everything. no one has time for me anymore. it also doesnt help that i dont have a car. i wanna go places, and i cant. i wanna see mike like i used to, but i cant...theres just so much in my fucking head...