"Oh, *SNAP!*" (a.k.a. Not What He Wants To Hear When Proposing)
So we're at Niagara Falls, in our hotel room overlooking the water. It's late Friday night, and the fireworks have just finished. Now, I should mention that for the last three days, Ricky has been constantly asking me if I'm having a good time, and if this has been a good birthday and whatever. He did this approximately every 30 seconds or so. I nearly threw him over the goddamn Falls. Anyhoo, fireworks and then...
Me: Wow, that was awesome.
Ricky: I want to ask you something.
Me (turning to him and screaming): I'm having a good fucking time, okay? It's the best fucking birthday of my life! Will you stop fucking asking me already?!!?
Ricky: Um, no, I wanted to ask you something else.
Me: Oh shit, my bad. What?
Ricky: Will you marry me?
Me (waving him off): Yeah, whatever.
Ricky: No, I'm serious. Will you marry me?
Me: Yeah. Okay.
Something is shoved into my hand. It's dark in the room and hard to see.
Me: What the hell is this?
Ricky: It's a ring.
*pause*
Me: What the fuck is that for?
Ricky (exasperated): I'm asking you to marry me, dick!
Me: Oh *SNAP!* You were serious about that?
I squint at him in the darkness.
Me: Dude...are you...on your knee?
Ricky: Yeah.
Me: Wow. That's like, the gayest thing you've ever done.
Ricky: I expected nothing less from you.
*pause*
Me: Huh. Well, I gotta say, your timing is perfect.
Ricky: What? Why?
Me: Well, I didn't want to ruin the vacation, and I was gonna tell you when we got back.
Ricky (sounding nervous): Tell me what?
Me: Well...
*long pause*
Me: I'm pregnant.
All the color drained from Ricky's face.
Ricky: What?
Me: Yeah. I'm pregnant. I was gonna wait until we got home to tell you.
You could practically hear Ricky die inside. I gave it three seconds.
Me: Nah, I'm just fucking with ya. I'll marry you though.
*pause*
Ricky: There is something *really* fucking wrong with you.
Me: Yo, not my problem buddy. You're marrying it.
And that was pretty much it. Oh, and then we pranked my parents by telling them I said no. My mom cried and everything. It was HILARIOUS.
By the way, in this photo (which was on the same trip but obviously not the actual moment that we got engaged) one of the birds had just taken a huge dump on Ricky's arm. *Also* hilarious.
Me: Wow, that was awesome.
Ricky: I want to ask you something.
Me (turning to him and screaming): I'm having a good fucking time, okay? It's the best fucking birthday of my life! Will you stop fucking asking me already?!!?
Ricky: Um, no, I wanted to ask you something else.
Me: Oh shit, my bad. What?
Ricky: Will you marry me?
Me (waving him off): Yeah, whatever.
Ricky: No, I'm serious. Will you marry me?
Me: Yeah. Okay.
Something is shoved into my hand. It's dark in the room and hard to see.
Me: What the hell is this?
Ricky: It's a ring.
*pause*
Me: What the fuck is that for?
Ricky (exasperated): I'm asking you to marry me, dick!
Me: Oh *SNAP!* You were serious about that?
I squint at him in the darkness.
Me: Dude...are you...on your knee?
Ricky: Yeah.
Me: Wow. That's like, the gayest thing you've ever done.
Ricky: I expected nothing less from you.
*pause*
Me: Huh. Well, I gotta say, your timing is perfect.
Ricky: What? Why?
Me: Well, I didn't want to ruin the vacation, and I was gonna tell you when we got back.
Ricky (sounding nervous): Tell me what?
Me: Well...
*long pause*
Me: I'm pregnant.
All the color drained from Ricky's face.
Ricky: What?
Me: Yeah. I'm pregnant. I was gonna wait until we got home to tell you.
You could practically hear Ricky die inside. I gave it three seconds.
Me: Nah, I'm just fucking with ya. I'll marry you though.
*pause*
Ricky: There is something *really* fucking wrong with you.
Me: Yo, not my problem buddy. You're marrying it.
And that was pretty much it. Oh, and then we pranked my parents by telling them I said no. My mom cried and everything. It was HILARIOUS.
By the way, in this photo (which was on the same trip but obviously not the actual moment that we got engaged) one of the birds had just taken a huge dump on Ricky's arm. *Also* hilarious.