Fandom: A muddled mess
This amazingly bad crossover hails from The Pit. It is a Wicked/Harry Potter/Yu-Gi-Oh crossover called Something Wicked This Way Comes. Lots of descriptions of characters' eye-color, and age. No plot whatsoever. Truly a bad!fic.
SUMMARY: It was a normal day in Oz, until a boy with tricolored hair and another with a lightning bolt scar on his head turn up...
I should've stopped there.
© To the people who own Wicked, Harry Potter, and Yu-Gi-Oh!
Well, at least the disclaimer is short and to the point, which is more than I can say for the rest of this fic.
Something Wicked This Way Comes By: Amy Yu
And here all this time, I thought it was William Shakespeare.
It was a normal day in Oz, or as normal as a day in Oz gets...
How droll.
“Hey Elphie!” said a teenage girl with golden curls, blue eyes, and a pink dress said running up to another teenage girl in a black dress with dark brown eyes and…GREEN SKIN!
Come up for air! You know, you could break that up a bit.
‘Sweet Oz, not her!’ the green girl thought rolling her eyes.
You just gave us her name.
“Hey Glinda!” Elphaba said, faking cheerfulness.
Are there two green girls? Oh, I see. You put it into another sentence.
“What’s up Elphie?” Glinda said, in actual cheerfulness.
Somebody pass the insulin, please.
“Nothing much, surprisingly...”Elphaba said and the two girls lapsed into silence as
The readers lapsed into a coma
they stared at an unoccupied open field that would very soon be occupied...
Is that supposed to be foreshadowing? Or are they waiting for a sporting event?
Open Field
That was previously mentioned.
“Hey, where are we?” asked a slightly disorientated sixteen year old boy although he could pass as thirteen year old, with blonde bangs, and spiked black hair that turned magenta at the tip and…violet eyes. Not to mention decked in leathers, with silver studded belts, wristbands, and collar that wound smoothly around his neck, and if that were not enough, and upside-down gold pyramid hung around his neck by a chain, “this certainly isn’t Domino City, let alone Japan!”
Holy overdescription, Batman!
“Oh shit…,”said another sixteen year old boy with jet black hair and startling green eyed, “the portkey must have malfunctioned.”
Is it really important what color eyes these losers have?
“Oh bother,” said (yet another sixteen year old) a bushy haired, brown eyed girl, “I’ve never heard of that before.
Any of these kids got names? Because, that might be more important information to share with the readers.
“How could it!” exclaimed (you guessed it, sixteen) a red haired, blue eyed boy.
*dies*
“Well,” said an eighteen year old (FINALLY!) brown haired, blue eyed teen, “what do you propose we do?”
Are their names a state secret? And that "finally" is in the actual text.
The green eyed boy glared coldly at the eighteen year old.
Wait…I lost my score card. Which green-eyed kid is this?
“Do you EVER lighten up?” he asked.
Who asked? Is there going to be test after this?
The blue eyed teen snorted.
Some crack, because it was the only thing that would make this fic understandable.
“I’m afraid not,” the tri-colored hair boy sighed sadly.
This would probably have more impact if we knew who these losers were.
The eighteen year old glared at the leather adorned teen.
For no apparent reason, because we don’t know who everybody is.
“Hey!” a voice behind them all yelled angrily.
Hey, yourself, anonomous person.
They all turned around, a green girl wearing a black dress was running toward them, followed by a blonde in a pink dress.
That would be the girls we just met, right?
“Who are you and what are you doing here?” the said a green girl about the age of nineteen
That’s what I was just asking!
(How old is Elphaba?).
Who gives a rat’s ass? What color eyes does she have again?
“Who are you?” said confident and slightly arrogant voice
*groan*
that belong to the boy with the upside-down gold pyramid hanging from his neck,
Enough already. It there a plot point anywhere in our future?
and as Elphaba looked at him, she couldn’t help but notice his crimson eyes; they seem to burn into her soul. His gaze was steady as he looked at her.
Whatever.
“I asked you first,” Elphaba said, as she said this she felt childish.
So far everything in this fic is childish. And that should be two separate sentences.
“Very well, my name is Yugi Motou, and this is Seto Kaiba,” the tri-colored hair boy said gesturing to the brown haired teen.
Finally! Names!
“And I’m Hermione,” said the bushy brown haired girl.
I’m probably a slut in this fic. I thought I’d mention that upfront.
“I’m Harry,” said the green eyed boy.
So, this was supposed to be a surprise, then?
“And I’m Ron,” said the red head.
You don’t get to know my eye color. So, nah!
“Nice to meet cha!” Glinda said cutting in, “my name’s Glinda!”
Please.
Elphaba rolled her eyes.
I’m with you there.
“Well,” the green-eyed boy, Harry, said to Elphaba, “that leaves you.”
Again with the eye color. You know, clothing and hair is more readily identifiable.
“My name’s Elphaba,” the green skinned girl replied, “so, mind explaining why you’re here?”
Who are you? The sudden appearance Police?
“Well, um…” said the tri-colored hair kid
You gave us they’re names! Use them.
whose voice seemed to soften and, unless Elphaba was mistaken, had eyes that were crimson, but were now... violet?
I. Don’t. Care!
Was it a trick of the light?
No, it’s just bad!fic, Ephie.
But how could it be?
You live in Oz, for pity’s sake. All kinds of bizarre shit happens there.
Of course, it wasn’t a trick of the light because, although nobody in the open field knew, the upside-down gold pyramid hanging from Yugi’s neck contained a 5000 year old sprit of an Egyptian pharaoh.
So, he wears the spirit of Methos, does he?
“You see, we, that is to say Kaiba and I, were flying to America.”
*sings* They're comin' to America!
“Where’s America?” ask Glinda.
Second star on the right, and straight on til morning. Whoops, that’s another fairy tale.
“Why, you don’t know where America is?” asked Hermione astonished.
If she knew, she wouldn’t ask! How dumb are you?
“No,” said Elphaba.
“Oh, dear,” Hermione said, “um, may I ask where we are?”
Finally, somebody thinks to ask.
“Why, you’re in Oz silly!” said Glinda.
Oz-silly. Is that in Ireland?
“OZ!” Ron exclaimed.
No, Oz-silly! Weren’t you paying attention?
“Yes, Oz,” Elphaba said, getting annoyed at these new comers stupidity.
You’re not the only one.
“Oh, well, whatever, point is,” continued Yugi, “we were flying to America and well, our plane, that is Kaiba’s private jet, crashed into a lake and well...we got out okay, (Damn) and three people sitting beside the lake shore and decided to ask for their help.
Is this the first plot point?
“It was not my fault that my plane crashed, it’s not like I’m the one who checks to make sure everything is working fine,” Kaiba cut in coldly.
Great. Now they’re going to argue and slow this down further.
“So, are you blaming your brother?” Yugi asked
Of course he is! That’s what brothers do.
Kaiba said nothing, he only glared at Yugi.
He said nothing! I think I love him.
“That doesn’t explain how you got here,” Elphaba said.
Oh, you noticed that.
“Yes, we’re getting there,” Hermione said briskly.
Yeah, briskly. At a brisk snail’s pace.
“Yea, so we went to ask for help and as you may have guessed that those three people are them,”
Ow. Ow. Ow.
Yugi said pointing at Harry, Ron, and Hermione.
Thank you for pointing out the obvious.
“Of course we utterly bewildered at the site of them,” Hermione said.
Just the site of them? Not the plane crashing in the lake
“Yeah, especially when we saw Yugi with his hair,” Ron added.
Like having wizards with weird hair is unusual for you lot.
“Ron!” Hermione exclaimed.
What?
“Well, it’s true…”Ron said
Well, that makes it okay, then.
“Anyways,” Harry said in a bored voice,
Go, Harry! He’s reading ahead.
having lived with Hermione and Ron fighting for a very long time,
Can we have the edited highlights?
“so Yugi came up to us and explained the whole thing to us, about going to America, crashing, and all that stuff.
Wait…I’m having a problem with my geography. Wouldn’t they be flying over the Pacific Ocean? Man, they were lost.
Then he asked us if we could help them get back to Japan, which is where there from, if you didn‘t guess.”
Did they give up on America?
“Which reminds me,” Ron interjected, “how the bloody hell do you two know how to speak English?”
Wait, which two. The girls from Oz or the guys from Japan?
“It’s a simple thing called school,” Kaiba sneered.
Score one for Kaibe, because, apparently Ron is as dumb as a box of rocks in this fic.
“You remind me of Draco Malfoy,” Harry scowled.
Thank you for the totally random book reference, Harry.
“Whatever,” Kaiba spat, “point is your ‘portkey’-”
“What’s a portkey?” Glinda interrupted as Kaiba glared at her.
Don’t interrupt, this is slow enough as it is!
“Let me put it in the simplest way,”
So stupid here can understand
Harry said, “it’s an object that can get you from one place to another.”
I figured that out all by myself.
“Oh, like a bubble?” Glinda asked.
“No, I don’t think so,” Harry said.
You don’t even know what she’s talking about. Admit it!
“Who on earth travels by bubble,” Hermione said.
You’re not on Earth! You're in bad!fic Land!
“I do,” said Glinda, not the least bit insulted.
“Oh my, isn’t that difficult?” inquired Hermione.
No more difficult than riding a broom, sweetie.
“No not really, I could show you sometime-”
*screams*
“Meanwhile,” Elphaba said irritatingly.
Don’t you mean in irritation? I mean, I’m pretty irritated now.
“Oh yes, well you see we thought it would be frightfully irresponsible to let these two, who know nothing of portkeys to use it by themselves,
After all, these morons ended up in England when they were flying to America!
just in case something like this happened, so we went along with them,” Hermione said.
And totally screwed it up anyway.
“Well, now you can leave,” Elphaba said.
I think I love you.
“I’m afraid we can’t do that,” the tri-colored hair boy said, and as Elphaba stared she notice his eyes were back to crimson, perhaps it was a trick of the light...
*screams and sporks green-eyes out*
“Why not?” asked Elphaba.
Because we don’t know what the hell we’re doing.
“Because I don’t think that we’re in the correct world anymore,” Yami said.
Gee, what was your first clue? The chick with green skin? Or the one who travels in a bubble?
Everyone stared at Yami, all except Seto who rolled his eyes.
*groan* End, will you!
He had lived with ‘Yugi’ and his mystical crap for quite some time
Crap. Good word to use in this fic.
and was used to him saying odd things like this, yet still didn’t believe it; in fact he didn’t even believe in the stuff that was happening right at this moment.
I’m sure that makes sense in some universe.
Yami sighed.
And then screamed in panic.
“What I mean is that I think that this is a different realm from the one that we are from.”
No shit, Sherlock!
At that everyone looked even more puzzled. Yami blushed slightly and said in a slightly irritable voice.
Stop interrupting so we can get to the plot!
“Never mind.”
D’oh!
“Okay...”Harry said, “so anyways, I think Yugi is right about the whole we-can’t-get-back thing.”
Harry, when did you stop being an Englishman?
“Why not?” Elphaba asked again.
Whatever.
“We have no idea where we are and if Yugi is right and we’re in a different world, I’m guessing it’ll be almost impossible for the portkey to go from one world to another,” said Harry.
I think we established this several paragraphs back.
“Since when did you get so smart?” Ron asked astonished.
Please! He’s Harry Potter, remember? The Hero of the series.
“Well, why couldn’t you get back to your world, you got here didn’t you?” Elphaba interjected before Harry could respond to Ron.
Because then we wouldn’t have a story. *cheers*
“Because we didn’t intend to come here,” Hermione answered.
Alright, I’ll say it. *gasp* Happy now? Like nobody figured that out when you said you were going to Japan.
SUMMARY: It was a normal day in Oz, until a boy with tricolored hair and another with a lightning bolt scar on his head turn up...
I should've stopped there.
© To the people who own Wicked, Harry Potter, and Yu-Gi-Oh!
Well, at least the disclaimer is short and to the point, which is more than I can say for the rest of this fic.
Something Wicked This Way Comes By: Amy Yu
And here all this time, I thought it was William Shakespeare.
It was a normal day in Oz, or as normal as a day in Oz gets...
How droll.
“Hey Elphie!” said a teenage girl with golden curls, blue eyes, and a pink dress said running up to another teenage girl in a black dress with dark brown eyes and…GREEN SKIN!
Come up for air! You know, you could break that up a bit.
‘Sweet Oz, not her!’ the green girl thought rolling her eyes.
You just gave us her name.
“Hey Glinda!” Elphaba said, faking cheerfulness.
Are there two green girls? Oh, I see. You put it into another sentence.
“What’s up Elphie?” Glinda said, in actual cheerfulness.
Somebody pass the insulin, please.
“Nothing much, surprisingly...”Elphaba said and the two girls lapsed into silence as
The readers lapsed into a coma
they stared at an unoccupied open field that would very soon be occupied...
Is that supposed to be foreshadowing? Or are they waiting for a sporting event?
Open Field
That was previously mentioned.
“Hey, where are we?” asked a slightly disorientated sixteen year old boy although he could pass as thirteen year old, with blonde bangs, and spiked black hair that turned magenta at the tip and…violet eyes. Not to mention decked in leathers, with silver studded belts, wristbands, and collar that wound smoothly around his neck, and if that were not enough, and upside-down gold pyramid hung around his neck by a chain, “this certainly isn’t Domino City, let alone Japan!”
Holy overdescription, Batman!
“Oh shit…,”said another sixteen year old boy with jet black hair and startling green eyed, “the portkey must have malfunctioned.”
Is it really important what color eyes these losers have?
“Oh bother,” said (yet another sixteen year old) a bushy haired, brown eyed girl, “I’ve never heard of that before.
Any of these kids got names? Because, that might be more important information to share with the readers.
“How could it!” exclaimed (you guessed it, sixteen) a red haired, blue eyed boy.
*dies*
“Well,” said an eighteen year old (FINALLY!) brown haired, blue eyed teen, “what do you propose we do?”
Are their names a state secret? And that "finally" is in the actual text.
The green eyed boy glared coldly at the eighteen year old.
Wait…I lost my score card. Which green-eyed kid is this?
“Do you EVER lighten up?” he asked.
Who asked? Is there going to be test after this?
The blue eyed teen snorted.
Some crack, because it was the only thing that would make this fic understandable.
“I’m afraid not,” the tri-colored hair boy sighed sadly.
This would probably have more impact if we knew who these losers were.
The eighteen year old glared at the leather adorned teen.
For no apparent reason, because we don’t know who everybody is.
“Hey!” a voice behind them all yelled angrily.
Hey, yourself, anonomous person.
They all turned around, a green girl wearing a black dress was running toward them, followed by a blonde in a pink dress.
That would be the girls we just met, right?
“Who are you and what are you doing here?” the said a green girl about the age of nineteen
That’s what I was just asking!
(How old is Elphaba?).
Who gives a rat’s ass? What color eyes does she have again?
“Who are you?” said confident and slightly arrogant voice
*groan*
that belong to the boy with the upside-down gold pyramid hanging from his neck,
Enough already. It there a plot point anywhere in our future?
and as Elphaba looked at him, she couldn’t help but notice his crimson eyes; they seem to burn into her soul. His gaze was steady as he looked at her.
Whatever.
“I asked you first,” Elphaba said, as she said this she felt childish.
So far everything in this fic is childish. And that should be two separate sentences.
“Very well, my name is Yugi Motou, and this is Seto Kaiba,” the tri-colored hair boy said gesturing to the brown haired teen.
Finally! Names!
“And I’m Hermione,” said the bushy brown haired girl.
I’m probably a slut in this fic. I thought I’d mention that upfront.
“I’m Harry,” said the green eyed boy.
So, this was supposed to be a surprise, then?
“And I’m Ron,” said the red head.
You don’t get to know my eye color. So, nah!
“Nice to meet cha!” Glinda said cutting in, “my name’s Glinda!”
Please.
Elphaba rolled her eyes.
I’m with you there.
“Well,” the green-eyed boy, Harry, said to Elphaba, “that leaves you.”
Again with the eye color. You know, clothing and hair is more readily identifiable.
“My name’s Elphaba,” the green skinned girl replied, “so, mind explaining why you’re here?”
Who are you? The sudden appearance Police?
“Well, um…” said the tri-colored hair kid
You gave us they’re names! Use them.
whose voice seemed to soften and, unless Elphaba was mistaken, had eyes that were crimson, but were now... violet?
I. Don’t. Care!
Was it a trick of the light?
No, it’s just bad!fic, Ephie.
But how could it be?
You live in Oz, for pity’s sake. All kinds of bizarre shit happens there.
Of course, it wasn’t a trick of the light because, although nobody in the open field knew, the upside-down gold pyramid hanging from Yugi’s neck contained a 5000 year old sprit of an Egyptian pharaoh.
So, he wears the spirit of Methos, does he?
“You see, we, that is to say Kaiba and I, were flying to America.”
*sings* They're comin' to America!
“Where’s America?” ask Glinda.
Second star on the right, and straight on til morning. Whoops, that’s another fairy tale.
“Why, you don’t know where America is?” asked Hermione astonished.
If she knew, she wouldn’t ask! How dumb are you?
“No,” said Elphaba.
“Oh, dear,” Hermione said, “um, may I ask where we are?”
Finally, somebody thinks to ask.
“Why, you’re in Oz silly!” said Glinda.
Oz-silly. Is that in Ireland?
“OZ!” Ron exclaimed.
No, Oz-silly! Weren’t you paying attention?
“Yes, Oz,” Elphaba said, getting annoyed at these new comers stupidity.
You’re not the only one.
“Oh, well, whatever, point is,” continued Yugi, “we were flying to America and well, our plane, that is Kaiba’s private jet, crashed into a lake and well...we got out okay, (Damn) and three people sitting beside the lake shore and decided to ask for their help.
Is this the first plot point?
“It was not my fault that my plane crashed, it’s not like I’m the one who checks to make sure everything is working fine,” Kaiba cut in coldly.
Great. Now they’re going to argue and slow this down further.
“So, are you blaming your brother?” Yugi asked
Of course he is! That’s what brothers do.
Kaiba said nothing, he only glared at Yugi.
He said nothing! I think I love him.
“That doesn’t explain how you got here,” Elphaba said.
Oh, you noticed that.
“Yes, we’re getting there,” Hermione said briskly.
Yeah, briskly. At a brisk snail’s pace.
“Yea, so we went to ask for help and as you may have guessed that those three people are them,”
Ow. Ow. Ow.
Yugi said pointing at Harry, Ron, and Hermione.
Thank you for pointing out the obvious.
“Of course we utterly bewildered at the site of them,” Hermione said.
Just the site of them? Not the plane crashing in the lake
“Yeah, especially when we saw Yugi with his hair,” Ron added.
Like having wizards with weird hair is unusual for you lot.
“Ron!” Hermione exclaimed.
What?
“Well, it’s true…”Ron said
Well, that makes it okay, then.
“Anyways,” Harry said in a bored voice,
Go, Harry! He’s reading ahead.
having lived with Hermione and Ron fighting for a very long time,
Can we have the edited highlights?
“so Yugi came up to us and explained the whole thing to us, about going to America, crashing, and all that stuff.
Wait…I’m having a problem with my geography. Wouldn’t they be flying over the Pacific Ocean? Man, they were lost.
Then he asked us if we could help them get back to Japan, which is where there from, if you didn‘t guess.”
Did they give up on America?
“Which reminds me,” Ron interjected, “how the bloody hell do you two know how to speak English?”
Wait, which two. The girls from Oz or the guys from Japan?
“It’s a simple thing called school,” Kaiba sneered.
Score one for Kaibe, because, apparently Ron is as dumb as a box of rocks in this fic.
“You remind me of Draco Malfoy,” Harry scowled.
Thank you for the totally random book reference, Harry.
“Whatever,” Kaiba spat, “point is your ‘portkey’-”
“What’s a portkey?” Glinda interrupted as Kaiba glared at her.
Don’t interrupt, this is slow enough as it is!
“Let me put it in the simplest way,”
So stupid here can understand
Harry said, “it’s an object that can get you from one place to another.”
I figured that out all by myself.
“Oh, like a bubble?” Glinda asked.
“No, I don’t think so,” Harry said.
You don’t even know what she’s talking about. Admit it!
“Who on earth travels by bubble,” Hermione said.
You’re not on Earth! You're in bad!fic Land!
“I do,” said Glinda, not the least bit insulted.
“Oh my, isn’t that difficult?” inquired Hermione.
No more difficult than riding a broom, sweetie.
“No not really, I could show you sometime-”
*screams*
“Meanwhile,” Elphaba said irritatingly.
Don’t you mean in irritation? I mean, I’m pretty irritated now.
“Oh yes, well you see we thought it would be frightfully irresponsible to let these two, who know nothing of portkeys to use it by themselves,
After all, these morons ended up in England when they were flying to America!
just in case something like this happened, so we went along with them,” Hermione said.
And totally screwed it up anyway.
“Well, now you can leave,” Elphaba said.
I think I love you.
“I’m afraid we can’t do that,” the tri-colored hair boy said, and as Elphaba stared she notice his eyes were back to crimson, perhaps it was a trick of the light...
*screams and sporks green-eyes out*
“Why not?” asked Elphaba.
Because we don’t know what the hell we’re doing.
“Because I don’t think that we’re in the correct world anymore,” Yami said.
Gee, what was your first clue? The chick with green skin? Or the one who travels in a bubble?
Everyone stared at Yami, all except Seto who rolled his eyes.
*groan* End, will you!
He had lived with ‘Yugi’ and his mystical crap for quite some time
Crap. Good word to use in this fic.
and was used to him saying odd things like this, yet still didn’t believe it; in fact he didn’t even believe in the stuff that was happening right at this moment.
I’m sure that makes sense in some universe.
Yami sighed.
And then screamed in panic.
“What I mean is that I think that this is a different realm from the one that we are from.”
No shit, Sherlock!
At that everyone looked even more puzzled. Yami blushed slightly and said in a slightly irritable voice.
Stop interrupting so we can get to the plot!
“Never mind.”
D’oh!
“Okay...”Harry said, “so anyways, I think Yugi is right about the whole we-can’t-get-back thing.”
Harry, when did you stop being an Englishman?
“Why not?” Elphaba asked again.
Whatever.
“We have no idea where we are and if Yugi is right and we’re in a different world, I’m guessing it’ll be almost impossible for the portkey to go from one world to another,” said Harry.
I think we established this several paragraphs back.
“Since when did you get so smart?” Ron asked astonished.
Please! He’s Harry Potter, remember? The Hero of the series.
“Well, why couldn’t you get back to your world, you got here didn’t you?” Elphaba interjected before Harry could respond to Ron.
Because then we wouldn’t have a story. *cheers*
“Because we didn’t intend to come here,” Hermione answered.
Alright, I’ll say it. *gasp* Happy now? Like nobody figured that out when you said you were going to Japan.