(no subject)
So i haven't done much lately but sit in my house and do nothing i don't get out much anymore kinda of depressing when i think about it. before i when i wasn't pregant i use to be out all the time doing something with more then one friend now i tresure the days i get to go out my door to get the mail around 3:00 in the afternoon not that the mail is any better they just tell me what bills i have to pay with the money that i don't have cause i can't get a job cause i am pregant. i love going to the doctord these days too cause its a day that i get to spend not in the house i almost feel i should make up a illness so i can go and get out of the house. sometimes even beth will come get me but thats not offten cause she has her life . but i wish i had a car so i could get the fuck out of this house sometime some day i don't even look out my windows some day go by so fast i don't even no what day of the weeek or even the date inless theres a doctors appointment on that day some days i don't even feel the wind on my face not that right now is the best time for that but if your not outside a least once a day you start to miss even the coldest days
and the father of my baby doesn't even call or come around ever sense we broke up . he's got a new girlfriend or shall i say his x girlfriend whatever i am going to make his life hell he doesn't even care whats going on with his own kid. i don't like to be mean people know me to be nice and i thought i would be nice to him and not make him pay child support and all i ask for is some money every week and all he has to do is call and check in sometimes or bring me to the doctors stuff thats easy and no i get nothing so i have nothing better to do then to make is life even more of a living hell he thinks he's got in so bad right knopw i am am am am am am am going to make it a lot worse of his lying ass he better live up these next couple of months cause in 4 months hell begins for Micheal Richard Barbour it will be hell for that lil boy i will be crushing him
so you see my life has not been going very good. its been so very hard but i guess its they way my life is going to be for a little bit till i can find a way to make it better i feel a little bit better saying it in thisn little letter cause its off my shoulds a little more
but i am still depressed
and the father of my baby doesn't even call or come around ever sense we broke up . he's got a new girlfriend or shall i say his x girlfriend whatever i am going to make his life hell he doesn't even care whats going on with his own kid. i don't like to be mean people know me to be nice and i thought i would be nice to him and not make him pay child support and all i ask for is some money every week and all he has to do is call and check in sometimes or bring me to the doctors stuff thats easy and no i get nothing so i have nothing better to do then to make is life even more of a living hell he thinks he's got in so bad right knopw i am am am am am am am going to make it a lot worse of his lying ass he better live up these next couple of months cause in 4 months hell begins for Micheal Richard Barbour it will be hell for that lil boy i will be crushing him
so you see my life has not been going very good. its been so very hard but i guess its they way my life is going to be for a little bit till i can find a way to make it better i feel a little bit better saying it in thisn little letter cause its off my shoulds a little more
but i am still depressed