of dates and happiness.
Welcome again readers and gather round. It seems that I once more have found something to ruminate upon. Socially this has been a very busy past month for me. I do believe I have had more dates in the last 5 weeks than I have had in the previous 20 years. I am at a loss to explain the recent explosion in this regard (perhaps I have taken to bathing more frequently?) and do not wish to curse this turn of events by over intellectualizing it. However, I have found it to be incredibly taxing and not so fun as it at first had seemed……let me explain.
I feel like I’m interviewing people for a job. This is a terrible thing! I’ve always been of the opinion that dates should be capital F capital U capital N, FUN! I don’t believe in traditional dates and I don’t believe in dating for ulterior reasons (You know the ones guys…..”Hey, she’s hot! I want to be seen with this hotness…” or “Hmmm…maybe I can make X jealous if she sees me with Y”, or the ever popular “Whooooaaaaaaaaa…..THAT I want to have sex with). I hate the games people play when dating and I hate the baggage that’s involved with traditional dating. Ok, there’s the list of what I hate and the simple need that I have for a date being FUN.
Only…it hasn’t really been.
Recent interests have certainly been the combination of personality and physicality that I enjoy…but something has been missing with each. (D, I miss you and I think you have spoiled me!) What it comes right down to I guess is that I don’t want a “date” really or even a significant other. I want someone that I can have fun with and enjoys having fun with me; someone who is an equal and a partner and not just a lover or a girlfriend; someone that hasn’t ever really grown up and still remembers how to laugh and feel joy, who can still see things from a childish view every once in a while.
Hmmmm ok, that all seems a bit unfair I suppose. One shouldn’t complain that a stroke of good fortune isn’t good enough. What it all means is that I want what everyone wants: to be understood and loved for it anyways.
I feel like I’m interviewing people for a job. This is a terrible thing! I’ve always been of the opinion that dates should be capital F capital U capital N, FUN! I don’t believe in traditional dates and I don’t believe in dating for ulterior reasons (You know the ones guys…..”Hey, she’s hot! I want to be seen with this hotness…” or “Hmmm…maybe I can make X jealous if she sees me with Y”, or the ever popular “Whooooaaaaaaaaa…..THAT I want to have sex with). I hate the games people play when dating and I hate the baggage that’s involved with traditional dating. Ok, there’s the list of what I hate and the simple need that I have for a date being FUN.
Only…it hasn’t really been.
Recent interests have certainly been the combination of personality and physicality that I enjoy…but something has been missing with each. (D, I miss you and I think you have spoiled me!) What it comes right down to I guess is that I don’t want a “date” really or even a significant other. I want someone that I can have fun with and enjoys having fun with me; someone who is an equal and a partner and not just a lover or a girlfriend; someone that hasn’t ever really grown up and still remembers how to laugh and feel joy, who can still see things from a childish view every once in a while.
Hmmmm ok, that all seems a bit unfair I suppose. One shouldn’t complain that a stroke of good fortune isn’t good enough. What it all means is that I want what everyone wants: to be understood and loved for it anyways.