Bah Lovebug - A Valentine's story event!
An entry for the forum contest here.
The King of Midnight
"Impossible!"
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah!"
"I bet my familiar."
"I bet my island!"
"You don't have an island."
"The hell I don't!"
"Deal."
--
The King of Midnight was very dignified. He enjoyed his time on the land, never stooping low to the cutthroat game of poker or the unruly nature of a rumble fight. It was never swordfighting but fencing, and he refused to enter a match with anything but his personal foil.
He was also very manly: scones and tea in the morning, blood and plunder by night. Yes, the King of Midnight was the quintessence of the perfect man.
But above all else, the King of Midnight was ready to hurl.
"Pink!" he cried. "Bloody murder, the place is pink!" And with haste he caught the next ferry to escape the gushy, fluffy terror of the Winter Solstice docks.
A bloodcurdling scream pierced the air as our manly King of Midnight stepped onto land once more. Alpha Island. His home island. Marred with the disgusting color of candy hearts and baby piggies. The sight was unbearable. He ran as fast and as majestically as he could manage, all too eager to purge such a gruesome image from his mind. "Hearts....so many hearts," he gasped as he stumbled through his front door.
A wave of relief swept over him. The sunshine flowed lazily in the room through windows overhead illuminating the clean white walls and sophisticated polished wood trim. It was heaven; he was finally safe. There was no way the lace and the sick smell of chocolate could reach him in his luxurious abode. No more hearts, no more roses, no more sappy couples eating each others' faces.
The King of Midnight trudged up the steps wanting nothing more than to lie down on his nice firm bed and leave this nightmare behind. His bedroom door timidly creaked as he let himself into his quiet sanctuary. He glanced up and nearly fainted.
"Snookums!"
The lovely voice of his wife felt distant as his sanity fell to pieces. "Honey," he croaked, "what is this mess doing in our house?" Rose petals like velvet drops of blood blanketed the floor and the bedspread. Pink candles gave the room a warm and fuzzy air, and his wife, enveloped in a flowing satin dress, was sprawled amongst the pillows. His wife. His innocent little wife. Corrupted.
This was the plague.
"It's Valentine's Day, My Love," she said as she seductively licked her lips, "and I would love it if you brought me a box of chocolate."
Those heathen words.
"Go buy yourself a box of chocolate, woman!" he snapped and dashed out of the room.
The world was nuts. His precious islands were covered in monstrous decorations promoting a frenzied hurricane of hormones. And oh the hormones. They were contagious! He nearly retched as he passed couple after couple with their lips locked together in that disgusting tradition of exchanging saliva. He was the king of this island, this ocean. He had to fix this sickness before it consumed them all. He had to save mankind.
The palace loomed in front of him. The death of Valentine's Day was near as he mounted the concrete steps and it couldn't come a moment too soon. He scowled as people rushed out the front doors of the palace with lovesick smiles, happily greeting him as they passed. They all carried flowers, teddy bears and cards. All contraband as soon as he was through.
His eyes fell upon the woman sitting in the throne. She had a mischievous smile as she coyly played with a soft, brown curl while watching him cross the marble floor expanse. Although surprised that it wasn't Demeter, Vilya's acting governor, sitting in the throne, the King of Midnight concluded that this was better considering the circumstances. This was just the woman he needed to see.
"Aphrodite, this Valentine business has gotten way out of hand," he stated with authority. "We need to put this to an end."
"Happy SAD," Aphrodite solemnly replied.
"Beg pardon?"
The Goddess of Love sighed as she picked at a loose thread on her dress. "Happy Singles Awareness Day, Captain Cleaver," she said without changing her tone.
King Cleaver sputtered. "But there aren't any singles about," he exclaimed. "All I see are couples. They're everywhere. It's an infestation!"
Aphrodite chuckled. "This isn't my doing, Captain," she serenely told him. "Valentine's Day is a celebration of the beauty of love. Love is the driving force behind happiness for most people. It leads to acceptance, friendship, and romance, and everyone wants at least one or all of those things deep down. To be loved by one's family, friends, and significant other gives a person the strength to continue on through the trials and realities of life. While love should be celebrated everyday, we as a society picked today as a day to dedicate to the celebration. And," she said sharply, cutting Cleaver off, "I say 'Happy Singles Awareness Day' to you because you'll soon become aware that you're single."
"I'm not single," Cleaver protested. "I have a wife waiting for me at home. She means everything to me. We're happy."
A laugh so cruel, so cutting came from Aphrodite at that moment that Cleaver briefly wondered if she had been spending too much time with Nemesis lately. He winced as she stood up, grabbed his collar and yanked him in close.
"Is it normal for her to make an effort to impress you on Valentine's Day?" she breathed into his ear. "When was the last time you saw her in a dress? When was the last time she cleaned herself up for you? When was the last time your dear wife asked you for something?"
A chill ran down the man's back as he stood, paralyzed.
She smirked as she stared straight into his eyes, an icy expression no one would expect from someone as warm as Aphrodite. It was as if Hades himself had materialized in her place. "I am the Goddess of Love," she loftily declared. "Your wife came to me out of desperation. Your love is dying."
The blood was drained from Cleaver's face as Aphrodite stepped back appearing thoroughly satisfied. She held out a hand and with an explosion of blue smoke, a small, delicately wrapped box of chocolates appeared in her palm. "I think you were looking for this."
She held up a finger as Cleaver reached for it, pausing his movement. "First," she said, "you must say, 'I am a pink and passionate lovebug.'"
A glimmer of disgust passed over Cleaver's features. "But that's completely absurd."
A beatific smile spread on Aphrodite's face as she wrapped an arm around his shoulder in a friendly gesture. "Cleaver, Cleaver, dear Captain Cleaver," she said pleasantly. "I must know that you will embrace the celebration of love from now on. You need to feel it. You need to be the celebration of love. For your wife."
It was as if a lightbulb had suddenly switched on. Cleaver's face glowed with marvelous joy brighter than Apollo in December. "I am a pink and passionate lovebug," he whispered. "I am a pink and passionate lovebug." He repeated the phrase over and over again as he clutched the box of chocolate to his chest, each time louder and with more fervor. "I AM A PINK AND PASSIONATE LOVEBUG!"
All activity in the palace abruptly stopped as the King of Midnight ran out of the throne room in a fit of frenzied euphoria. His continuous yell of ecstasy echoed through the main corridor, slowly fading away.
There was a soft pop as Hephaestus appeared beside the throne in a cloud of blue smoke, jaw dropped in awe. "I can't believe he said that," he said slowly. "He's gone mad. Dear Nemo, the Captain's gone mad."
"You know it," Aphrodite smugly replied. "Where's my island?"
--
The citizens of Midnight were overjoyed to hear that their surly king had finally expressed his approval of Valentine's Day. However, those that happened upon the Jet Archipelago were very confused when they strolled by the sign reading, "Welcome to Aphrodite's Forge".
approximately 1400 words
edit: from the event thread:
And our winner taking home her very own red octo :
Bisquick of Midnight - The King of Midnight
The King of Midnight
"Impossible!"
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah!"
"I bet my familiar."
"I bet my island!"
"You don't have an island."
"The hell I don't!"
"Deal."
--
The King of Midnight was very dignified. He enjoyed his time on the land, never stooping low to the cutthroat game of poker or the unruly nature of a rumble fight. It was never swordfighting but fencing, and he refused to enter a match with anything but his personal foil.
He was also very manly: scones and tea in the morning, blood and plunder by night. Yes, the King of Midnight was the quintessence of the perfect man.
But above all else, the King of Midnight was ready to hurl.
"Pink!" he cried. "Bloody murder, the place is pink!" And with haste he caught the next ferry to escape the gushy, fluffy terror of the Winter Solstice docks.
A bloodcurdling scream pierced the air as our manly King of Midnight stepped onto land once more. Alpha Island. His home island. Marred with the disgusting color of candy hearts and baby piggies. The sight was unbearable. He ran as fast and as majestically as he could manage, all too eager to purge such a gruesome image from his mind. "Hearts....so many hearts," he gasped as he stumbled through his front door.
A wave of relief swept over him. The sunshine flowed lazily in the room through windows overhead illuminating the clean white walls and sophisticated polished wood trim. It was heaven; he was finally safe. There was no way the lace and the sick smell of chocolate could reach him in his luxurious abode. No more hearts, no more roses, no more sappy couples eating each others' faces.
The King of Midnight trudged up the steps wanting nothing more than to lie down on his nice firm bed and leave this nightmare behind. His bedroom door timidly creaked as he let himself into his quiet sanctuary. He glanced up and nearly fainted.
"Snookums!"
The lovely voice of his wife felt distant as his sanity fell to pieces. "Honey," he croaked, "what is this mess doing in our house?" Rose petals like velvet drops of blood blanketed the floor and the bedspread. Pink candles gave the room a warm and fuzzy air, and his wife, enveloped in a flowing satin dress, was sprawled amongst the pillows. His wife. His innocent little wife. Corrupted.
This was the plague.
"It's Valentine's Day, My Love," she said as she seductively licked her lips, "and I would love it if you brought me a box of chocolate."
Those heathen words.
"Go buy yourself a box of chocolate, woman!" he snapped and dashed out of the room.
The world was nuts. His precious islands were covered in monstrous decorations promoting a frenzied hurricane of hormones. And oh the hormones. They were contagious! He nearly retched as he passed couple after couple with their lips locked together in that disgusting tradition of exchanging saliva. He was the king of this island, this ocean. He had to fix this sickness before it consumed them all. He had to save mankind.
The palace loomed in front of him. The death of Valentine's Day was near as he mounted the concrete steps and it couldn't come a moment too soon. He scowled as people rushed out the front doors of the palace with lovesick smiles, happily greeting him as they passed. They all carried flowers, teddy bears and cards. All contraband as soon as he was through.
His eyes fell upon the woman sitting in the throne. She had a mischievous smile as she coyly played with a soft, brown curl while watching him cross the marble floor expanse. Although surprised that it wasn't Demeter, Vilya's acting governor, sitting in the throne, the King of Midnight concluded that this was better considering the circumstances. This was just the woman he needed to see.
"Aphrodite, this Valentine business has gotten way out of hand," he stated with authority. "We need to put this to an end."
"Happy SAD," Aphrodite solemnly replied.
"Beg pardon?"
The Goddess of Love sighed as she picked at a loose thread on her dress. "Happy Singles Awareness Day, Captain Cleaver," she said without changing her tone.
King Cleaver sputtered. "But there aren't any singles about," he exclaimed. "All I see are couples. They're everywhere. It's an infestation!"
Aphrodite chuckled. "This isn't my doing, Captain," she serenely told him. "Valentine's Day is a celebration of the beauty of love. Love is the driving force behind happiness for most people. It leads to acceptance, friendship, and romance, and everyone wants at least one or all of those things deep down. To be loved by one's family, friends, and significant other gives a person the strength to continue on through the trials and realities of life. While love should be celebrated everyday, we as a society picked today as a day to dedicate to the celebration. And," she said sharply, cutting Cleaver off, "I say 'Happy Singles Awareness Day' to you because you'll soon become aware that you're single."
"I'm not single," Cleaver protested. "I have a wife waiting for me at home. She means everything to me. We're happy."
A laugh so cruel, so cutting came from Aphrodite at that moment that Cleaver briefly wondered if she had been spending too much time with Nemesis lately. He winced as she stood up, grabbed his collar and yanked him in close.
"Is it normal for her to make an effort to impress you on Valentine's Day?" she breathed into his ear. "When was the last time you saw her in a dress? When was the last time she cleaned herself up for you? When was the last time your dear wife asked you for something?"
A chill ran down the man's back as he stood, paralyzed.
She smirked as she stared straight into his eyes, an icy expression no one would expect from someone as warm as Aphrodite. It was as if Hades himself had materialized in her place. "I am the Goddess of Love," she loftily declared. "Your wife came to me out of desperation. Your love is dying."
The blood was drained from Cleaver's face as Aphrodite stepped back appearing thoroughly satisfied. She held out a hand and with an explosion of blue smoke, a small, delicately wrapped box of chocolates appeared in her palm. "I think you were looking for this."
She held up a finger as Cleaver reached for it, pausing his movement. "First," she said, "you must say, 'I am a pink and passionate lovebug.'"
A glimmer of disgust passed over Cleaver's features. "But that's completely absurd."
A beatific smile spread on Aphrodite's face as she wrapped an arm around his shoulder in a friendly gesture. "Cleaver, Cleaver, dear Captain Cleaver," she said pleasantly. "I must know that you will embrace the celebration of love from now on. You need to feel it. You need to be the celebration of love. For your wife."
It was as if a lightbulb had suddenly switched on. Cleaver's face glowed with marvelous joy brighter than Apollo in December. "I am a pink and passionate lovebug," he whispered. "I am a pink and passionate lovebug." He repeated the phrase over and over again as he clutched the box of chocolate to his chest, each time louder and with more fervor. "I AM A PINK AND PASSIONATE LOVEBUG!"
All activity in the palace abruptly stopped as the King of Midnight ran out of the throne room in a fit of frenzied euphoria. His continuous yell of ecstasy echoed through the main corridor, slowly fading away.
There was a soft pop as Hephaestus appeared beside the throne in a cloud of blue smoke, jaw dropped in awe. "I can't believe he said that," he said slowly. "He's gone mad. Dear Nemo, the Captain's gone mad."
"You know it," Aphrodite smugly replied. "Where's my island?"
--
The citizens of Midnight were overjoyed to hear that their surly king had finally expressed his approval of Valentine's Day. However, those that happened upon the Jet Archipelago were very confused when they strolled by the sign reading, "Welcome to Aphrodite's Forge".
approximately 1400 words
edit: from the event thread:
And our winner taking home her very own red octo :
Bisquick of Midnight - The King of Midnight