(no subject)
I HATE GIRLS.
Absolutely hate them. Hate them to the point of where I can't stand them. Girls should stop existing. Let's make my life easier.
Mousse can make out with the girl I like all he wants, but I'm the one who gets the daytime sober calls. And that's worth more than a drunken night anytime. I'm going to start a facebook group called Mousse Makeout just to represent all the game that player has.
Guess how many he made out with? Guess. Take a gander. Screw this. calamityjake, gay me up. I'm ready. I'm sure you'd be the authority on that one. I don't even know where I was when these pictures were taken or how they got on my camera, but am I glad that they're there?
Random Guy: I've never met a black person before.
Me: What do you want me to say? Hello? Boo? I'm gonna shoot you and steal your money?
Random Guy: Oh no, I've just never met a black person before.
Me: Well hi, my name is Brandon. My friend over there she happens to be another black person. See how her skin is all brown, that's how you can tell. And this girl, her name is Alice, she's Asian. Do you know what an Asian is?
Random Guy: So why are you called black when you're brown?
Me: Because people in Africa are actually black. Here in America, our skin has adjusted to the climate and the sun.
Random Guy: Cool.
Me: Yeah, it kind of is.
Drunk white boys are funny. How have you never met a black person in Michigan? Seriously. That's like going to Compton or Harlem and asking "Where da black people at?" They're behind you, with a gun cocked at the back of your head. This kid must have been way up there in the upper white peninsula. Repeating this conversation isn't helping that thing that I occassionally get annoyed about on the internet.
Back to the subject at hand, I can't stand the games chicks like to play.
Hey I know, why don't we just be the opposite of forward and the negative of anything that makes sense to confuse as many men as possible. Let's start by never stating what's on our minds making them have to guess and then getting pissed at the fact that they constantly guess wrong and then getting even more pissed when they start to get pissed about why we're pissed.
Someone get on a list of mind games we can play. Like Sorry, or Trouble, or Candyland. But with really funny ramifications like "You drew the dog pound card. Take five steps backwards, no sex for a month" or "You landed on the jail space, lose a turn, and prepare for butt sex."
Yesterday, I was across the hall meagerly watching the MSU game and one of the guy's girlfriends came in and asked him if he was watching the game. Which you could clearly see that he was. Instead of just asking him if he would stop watching the game, she had to ask if he was watching the game to sort of elude to the fact that she didn't want him to watch it. Why do girls pull that shit? Furthermore, why do they always get away with it?
I think he sort of picked up on what she was insinuating. But being a guy he's not going to turn his back on football, so he asked "Do you want to do something right now?" And she responded with one of those, "No, I don't mind if you watch the game," which was really code for "Yes, I totally fucking mind and I want to beat your ass bloody right now." I'm observing this thinking, how old are you? Forty seven? Are you married, because you're acting like a little married bitch right now.
Chill out honey. You've got a couple more years to go before you can completely start talking out of your vagina. I don't even like football, but that was enough to make me want to hate a bitch. Ladies, please just speak your minds. Communication has to be accurately recieved for it to work. Nobody appreciates cryptic crap. Just pass go and collect the damn two hundred bucks. Remember what Mick Jagger said, "You can't always get what you want."
Absolutely hate them. Hate them to the point of where I can't stand them. Girls should stop existing. Let's make my life easier.
Mousse can make out with the girl I like all he wants, but I'm the one who gets the daytime sober calls. And that's worth more than a drunken night anytime. I'm going to start a facebook group called Mousse Makeout just to represent all the game that player has.
Guess how many he made out with? Guess. Take a gander. Screw this. calamityjake, gay me up. I'm ready. I'm sure you'd be the authority on that one. I don't even know where I was when these pictures were taken or how they got on my camera, but am I glad that they're there?
Random Guy: I've never met a black person before.
Me: What do you want me to say? Hello? Boo? I'm gonna shoot you and steal your money?
Random Guy: Oh no, I've just never met a black person before.
Me: Well hi, my name is Brandon. My friend over there she happens to be another black person. See how her skin is all brown, that's how you can tell. And this girl, her name is Alice, she's Asian. Do you know what an Asian is?
Random Guy: So why are you called black when you're brown?
Me: Because people in Africa are actually black. Here in America, our skin has adjusted to the climate and the sun.
Random Guy: Cool.
Me: Yeah, it kind of is.
Drunk white boys are funny. How have you never met a black person in Michigan? Seriously. That's like going to Compton or Harlem and asking "Where da black people at?" They're behind you, with a gun cocked at the back of your head. This kid must have been way up there in the upper white peninsula. Repeating this conversation isn't helping that thing that I occassionally get annoyed about on the internet.
Back to the subject at hand, I can't stand the games chicks like to play.
Hey I know, why don't we just be the opposite of forward and the negative of anything that makes sense to confuse as many men as possible. Let's start by never stating what's on our minds making them have to guess and then getting pissed at the fact that they constantly guess wrong and then getting even more pissed when they start to get pissed about why we're pissed.
Someone get on a list of mind games we can play. Like Sorry, or Trouble, or Candyland. But with really funny ramifications like "You drew the dog pound card. Take five steps backwards, no sex for a month" or "You landed on the jail space, lose a turn, and prepare for butt sex."
Yesterday, I was across the hall meagerly watching the MSU game and one of the guy's girlfriends came in and asked him if he was watching the game. Which you could clearly see that he was. Instead of just asking him if he would stop watching the game, she had to ask if he was watching the game to sort of elude to the fact that she didn't want him to watch it. Why do girls pull that shit? Furthermore, why do they always get away with it?
I think he sort of picked up on what she was insinuating. But being a guy he's not going to turn his back on football, so he asked "Do you want to do something right now?" And she responded with one of those, "No, I don't mind if you watch the game," which was really code for "Yes, I totally fucking mind and I want to beat your ass bloody right now." I'm observing this thinking, how old are you? Forty seven? Are you married, because you're acting like a little married bitch right now.
Chill out honey. You've got a couple more years to go before you can completely start talking out of your vagina. I don't even like football, but that was enough to make me want to hate a bitch. Ladies, please just speak your minds. Communication has to be accurately recieved for it to work. Nobody appreciates cryptic crap. Just pass go and collect the damn two hundred bucks. Remember what Mick Jagger said, "You can't always get what you want."