Shes a girls that over that love stuff

[birth2thegrave]

Ugh...this new medication gives me a tummy ache...ugh! want to puke. so bad. oh well..so today was a pretty okay day..pretty okay..i will admit that i did think about jason...he texted me lastnight while i was sleeping..oh well..i dont know exactly what he expects of me.....am i supposed to be wonder woman...and let him hurt me the way he did..and then stand up to take more..just because when i didnt know he was hurting me i was happy...not really...it hurts..im hurt...and im not gonna put myself in that situation again..and said to me.."what does it matter...we were both happy" well now im not happy..very not happy...but im getting there..without him..but apparently he thinks that im joking when i told him that i dont want to talk to him again..and i can understand that cause im clearly full of bluffs..but im serious..it's hard..but im serious..i cry...and im still do serious..i miss him..but dammit..im serious...and i learned so much...sooo much...and i lost so much...and i bled so much....oh well...i have a secret obsession with alanis morisette that i have recently come to terms with...lol..i've had it since 5th grade i think...and right now...it's shining bright...and a big! HIP HIP HOORAY FOR ME...so why do i go for the fixeruppers? kinda guy...jason cant be changed! he needs a babysitter...he needs to feel special by be given shiny objects...im so cold..goosebumps...remember those books? used to love reading them...so what am i gonna do..what is my plan of action...well i hope this medication makes me happier...but i dont want it to take away my hate for jason...last time i spoke..he told me he missed me...and i wanted to scream..then puke a little..cause thats so gay...im definately passed that gay ass lovey dovey shit...from him atleast...haha..and i hope he enjoys his indian..lol...back to my plan of action...i hope everything turns out well...hey did you know jon heder is a mormon..and he's married...thats hot...i swear im gonna puke..maybe i should eat something..UGH..i was told to take the medication with crackers...hahah..see..im fucking up already...lol..but i like it..cause im doing it all on my own!..lol

i love you gen....i support you..and you're such a bright girl..you can do this..and anything..and you're gonna change the world regardless of grades..we both know how things go..and you can do this!...gen's the best friend in the world!