I've just spent the last, oh, half an hour or so, sobbing. First in my desk chair and then in the bathroom until it tapered off. Why? Because I finally settled in to read
cesperanza's amazing
Written by the Victors*, and about two hours after finishing, in the middle of listening to
fleurrochard chant one of
aesc's
apocryphal texts, I just broke down. The hell of it was, I'
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Comments 19
And it's not House's death at the end that does it -- it's the vision of a once-vital House, reduced to a brain-damaged shell of his former self, that just sinks its claws into my heart and won't let go.
I literally have trouble rereading this story. The only other story I can think of that I have such a strong reaction to is deelaundry's Locked Up and Set Free.
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Those two didn't make me cry, but "Locked Up and Set Free" did (though not as hard or as long as the ones I mentioned in my post) -- you probably know the line I mean, at the end -- and in the middle of a workday, no less. There, too, it wasn't a character death that did it, but the miscommunication. If only he'd said what he felt! If only he'd made the right moves when there was still time! It's one of the things that moves me about "Aftershocks," too.
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Forgive me not linking the Aphasic!Rodney story -- we're making dinner and I keep coming back to check LJ.
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That's what it was called.
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(I did leave them both comments in among their billions of other comments, btw. Because, yeah, it's important to let them know.)
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I am, in fact, completely aware that this might not make sense.
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I'm happy for her, too -- the adulation is much deserved, as it was for her other remarkable stories (well, I can vouch for almost all of the ones I've read, anyway). The real challenge for her, I think, is going to be figuring out how to follow this one up.
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Outlander didn't make you weep? ;-)
Thank you for the SG:A rec. I was a bit alarmed when you said you were sobbing, but I understand now that it was for a good cause. Putting it on my Must Read list.
Regarding heartaches: I have a special "sad song" that I play when I read something that is supposed to be sad ("Farewell" from the Children of Dune soundtrack -- I know, FTW!), so that makes any death!fic that much worse/better (depending how you look at it).
I think possibly the only time I ever cried at a non-sad fic was mer_duff's The A to Z of House" .* The idea was cute, but the execution was phenomenal -- in so few words she sketched little word paintings, sad, happy, and every emotion in between. The delicacy was just so amazing and haunting.
And I am always moved by anagnorisis. I keep meaning to write blurbs in my LJ about the things that I like best about fanfic (but I'm shy), and that is probably at the top of my list.
*Remember, up here it's zed ;-)
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I know what it feels like to tear up a little when a character dies in a really well-written fic, I know what it is to ache along with a character over relationship angst/unrequited love, but not to have it stay with me.
I don't think I'm ever completely immersed in a work; there's always part of me that's looking at how it's written. I go to plays and half the time I'm thinking about the scenery or staging rather than the actors. With movies it's the music and cinematography.
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