On being inadvertently drawn (in)to fandom wank: when you have friends on both sides
I have friends who don't know each other who are entrenched on either side of a major fandom wank right now, and it is a very weird place to be. Not that it is about me at all, or the individuals involved*, but I find myself wondering at the social politics of it more than the actual issue at stake. Namely: How do you take a side? (Why) must you take a side? Are you responsible, as a friend and community member, to thoroughly verse yourself in the recent history of the wank and the posts it has spawned? Should you disregard all personal relations (if that's even possible) to attempt at least that much objectivity before approaching the situation?
*Except it is, because things have turned personal, as they tend to.
On the one hand, I have been on the receiving end of very articulate wank by respected LJ community members before, and I know it is not a fun place to be; that in the face of such reaction, one might become tangled in one's own defenses; and so my sympathies go to the people who are trying to deal with this right now, regardless of whether they are in the right -- if there is a right. On the other hand, from what little I've seen of the arguments, the opposition seems justified, and I suspect that if I didn't know the people they are criticizing, didn't know that they are good and decent and intelligent, I might more easily disagree with or dismiss or even insult them (though not publicly, I would hope) as others are doing.
And so I wonder: How can you side with the opposition when many of them personally attack others of your friends? How can you defend those under attack when you suspect that you agree with the people who disagree with them? Do you find a middle ground in which you defend your friends as people while potentially (since again, I'm not well-versed in the details here) disagreeing with their position? Do you stay the hell away from it all?
Or do you make a thinly veiled post about it and avoid the issue entirely?
ETA: I'm not looking for advice, really. But if you have been in a situation like this before, in any capacity, I'd be interested to hear how you dealt with it and how it turned out.
ETA 2: The argument seems to have just been resolved, although I'm sure it will take days for the ripples to fade. So while the questions aren't presently applicable anymore, they're still a good theoretical exercise, and sadly, will probably be useful when another situation like this arises in the future.
ETA 3: This isn't a House fandom issue -- you're not missing something!
...
Steering clear of wank is my usual modus operandi. It's taken a while to decide to post even this. It's doubtless related to my innate desire for mediation, my frustration with argument and debate, and frankly, my distaste for social politics in general. (The "who's mad at whom" game is childish and irrelevant, the thinking goes... at least, when you don't know the people involved.) On top of which, there's no way to win an online argument when it descends into wank, and there's certainly no way to achieve resolution when things reach these proportions. There are just bad feelings all around.
Anyway. Comments are screened.
*Except it is, because things have turned personal, as they tend to.
On the one hand, I have been on the receiving end of very articulate wank by respected LJ community members before, and I know it is not a fun place to be; that in the face of such reaction, one might become tangled in one's own defenses; and so my sympathies go to the people who are trying to deal with this right now, regardless of whether they are in the right -- if there is a right. On the other hand, from what little I've seen of the arguments, the opposition seems justified, and I suspect that if I didn't know the people they are criticizing, didn't know that they are good and decent and intelligent, I might more easily disagree with or dismiss or even insult them (though not publicly, I would hope) as others are doing.
And so I wonder: How can you side with the opposition when many of them personally attack others of your friends? How can you defend those under attack when you suspect that you agree with the people who disagree with them? Do you find a middle ground in which you defend your friends as people while potentially (since again, I'm not well-versed in the details here) disagreeing with their position? Do you stay the hell away from it all?
Or do you make a thinly veiled post about it and avoid the issue entirely?
ETA: I'm not looking for advice, really. But if you have been in a situation like this before, in any capacity, I'd be interested to hear how you dealt with it and how it turned out.
ETA 2: The argument seems to have just been resolved, although I'm sure it will take days for the ripples to fade. So while the questions aren't presently applicable anymore, they're still a good theoretical exercise, and sadly, will probably be useful when another situation like this arises in the future.
ETA 3: This isn't a House fandom issue -- you're not missing something!
...
Steering clear of wank is my usual modus operandi. It's taken a while to decide to post even this. It's doubtless related to my innate desire for mediation, my frustration with argument and debate, and frankly, my distaste for social politics in general. (The "who's mad at whom" game is childish and irrelevant, the thinking goes... at least, when you don't know the people involved.) On top of which, there's no way to win an online argument when it descends into wank, and there's certainly no way to achieve resolution when things reach these proportions. There are just bad feelings all around.
Anyway. Comments are screened.